chrismoyles.net
- Mon Jul 05, 2004 9:52 am
#241962
HAPPY SIXTH MONTH ANNIVERSARY TO THE CHRIS MOYLES BREAKFAST SHOW!!!
1. The Hives - Walk Idiot Walk 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. 50 Cent - In Da Club, 3. Snow Patrol - Spitting Games, 4. Joss Stone - Super Duper Love, 5. BUZZ OFF - All Saints - I Know Where It’s At, 6. The White Stripes - 7 Nation Army 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Scissor Sisters - Laura, 8. Mary J Blige - Family Affair, 9. Usher - Burn, 10. Blink 182 - I Miss You 8:00 NEWSBEAT 11. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 12. David Gray - Babylon, 13. Rachel Stevens - Some Girls 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Basement Jaxx - Where’s Your Head At, 15. Jamelia - See It In A Boy's Eyes, 16. Maroon 5 - This Love, 17. The Jam - A Town Called Malice (Tedious Link), 18. Mario Winans feat Enya & P. Diddy - I Don't Wanna Know, 19. Badly Drawn Boy - Year Of The Rat, 20. Lou Reed - Satellite Of Love (Dab Hands Remix) 9:30 NEWSBEAT 21. Destiny’s Child - Independent Women, 22. The Streets - Dry Your Eyes, 23. Nelly Furtado - Forca
Yep, today marks the six month mark for the team on Breakfast - who said they’d never make it? (I dunno actually...who did...). Anyway, Chris wasn’t going to let the landmark pass unmentioned on this his 119th breakfast show. Frequent Stevie Wonder choruses of “Happy Birthday To You” rang throughout the show, with lots of top celebrities on hand to pass on their messages of congratulation to Chris, Dave, Rachel and Aled. First up was *oooh Hollyoaks* Mr Vernon Kay from Bolton, who wished the team all the best and thanked Chris for helping him settle in at Radio One over the past six months (which now he has done and I think Vernon is sounding so much better for it). Vernon signed off his message by challenging Chris to another round of Euro 2004 X Box fun, with him promising to kick his arse this time (we’ve heard it all before Kay). Moyles accepted the challenge as he is the X Box daddy folks, don’t you forget that. Other happy half birthday messages came courtesy of Paul McKenna (crap), Shane Ritchie (sounded drunk), some weird opera singer and that crazy afternoon show host Mr Scott *good mornin’* Mills (live from his toilet). However, the <s>worst</s> best three messages undoubtedly came from ex Eastender Shaun Williamson, popular R’n’B songstress Javine...and erm, ex Hearsay member Kym Marsh. The last two clips were identically worded and 4 seconds long, making Chris think that perhaps they were reading a script, hmm. Well if they were, then Shaun certainly wasn’t - he lifted the words right off the page and said the following with such an overwhelming amount of passion...
Shaun - Happy anniversary Chris, Dave, Rachel and Aled - they’ve been on Breakfast six months and mornings have never sounded so good
(Dave laughs)
Dominic asked if the team were supposed to have brought in presents for one and other. Chris said yeah, he had a tenner to share between everyone. He then made sound effects as if he was ripping the note into five for a £2 slice each. Dom said he had a sheet of A4 with “happy birthday” written on it, Rach an apple for everyone, Aled some milk, Jules (who was back) a CD and Dave some of Rachel’s chapstick. Rock on. Chris said to celebrate six months on the Radio One Breakfast Show, he was going to choose a Buzz Off song from the year he joined Radio One (1997). It was such a disappointment in the end, as he went for I Know Where It’s At by All Saints (no.4 in Sep 97). I’m pretty sure it’s the first ever Buzz Off repeat play, and Dave has also used it on Tedious Link already this year. It’s a good tune but the response wasn’t too great in all honesty - first Rach got rid of it on 1:29, then the listeners buzzed it off second on 2:10, Dave followed in third on 2:14 and Aled brought up the rear (for a change) on 2:32. As I mentioned earlier, Juliette has returned from her two weeks in exile at Wimbledon and she said she had been feeling wet and damp. We’re glad she’s back too, but I think she was probably referring more to her time in the rain at the tennis. Jules was pleased to be back and didn’t believe Chris when he said that he hadn’t even spoken to the girl reading the sport in the last two weeks, Carol was it? Jules said she knew he had been talking to her as it said so on the unofficial Chris Moyles website (hello there). Well I am the voice of authority after all...*cough*. Chris said he’s missed the stink of booze and perfume in the studio for the past fortnight, no matter how hard Carrie tried. Plus Jules has bigger knockers than Carrie, so that’s always a bonus (if you pardon the expression). Chris continued the link but it quickly lost momentum...
