Off-topic chat. May contain offensive language or images.
User avatar
By Yudster
#487067
I'm married to a (much) younger man - unfortunately he is at work, otherwise your suggestion would be unnecessary...
User avatar
By Boboff
#487076
I am sure your mother would say that all that swearing is not appropriate Ms Yudster.

I have the alternative advert where I wake up after some cider and my mouth looks like a tall ape has shat in it ( after throwing my clothes around the room and spending all my money)

Nic, I do understand what you are saying a little bit, but in all honesty I don't think you would ever be "happy" unless the whole evening was tailored to your specific, and very niche needs. So really you best stay at home.
User avatar
By Yudster
#487079
I love you Boboff.
User avatar
By Nicola_Red
#487082
boboff wrote:Nic, I do understand what you are saying a little bit, but in all honesty I don't think you would ever be "happy" unless the whole evening was tailored to your specific, and very niche needs. So really you best stay at home.


I didn't realise arthritis was so specific and niche, but thanks for the advice. In fact I will be going to Shrewsbury to see my lovely boyfriend DJ instead.
User avatar
By dimtimjim
#487085
Yudster wrote:Adverts are annoying me. The toothpaste ad with the idiot woman saying "my teeth are squeaking clean" - the phrase is SQUEAKY clean, not * squeaking clean! And the Knorr gravy ad with the pretend "chef" saying "remember how good home made gravy used to taste?" YES I * DO, I MAKE IT EVERY * WEEKEND YOU TIT!!!!


I couldn't agree more, the toothpaste one really annoys me too.

chrysostom wrote:He must be in his late forties...


I'll admit, I :lol: 'd. Well done Andy. Sorry Yuds.
User avatar
By Nicola_Red
#487092
chrysostom wrote:*suppresses joke about him tailoring to your niche needs*


Oh, he definitely does ;)
User avatar
By Nicola_Red
#487097
It certainly is. I'm in love and very happy. I've been told off for going on about it though.
User avatar
By a-moron
#487104
Nicola_Red wrote:
chrysostom wrote:*suppresses joke about him tailoring to your niche needs*


Oh, he definitely does ;)


Yeah, he doesn't eat Nic out as this is against her vegan beliefs of devouring meat.
He instead chucks a couple of quorn burger down there and gives her nipples a tweak every now and then.
He's a very considerate lover.
User avatar
By Nicola_Red
#487105
To be clear, that is definitely not against my beliefs. Also, Quorn isn't vegan :)
User avatar
By a-moron
#487108
Bugger.

Ah, no, wait a minute, it's not actual meat though and he is the one feasting upon them, so in principle this situation still works.

I think.
User avatar
By Nicola_Red
#487110
Yeah, I guess. He's an omni though. He has said he'd become vegetarian if it made me happy, but I've told him that I don't expect him to do that and a compromise can be easily reached, as I did with my flatmate, who is also omni.
User avatar
By a-moron
#487112
Omnisexual?!

Jesus Nic, you've got a keeper there.

And so was your flatmate?

My God women, you must attract them.
User avatar
By dimtimjim
#487123
theflyingbadger wrote:Yeah, he doesn't eat Nic out as this is against her vegan beliefs of devouring meat.


Ah... Grimsby.





Note: Not a slant on Nic, jus' in general.
User avatar
By dimtimjim
#487127
Far from it, its one of my bestestest pastimes.

It was a humerous/dutty slant on the smell created when femi-hygiene is not up to scratch.

As the saying goes - "No one wants to eat off a dirty plate".
User avatar
By dimtimjim
#487129
Ha! Wow... Nice to know you appreciate it too (not from me, mind)! I know Mrs DTJ does! :wink:

EDIT: And Mrs Badger, but Ssssshhh. 8O :?
User avatar
By chrysostom
#487136
User avatar
By dimtimjim
#487141
boboff wrote:Wow thats so School days... eat someone out! Yukk


Oh... Poor Mrs Bobski. (unless you mean the expression, not the act, in which case I kinda agree)

charlalottie wrote:It's more the general issue that it seems more acceptable to give oral to a man than it does a woman.


Well, a favour for a favour - works for me!
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