[Gigglyboots]

Where are you?
Not here, but as long as you stick to the proper side of the road no one has a problem with it.

[Sidders]

Come to think of it, my home town has it's fair share of eccentrics too:

The chicken woman: She frequents the public houses and makes chicken noises and impersonates cats. She also talks really fast.

Tom a.k.a. Malcom the Megastar and Thomas Pepys: He's also in the pub every night of the week. He never stays in pubs for longer than about 10 minutes and always drinks half pints. I've never seen him drink a whole pint. He carries a pad of paper everywhere and records everything he sees (hence the nickname Thomas Pepys). The troble is, no one can read his writing because it's so small.

Trikker: A nice enough bloke, but you can tell when he's lieing because his lips move. He got sacked from the Red Dragon for turning up drunk.

Alister: I've never heard him speak. He wanders the streets dragging his dog behind him. He also smells and if you're standing behind him in the queue at the co-op then you have to keep your distance.

Me: Nuff said.

For legal reasons, some of these details have been changed.

[Morals]

Is that rasta busker still about? He used to have one song, something about smoking cocaine...

[Sidders]

I dunno who you mean, where abouts did he dwell?

[Morals]

I think he used to hang out near the arcade on the road where the very bazaar is (sort of across the road from HMV)

[Sidders]

I've never seen him.

[Morals]

Shame, he was class. Would be quite happy to be in Leicester now, sat in Crustys with a nice fry up and cup of tea.... Ah, memories...

[Sez]

Why do scruffy little druggie scrotes say 'Can you spare 20p for a bag of chips?'. Where the *beep* can you get a bag of chips for 20p????????

it was in the paper yesterday about that beggar who gets £14 000 a year so dont give them anything

[Nor]

Yeah cos you can always rely on the papers telling the truth

Notwithstanding the papers being full of sensationalist lies I'd still agree that you shouldn't hand out money without giving it some thought first.

[Sidders]

Actually that's a true story. One of the beggers that used to sit outside HMV in Leicester made shit loads of dosh and managed to support a family and have a country house and drive a BMW. There was an enquiry into it on 5live.

[Sez]

it was something like he was given £40 a week and got his hostels paid for i think

[Minnie the Minx]

Er, that's because it's illegal to ride a bicycle on pavements. There is a fine attached, but I've not heard of any instances of this law being enforced. - jc

I was too young to ride on the roads.

And today I had someone asking if they could wash our car... in the rain.

They didnt understand it when I told them theres no point washing a car in the rain.

Weird people where I live:

Mr Xylophone Man - Old man sits on pavement playing a xylophone that looks like he bought it from the Early Learning Centre. He just sits there with a grin on his face going 'ding ding ding' on the xylophone.

The Snake Man - Walks around with a snake wrapped around his shoulders. Once one of the snakes escaped.

[M+L Fan II]

Is this Nottingham we're talking about with Xylophone man? Because he is quality.
Also, the beggars issue; they had a good idea in Derby, where if you want to help out homeless people you pay money into a collection box so that it's handed out to people who need it rather than little druggie scumbags.

[Gigglyboots]

I can't think up of any people like that here - its so plain and boring.

[magenta]

There's a woman round here who is about 70, very wrinkly body, and dresses in tiny tops and miniskirts, the sort of stuff that Britney Spears would wear. She also has her bellybutton pierced. There's the woman that poos outside too.

[Chief Erf]

Did anyone see the guy who was gunna be burned at the stake in Leicester last saturday. Their slogan was 'This man is to be persurcuted for being just like you'.
A couple of kids kept chucking lighters at him to burn him. Kerrazy!!!

[Sez]

Is this Nottingham we're talking about with Xylophone man? Because he is quality.
Also, the beggars issue; they had a good idea in Derby, where if you want to help out homeless people you pay money into a collection box so that it's handed out to people who need it rather than little druggie scumbags.

I love that old man on the xylophone! Hes been there since I was little-is he still alive because I dont think i've seen him in ages?

[Minnie the Minx]

Yeah I am on about the Notts one. He is a legend.

I thought some people would recognise him. I saw him a couple of months ago. Although I think people now prefer those Chilean men that stand outside Marks and Spencers.

[Lawrie]

you Notts people are wierd..even more than those people from Bradford (no offence Poppy!)

Bradford.....nothing decent except for..........erm.......arg..........the roads going to leeds!

[Benjoo]

Leicester is the capital for them religeous nuts. Every week you get street preachers at the clock tower.

I was once in Dundee and there was this guy who rapped............about jesus

[Everlast]

I remember a member of the Black Panthers Tap Dancing and rapping about equal rights and he was very good