Jules - Are you filling now?
Chris - No, I’m just pleased you’re back
(Dom and Dave laugh)
(Welcome back Juliette...and thanks for the kind of mention)
The main story in both this morning’s news and sport was Greece’s shock triumph at Euro 2004, with them beating Portugal 1-0 last night to claim the title. This was great news for Moyles, as you may remember he had Greece in the Radio One pub sweepstake, which he originally thought was a fix but is now more than delighted with. Steve Lamacq had Portugal so Chris said he’d no doubt be happy on Lamacq Live tonight, although mind you who can tell? Chris did his legendary Lamacq impression and somehow managed to get in the *loverly knockers* line, although it took a fair bit of setting up. Another happy soldier after last night’s result is of course bonafide Greek and potential Greek Olympiad Nemone, who was read out in a long list of other famous Greek stuff by Moyles before Buzz Off. The list included: Stelios from EasyJet, kebabs, moussaka, humus, Denis Roussos, John Travolta (Grease) and Dave’s mate Andy The Greek. Congratulations to one and all. Other sport making the headlines today was the news that Britain’s Miles Kasiri failed in his bid to become Britain's first Wimbledon boy's singles champion for 42 years, losing yesterday to France's Gael Monfils in straight sets. Miles is 18 and Chris suggested he cop off with Sharapova who’s only 17. If Miles isn’t interested in the offer then I most certainly am (and btw I’m not some old perv - I am actually 3 days younger than Sharapova). Thankfully Chris steered the conversation down a rather different course to that of Dave and Chappers on Saturday. He said “what a woman hubba hubba” and said that if he was going out with her he’d make her wear her tennis clobber all the time, cos she looks (extremely) fit in it. Dom scoffed and said it was probably worth pointing out that she is a very good tennis player too. Erm yeah Dom, she won it..
Chris - and she’s got cracking legs
(weather stab)
(a picture of Maria Sharapova in my review for definitely the last time...this week)
MOYLES @ EURODISNEY:
Chris - I took my girlfriend to Disneyland this weekend
Dom - Eurostar?
Chris - Thank you very much, and I paid for everything as well
(all laugh and Dave “guh huhs” into Johnny Vaughan jingle)
Chris said he really enjoyed himself at EuroDisney, despite the fact that it’s full of kids and French people, who don’t understand the concept of a queue. Chris said come to think of it, no one is as polite as us Brits when it comes to queuing.
Dave - We invented queuing (my quote of the day)
Chris and Sophie got the Eurostar first and then two trains in France, one to Lille and then another one on to EuroDisney in Paris. Chris made a point of praising the French train system and said that apart from the considerable price, there was nothing stopping the team all travelling out there after the show one morning. Rachel was up for the idea and she is the producer after all. Chris met all his favourite Disney stars yesterday - Minnie, the Chipmunks, Pinnochio, Goofy and Donald. He even admitted to getting his photo taken with both Mickey and Pluto, prompting Dave to call him sad...
Chris - no no no no
Dave - You’re 30 years old, what’s the matter with you man?
(Rachel laughs)
Chris - No shut up I’m 24, 24, 24 Dave
(hits Joss Stone vocal)
Chris refuted Dominic’s claim that the people who play Mickey etc are idiots, simply insisting that they were grown men dressed as big mice. Chris told the story of how his mate Longman got kicked out of DisneyLand in Florida for alcohol related offences, and was careful not to make the same mistake himself. He praised Space Mountain, Indiana Jones and the Aerosmith rock and rollercoaster ride, although he said Armageddon was a waste of time. He also said that the “it’s a small world ride” was highly racist and very offensive, despite Sophie’s claim that it was just cute kiddies singing. Chris said it was the most stereotypical stuff ever though - leprechauns for the Irish, bagpipes for the Scots, clogs for the Dutch, onions and stripy jumpers for the French and convict outfits for the Aussies. Hands across the water Chris.
SPORT RELIEF STUFF - JO BRAND LIVE ON THE PHONE:
The big push is on now. This Saturday is Sport Relief Saturday and all we are gonna hear about this week is Sport Relief unfortunately. I mean it’s charidee and a good cause and all that but it can get quite repetitive on the radio, especially with the text stuff. This was launched today btw - allowing you to sponsor either or both of Chris and Scott in their respective Moyles and Mills’ miles. All you need to do is send a text saying either Chris or Scott to 82125 (note the different number to usual). All texts are charged at £1 with 70p going to Sport Relief and the other 30p covering administrative costs. I can exclusively reveal (kind of) that at the end of Day 1 Chris has a huge 9077 votes to Scott’s 1367, raising so far a total (on his own) of nearly 7 grand so far (see the scores updated here). The plugging of this was only interrupted once - that by Chris being given out as an option for a question on GMTV. No matter how fast I flicked my TV onto ITV, I missed it (although Chris said the answer was c). Lorraine Kelly then re appeared on screen, causing a big discussion on her that slight devalued the whole Sport Relief thing. Plus when you think Sport Relief, you automatically think of that fitness guru Jo Brand, and that’s who was on the show this morning at 8:15 to talk about said event.
She was hilarious actually, much better than I’d expected. It’s well known that comedians and Chris don’t get on well on the whole, but she seems to be an exception (with “seems” the crucial word there). She said she was awake early by her standards today as she usually gets up just before Countdown, prompting an inquiry as to Richard Whiteley’s possible participation in this weekends events. Jo said she got involved with Sport Relief after being pinned to the wall and threatened with violence, as (and you may not believe this) running’s not really her thing. Chris told her about how he lost a load of weight a couple of years back and now has put it all back on again, to which she asked what time he is hoping to clock in the race on Saturday. He explained that there was a bit of a sob story to his race actually...
Jo - Pulled a muscle doing your trainer up did you?
Chris - No, my fathers quadruple heart bypass
Jo - Oh dear sorry...
(Chris and Dave laugh)
Jo - ...do send him my best
Chris explained how he is going to run the mile, run back to his dad and then walk the remainder with him. Jo wasn’t so sure that “running back” would be an option though, what with that coming after running a mile in the first place. Chris asked her if she never had a mobile fish & chip van in her area as a kid then. She said no she didn’t unfortunately, as she grew up in Kent. She said she is just hoping to finish the mile by Sunday afternoon, despite the fact she’s been training a bit. Chris reminded her that there’ll always be someone worse than her. She said she wasn’t so sure, especially if Whiteley’s not doing it. She gave maximum respect to Moyles for not having starting training yet, although he let her in on his secret plan to keep him going...
Chris - I’ve devised an attachment to my baseball cap - a stick and a packet of 20 Marlboro Lights hanging off the side. That should spur me on
Jo - Could you send me one of those with a bakewell tart on the end?
(Chris and Dave laugh)
Chris - Not a problem
Jo is running the race in Brighton on Saturday, with Chris, Will and Aled (BB press conference permitting) all in Leeds. Dave and Chappers will be on the Live Lounge treadmills at 1pm, with them programming no segway and a short record to start with, at least guaranteeing one link of them running while jogging. More details of the weekends events can of course be found @ http://www.sportrelief.com, where you can register too for the mile in your area (or outside your area). Registration fee is £7.50 not 6 quid, but you must register if you want to run. Clear? Good.
CHART UPDATE WITH WES:>>>>
(Listen Again To Th Official Chart with Wes Here)
Wes was on again for today’s chart check up, saying that he can’t believe it’s been six months now of him getting up every Monday morning at half seven. The commitment eh. Wes had a bit of a showbiz tale from his night out last night. He was at The Royal Albert Hall for one of Elton John’s celebrity bashes. He wasn’t personally invited but had contacts who’d got him in, and he had to go there all on his own (feeling understandably nervous). Ironically he was sat on the only table in the swanky after show dinner that Elton didn’t visit, leaving Wes next to some old lady - and when I say “lady” I mean as in a wife of a lord. He didn’t know who she was though, although for some reason she did get very excited when he told her that he worked for Radio One. On the table next to Wes last night was Liz Hurley, showing off her cleavage in a very lovely orange number. Wes said she is undoubtedly the most gorgeous woman he’s ever seen in his life, and he repeatedly called her amazing until Chris told him to calm down and stop it now.
Dave - Was Furnish there last night?
Wes - Who?
Dave - I said was Furnish there last night?
Wes - It was furnished there yes
Dave - No, was Furnish there? (Chris laughs)
Wes (realising) - Oh David Furnish?
(Chris and Rachel laugh)
What a pillock. Ready to give a run down on the state of the furnishing as well. If I were him I’d stick to the chart...and he did. Number one this week is Burn by Usher, which should be burnt. All copies of it in fact. Girls Aloud went in at 2 and Chocolate by Kylie at 6, which Dave and Chris thought a bit flattering for what they consider to be an album track. I was like that at first but it’s grown on me since. Wes couldn’t join in any of these discussions though, as he has to remain impartial remember. Ah well, it never stopped Jo Whiley when she did the chart a couple of years back did it (that'll test your memories).
BB ALED IS BACK <s>(OH GOD)</s> (JOY!):>>>>
Tis true, he finally returned at 9:20 this morning to give the results from Marco’s press conference on Saturday. It remains to be seen whether he’ll be on every day, but I suspect it’ll just be every Monday and Friday. Marco’s press conference was moved to Saturday morning because the police wanted to talk to him on Friday night, so Aled had to get up bright and early to be there on time. Chris said that he heard Aled also woke Dominic up at about 20 past 8 that morning...
Dom - Yeah he did, Saturday morning
Chris - What, did he give you a nudge?
(all laugh)
Dom - No I wasn’t sleeping next to Aled...
Chris - Right
Dom - ...obviously (all continue to laugh)
The mobile actually went off, with Aled on the other end asking Dom if he had any questions for him to ask Marco. I believe Dom’s reply went something along the lines of “er, sorry *yawn* no it’s fine, fine, I was already up, right questions for Marco *yawn*...erm, sorry who’s Marco? Who are you?”. He wasn’t much help then in other words. The clips played out by Chris were really painful, uncomfortable, cringeworthy to listen to with Marco refusing to play along with any of Aled’s stupid questions. He refused to confirm he was gay (saying he wasn’t answering any personal questions), and he also didn’t have any message at all for Chris Moyles and the Radio One audience, even when Aled told him that they had been rooting for him all along. Yeah, rooting for him to be kicked out, the annoying chimp. The only good thing to be said about BB Aled’s return was the return of one of my favourite parts of the show - Chris and Dave messing about and making sarcastic comments while Aled takes his Big Brother bulletins dead seriously. Anyway, Nadia or Ahmed out next please. Thank you.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
JAMES a white van man from Richhill outside Portadown 2
RHYS an agricultural student from Camarthen 0
Daves Tedious Link
KLF 3AM Eternal - KLF stars Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty were not technically born in Scotland but are actually Scottish men, in the same way that a dog born in a stable is still a dog and not a horse - Horse hair is used to make violin bows - Bows of a different type are commonly found in the hair of girls - Girls Girls Girls was a 1987 hit for The Motley Crue, who’s drummer Tommy Lee is probably most famous for his relationship with Pamela Anderson - Pamela Anderson is mates with David Hasselhoff, who’s a big star in Germany - Germany will host the next World Cup in 2006 - If you add up the individual numbers that make up the numerical representation of 2006 you get 8 - 8 multiplied by 10 is 80, the amount of days it took Phileas Fogg to circumnavigate the world in a balloon - Another famous balloonist is Richard Branson, who also owns Virgin - The most famous virgin in the world is Mary, who apparently had a virgin birth even though this is medically very impossible - Mission Impossible was a film starring Tom Cruise, the former husband of Nicole Kidman, who is from Australia - Australia was the setting for the TV series A Town Called Alice - and if you add an “M” to A Town Called Alice you get “A Town Called Malice” - Which links us to The Jam and A Town Called Malice
JO WHILEY’S BIRTHDAY TREAT
(Jo’s card with her as Alan Smith - who has now left Leeds ironically)
Yesterday was Jo Whiley’s <s>39th</s> 30th birthday, with Chris calling her into the studio at three minutes to ten for her birthday treat. It wasn’t quite what she wanted though (him in a Spurs kit). However, Chris said he had had the Spurs logo tattooed on his bum and he bent over to reveal it (cue a collective chorus of “Nooo!!!” in the studio). He then presented Jo with a selection of birthday gifts - flowers and a hamper containing some coffee, jam, champagne and a birthday cake.
Jo - Did you get all of this free?
Chris - Nope, the cake we bought
(all laugh)
As well as the gifts there was of course the traditional birthday card, which contained a picture of Jo in a Leeds shirt. She laughed at it and said thanks but she really wanted Chris in a Spurs shirt, not a pic of herself in a Leeds one. Ah well, c’est la vie Jo.
RACHEL STEVENS ON THE SHOW TOMORROW
hubba bubba.
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=148303#148303">> Monday July 5th Show & Show Review - HAVE YOUR SAY!! <</A>
1. The Hives - Walk Idiot Walk 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. 50 Cent - In Da Club, 3. Snow Patrol - Spitting Games, 4. Joss Stone - Super Duper Love, 5. BUZZ OFF - All Saints - I Know Where It’s At, 6. The White Stripes - 7 Nation Army 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Scissor Sisters - Laura, 8. Mary J Blige - Family Affair, 9. Usher - Burn, 10. Blink 182 - I Miss You 8:00 NEWSBEAT 11. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 12. David Gray - Babylon, 13. Rachel Stevens - Some Girls 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Basement Jaxx - Where’s Your Head At, 15. Jamelia - See It In A Boy's Eyes, 16. Maroon 5 - This Love, 17. The Jam - A Town Called Malice (Tedious Link), 18. Mario Winans feat Enya & P. Diddy - I Don't Wanna Know, 19. Badly Drawn Boy - Year Of The Rat, 20. Lou Reed - Satellite Of Love (Dab Hands Remix) 9:30 NEWSBEAT 21. Destiny’s Child - Independent Women, 22. The Streets - Dry Your Eyes, 23. Nelly Furtado - Forca
Yep, today marks the six month mark for the team on Breakfast - who said they’d never make it? (I dunno actually...who did...). Anyway, Chris wasn’t going to let the landmark pass unmentioned on this his 119th breakfast show. Frequent Stevie Wonder choruses of “Happy Birthday To You” rang throughout the show, with lots of top celebrities on hand to pass on their messages of congratulation to Chris, Dave, Rachel and Aled. First up was *oooh Hollyoaks* Mr Vernon Kay from Bolton, who wished the team all the best and thanked Chris for helping him settle in at Radio One over the past six months (which now he has done and I think Vernon is sounding so much better for it). Vernon signed off his message by challenging Chris to another round of Euro 2004 X Box fun, with him promising to kick his arse this time (we’ve heard it all before Kay). Moyles accepted the challenge as he is the X Box daddy folks, don’t you forget that. Other happy half birthday messages came courtesy of Paul McKenna (crap), Shane Ritchie (sounded drunk), some weird opera singer and that crazy afternoon show host Mr Scott *good mornin’* Mills (live from his toilet). However, the <s>worst</s> best three messages undoubtedly came from ex Eastender Shaun Williamson, popular R’n’B songstress Javine...and erm, ex Hearsay member Kym Marsh. The last two clips were identically worded and 4 seconds long, making Chris think that perhaps they were reading a script, hmm. Well if they were, then Shaun certainly wasn’t - he lifted the words right off the page and said the following with such an overwhelming amount of passion...
Shaun - Happy anniversary Chris, Dave, Rachel and Aled - they’ve been on Breakfast six months and mornings have never sounded so good
(Dave laughs)
Dominic asked if the team were supposed to have brought in presents for one and other. Chris said yeah, he had a tenner to share between everyone. He then made sound effects as if he was ripping the note into five for a £2 slice each. Dom said he had a sheet of A4 with “happy birthday” written on it, Rach an apple for everyone, Aled some milk, Jules (who was back) a CD and Dave some of Rachel’s chapstick. Rock on. Chris said to celebrate six months on the Radio One Breakfast Show, he was going to choose a Buzz Off song from the year he joined Radio One (1997). It was such a disappointment in the end, as he went for I Know Where It’s At by All Saints (no.4 in Sep 97). I’m pretty sure it’s the first ever Buzz Off repeat play, and Dave has also used it on Tedious Link already this year. It’s a good tune but the response wasn’t too great in all honesty - first Rach got rid of it on 1:29, then the listeners buzzed it off second on 2:10, Dave followed in third on 2:14 and Aled brought up the rear (for a change) on 2:32. As I mentioned earlier, Juliette has returned from her two weeks in exile at Wimbledon and she said she had been feeling wet and damp. We’re glad she’s back too, but I think she was probably referring more to her time in the rain at the tennis. Jules was pleased to be back and didn’t believe Chris when he said that he hadn’t even spoken to the girl reading the sport in the last two weeks, Carol was it? Jules said she knew he had been talking to her as it said so on the unofficial Chris Moyles website (hello there). Well I am the voice of authority after all...*cough*. Chris said he’s missed the stink of booze and perfume in the studio for the past fortnight, no matter how hard Carrie tried. Plus Jules has bigger knockers than Carrie, so that’s always a bonus (if you pardon the expression). Chris continued the link but it quickly lost momentum...
Jules - Are you filling now?
Chris - No, I’m just pleased you’re back
(Dom and Dave laugh)
(Welcome back Juliette...and thanks for the kind of mention)
The main story in both this morning’s news and sport was Greece’s shock triumph at Euro 2004, with them beating Portugal 1-0 last night to claim the title. This was great news for Moyles, as you may remember he had Greece in the Radio One pub sweepstake, which he originally thought was a fix but is now more than delighted with. Steve Lamacq had Portugal so Chris said he’d no doubt be happy on Lamacq Live tonight, although mind you who can tell? Chris did his legendary Lamacq impression and somehow managed to get in the *loverly knockers* line, although it took a fair bit of setting up. Another happy soldier after last night’s result is of course bonafide Greek and potential Greek Olympiad Nemone, who was read out in a long list of other famous Greek stuff by Moyles before Buzz Off. The list included: Stelios from EasyJet, kebabs, moussaka, humus, Denis Roussos, John Travolta (Grease) and Dave’s mate Andy The Greek. Congratulations to one and all. Other sport making the headlines today was the news that Britain’s Miles Kasiri failed in his bid to become Britain's first Wimbledon boy's singles champion for 42 years, losing yesterday to France's Gael Monfils in straight sets. Miles is 18 and Chris suggested he cop off with Sharapova who’s only 17. If Miles isn’t interested in the offer then I most certainly am (and btw I’m not some old perv - I am actually 3 days younger than Sharapova). Thankfully Chris steered the conversation down a rather different course to that of Dave and Chappers on Saturday. He said “what a woman hubba hubba” and said that if he was going out with her he’d make her wear her tennis clobber all the time, cos she looks (extremely) fit in it. Dom scoffed and said it was probably worth pointing out that she is a very good tennis player too. Erm yeah Dom, she won it..
Chris - and she’s got cracking legs
(weather stab)
(a picture of Maria Sharapova in my review for definitely the last time...this week)
MOYLES @ EURODISNEY:
Chris - I took my girlfriend to Disneyland this weekend
Dom - Eurostar?
Chris - Thank you very much, and I paid for everything as well
(all laugh and Dave “guh huhs” into Johnny Vaughan jingle)
Chris said he really enjoyed himself at EuroDisney, despite the fact that it’s full of kids and French people, who don’t understand the concept of a queue. Chris said come to think of it, no one is as polite as us Brits when it comes to queuing.
Dave - We invented queuing (my quote of the day)
Chris and Sophie got the Eurostar first and then two trains in France, one to Lille and then another one on to EuroDisney in Paris. Chris made a point of praising the French train system and said that apart from the considerable price, there was nothing stopping the team all travelling out there after the show one morning. Rachel was up for the idea and she is the producer after all. Chris met all his favourite Disney stars yesterday - Minnie, the Chipmunks, Pinnochio, Goofy and Donald. He even admitted to getting his photo taken with both Mickey and Pluto, prompting Dave to call him sad...
Chris - no no no no
Dave - You’re 30 years old, what’s the matter with you man?
(Rachel laughs)
Chris - No shut up I’m 24, 24, 24 Dave
(hits Joss Stone vocal)
Chris refuted Dominic’s claim that the people who play Mickey etc are idiots, simply insisting that they were grown men dressed as big mice. Chris told the story of how his mate Longman got kicked out of DisneyLand in Florida for alcohol related offences, and was careful not to make the same mistake himself. He praised Space Mountain, Indiana Jones and the Aerosmith rock and rollercoaster ride, although he said Armageddon was a waste of time. He also said that the “it’s a small world ride” was highly racist and very offensive, despite Sophie’s claim that it was just cute kiddies singing. Chris said it was the most stereotypical stuff ever though - leprechauns for the Irish, bagpipes for the Scots, clogs for the Dutch, onions and stripy jumpers for the French and convict outfits for the Aussies. Hands across the water Chris.
SPORT RELIEF STUFF - JO BRAND LIVE ON THE PHONE:
The big push is on now. This Saturday is Sport Relief Saturday and all we are gonna hear about this week is Sport Relief unfortunately. I mean it’s charidee and a good cause and all that but it can get quite repetitive on the radio, especially with the text stuff. This was launched today btw - allowing you to sponsor either or both of Chris and Scott in their respective Moyles and Mills’ miles. All you need to do is send a text saying either Chris or Scott to 82125 (note the different number to usual). All texts are charged at £1 with 70p going to Sport Relief and the other 30p covering administrative costs. I can exclusively reveal (kind of) that at the end of Day 1 Chris has a huge 9077 votes to Scott’s 1367, raising so far a total (on his own) of nearly 7 grand so far (see the scores updated here). The plugging of this was only interrupted once - that by Chris being given out as an option for a question on GMTV. No matter how fast I flicked my TV onto ITV, I missed it (although Chris said the answer was c). Lorraine Kelly then re appeared on screen, causing a big discussion on her that slight devalued the whole Sport Relief thing. Plus when you think Sport Relief, you automatically think of that fitness guru Jo Brand, and that’s who was on the show this morning at 8:15 to talk about said event.
She was hilarious actually, much better than I’d expected. It’s well known that comedians and Chris don’t get on well on the whole, but she seems to be an exception (with “seems” the crucial word there). She said she was awake early by her standards today as she usually gets up just before Countdown, prompting an inquiry as to Richard Whiteley’s possible participation in this weekends events. Jo said she got involved with Sport Relief after being pinned to the wall and threatened with violence, as (and you may not believe this) running’s not really her thing. Chris told her about how he lost a load of weight a couple of years back and now has put it all back on again, to which she asked what time he is hoping to clock in the race on Saturday. He explained that there was a bit of a sob story to his race actually...
Jo - Pulled a muscle doing your trainer up did you?
Chris - No, my fathers quadruple heart bypass
Jo - Oh dear sorry...
(Chris and Dave laugh)
Jo - ...do send him my best
Chris explained how he is going to run the mile, run back to his dad and then walk the remainder with him. Jo wasn’t so sure that “running back” would be an option though, what with that coming after running a mile in the first place. Chris asked her if she never had a mobile fish & chip van in her area as a kid then. She said no she didn’t unfortunately, as she grew up in Kent. She said she is just hoping to finish the mile by Sunday afternoon, despite the fact she’s been training a bit. Chris reminded her that there’ll always be someone worse than her. She said she wasn’t so sure, especially if Whiteley’s not doing it. She gave maximum respect to Moyles for not having starting training yet, although he let her in on his secret plan to keep him going...
Chris - I’ve devised an attachment to my baseball cap - a stick and a packet of 20 Marlboro Lights hanging off the side. That should spur me on
Jo - Could you send me one of those with a bakewell tart on the end?
(Chris and Dave laugh)
Chris - Not a problem
Jo is running the race in Brighton on Saturday, with Chris, Will and Aled (BB press conference permitting) all in Leeds. Dave and Chappers will be on the Live Lounge treadmills at 1pm, with them programming no segway and a short record to start with, at least guaranteeing one link of them running while jogging. More details of the weekends events can of course be found @ http://www.sportrelief.com, where you can register too for the mile in your area (or outside your area). Registration fee is £7.50 not 6 quid, but you must register if you want to run. Clear? Good.
CHART UPDATE WITH WES:>>>>
(Listen Again To Th Official Chart with Wes Here)
Wes was on again for today’s chart check up, saying that he can’t believe it’s been six months now of him getting up every Monday morning at half seven. The commitment eh. Wes had a bit of a showbiz tale from his night out last night. He was at The Royal Albert Hall for one of Elton John’s celebrity bashes. He wasn’t personally invited but had contacts who’d got him in, and he had to go there all on his own (feeling understandably nervous). Ironically he was sat on the only table in the swanky after show dinner that Elton didn’t visit, leaving Wes next to some old lady - and when I say “lady” I mean as in a wife of a lord. He didn’t know who she was though, although for some reason she did get very excited when he told her that he worked for Radio One. On the table next to Wes last night was Liz Hurley, showing off her cleavage in a very lovely orange number. Wes said she is undoubtedly the most gorgeous woman he’s ever seen in his life, and he repeatedly called her amazing until Chris told him to calm down and stop it now.
Dave - Was Furnish there last night?
Wes - Who?
Dave - I said was Furnish there last night?
Wes - It was furnished there yes
Dave - No, was Furnish there? (Chris laughs)
Wes (realising) - Oh David Furnish?
(Chris and Rachel laugh)
What a pillock. Ready to give a run down on the state of the furnishing as well. If I were him I’d stick to the chart...and he did. Number one this week is Burn by Usher, which should be burnt. All copies of it in fact. Girls Aloud went in at 2 and Chocolate by Kylie at 6, which Dave and Chris thought a bit flattering for what they consider to be an album track. I was like that at first but it’s grown on me since. Wes couldn’t join in any of these discussions though, as he has to remain impartial remember. Ah well, it never stopped Jo Whiley when she did the chart a couple of years back did it (that'll test your memories).
BB ALED IS BACK <s>(OH GOD)</s> (JOY!):>>>>
Tis true, he finally returned at 9:20 this morning to give the results from Marco’s press conference on Saturday. It remains to be seen whether he’ll be on every day, but I suspect it’ll just be every Monday and Friday. Marco’s press conference was moved to Saturday morning because the police wanted to talk to him on Friday night, so Aled had to get up bright and early to be there on time. Chris said that he heard Aled also woke Dominic up at about 20 past 8 that morning...
Dom - Yeah he did, Saturday morning
Chris - What, did he give you a nudge?
(all laugh)
Dom - No I wasn’t sleeping next to Aled...
Chris - Right
Dom - ...obviously (all continue to laugh)
The mobile actually went off, with Aled on the other end asking Dom if he had any questions for him to ask Marco. I believe Dom’s reply went something along the lines of “er, sorry *yawn* no it’s fine, fine, I was already up, right questions for Marco *yawn*...erm, sorry who’s Marco? Who are you?”. He wasn’t much help then in other words. The clips played out by Chris were really painful, uncomfortable, cringeworthy to listen to with Marco refusing to play along with any of Aled’s stupid questions. He refused to confirm he was gay (saying he wasn’t answering any personal questions), and he also didn’t have any message at all for Chris Moyles and the Radio One audience, even when Aled told him that they had been rooting for him all along. Yeah, rooting for him to be kicked out, the annoying chimp. The only good thing to be said about BB Aled’s return was the return of one of my favourite parts of the show - Chris and Dave messing about and making sarcastic comments while Aled takes his Big Brother bulletins dead seriously. Anyway, Nadia or Ahmed out next please. Thank you.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
JAMES a white van man from Richhill outside Portadown 2
RHYS an agricultural student from Camarthen 0
Daves Tedious Link
KLF 3AM Eternal - KLF stars Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty were not technically born in Scotland but are actually Scottish men, in the same way that a dog born in a stable is still a dog and not a horse - Horse hair is used to make violin bows - Bows of a different type are commonly found in the hair of girls - Girls Girls Girls was a 1987 hit for The Motley Crue, who’s drummer Tommy Lee is probably most famous for his relationship with Pamela Anderson - Pamela Anderson is mates with David Hasselhoff, who’s a big star in Germany - Germany will host the next World Cup in 2006 - If you add up the individual numbers that make up the numerical representation of 2006 you get 8 - 8 multiplied by 10 is 80, the amount of days it took Phileas Fogg to circumnavigate the world in a balloon - Another famous balloonist is Richard Branson, who also owns Virgin - The most famous virgin in the world is Mary, who apparently had a virgin birth even though this is medically very impossible - Mission Impossible was a film starring Tom Cruise, the former husband of Nicole Kidman, who is from Australia - Australia was the setting for the TV series A Town Called Alice - and if you add an “M” to A Town Called Alice you get “A Town Called Malice” - Which links us to The Jam and A Town Called Malice
JO WHILEY’S BIRTHDAY TREAT
(Jo’s card with her as Alan Smith - who has now left Leeds ironically)
Yesterday was Jo Whiley’s <s>39th</s> 30th birthday, with Chris calling her into the studio at three minutes to ten for her birthday treat. It wasn’t quite what she wanted though (him in a Spurs kit). However, Chris said he had had the Spurs logo tattooed on his bum and he bent over to reveal it (cue a collective chorus of “Nooo!!!” in the studio). He then presented Jo with a selection of birthday gifts - flowers and a hamper containing some coffee, jam, champagne and a birthday cake.
Jo - Did you get all of this free?
Chris - Nope, the cake we bought
(all laugh)
As well as the gifts there was of course the traditional birthday card, which contained a picture of Jo in a Leeds shirt. She laughed at it and said thanks but she really wanted Chris in a Spurs shirt, not a pic of herself in a Leeds one. Ah well, c’est la vie Jo.
RACHEL STEVENS ON THE SHOW TOMORROW
hubba bubba.
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=148303#148303">> Monday July 5th Show & Show Review - HAVE YOUR SAY!! <</A>
