chrismoyles.net
- Tue Apr 16, 2002 6:11 pm
#241417
Will is back in the studio today but hasnt a tan. He explains that there were storms in LA and it was too hot to go out in Vegas. Chris asks him about his friendship with the Chemical Bros and then proceeds to play a clip where they ask them if they know of a Will Kinder. They reply with a definite no and when told he was Zoe Balls producer on the breakfast show, they said they might have been introduced but they wouldnt know what he looked like. Chris still has the hots for Pink though he says its because she looks slightly common, the sort of person who would have a sister called Hazel or Tanya. Dave doesnt fancy Pink and says she looks a bit rough.
Chris played clips from yesterdays Steve Wright show after Daves uncle rang him last night to talk about him. Read yesterdays review for the information. They played the whole clip and then went to live Steve Wright just to listen in and lo and behold the same person was on. Chris went to the magic foot doctor this morning and they made a mould of his feet so that they can give him special impliments designed especially for his feet. He has no arch in his foot so he finds running difficult. Chris went out last night to the cinema with Jon Culshaw again. They wanted to see Oceans 11 but it wasnt on at a time that suited. Jon requested A Beautiful Mind but Chris wasnt keen so saw K-Pax with Kevin Spacey and said lets go to that instead. They were in the queue about to get the tickets for K-Pax when Jon whispered he would prefer to see A Beautiful Mind so they went and seen it. Chris said it was dull and should have seen the Arnie film instead. Chris talks about how A Beautiful Mind is based on a true story but he wants to know how much of it is true and how much is based ie made up. Chris talks about the film Castaway and how he thought that was a true story until he saw the DVD extras where the producer said it wasnt. Dave then loses track of thought:
Dave - but you know links on again cos the Carling Black Label advert is based on Castaway
Chris - what
Dave - you know the one with the crab
Chris - no its not
Dave - yes it is because hes on the island
Chris - so
Will - the basic castaway story is on treasure island
Chris - dave, we live on an island you pillock
Dave - but the similatrities are ...
Chris - ok, what are the similarities dave between the Carling advert and the film Castaway?
Dave - ok guy gets washed up on a beach
Chris - yeah but pretty much every island story is like that
Dave - aahh but in the movie Castaway he has a best friend, its Wilson the volleyball, the Carling ad its a crab
Chris - dave he kinda goes a bit mad and makes friends with a football that he draws a face on and calls Wilson, right in the Carling advert he befriends a crab
Dave - granted the bit about the fridge is a bit far fetched
Chris - he gets the crab to get the fridge working so he can get Carling
Dave - but there are clear similarities
Chris - (SHOUTS) That never happens in Castaway, id love to know what goes in your head Dave.
Chris has some insider information about a couple of Tv presenters but doesnt know whether to reveal it. They basically just tell the stories and doesnt name the people although it becomes slightly apparant that its Richard & Judy*. Chris was talking to someone who used to work with these said presenters.
Chris : I know this to be fact because its a very good source
Dave : So its a famous person
Will : I think we should keep the names secret
Chris : I can tell you the story but you are gonna guess who they ARE (FIRST CLUE 2 PPL)
Dave : Is it broadcastable?
Chris : Yeah, ok but if i dont say their names everything will be watertight ok. I was talking to a guy who used to work on a tv show and the person was telling me what it was like to work on the programme. I asked did you enjoy working on it and he said no it was horrible, the people who present the show are horrible, temper tantrums the whole works, drink everything, mood swings, a nightmare. So I says to him you got to tell us some stories and he told stories about them. The show is so screwed up nobody dares talk back to these presenters, nobody dares to give as good as they get. Stories about people getting slapped across the face by the editor. Stories like you need to ask their permission if you wish to speak to them on the talkback and if they dont reply that means you cant talk to them. stories about they have a personal chef hired and paid for by the television company to make meals at their request that they never eat because they are very busy so they either take them home or they take them upstairs because there is a flat above the studio where they are allowed to eat. they have a flat paid for. the reason why is that they dont want to drive through rush hour traffic. Are these good stories, can you figure out who they are?
Will & Dave - Yes, we think its fairly obvious
Chris - im not gonna tell the next story ok heres the story. one of these presenters who there have been many rumours in the past about but very little has been proved. and you know what people are like, they cover things up. apparantly one day on the set of the show, one of these presenters during the link, im gonna take the microphones off, (one of these presenters suddenly out of the blue WET THEMSELVES and had to be excused and said they had too much water to drink and didnt want to go to the toilet through the show but this has happened on numerous occasions, midlink all of a sudden they will pish themselves.
Dave - There used to be a girl that sat next to me who used to that on a regular basis
Chris - and its not allowed to be mentioned but its bizarre
Dave - but its funny also all the crew watching this, they must be wetting themselves too laughing.
Chris - so anyway i didnt say any names but i dont think they wont be coming on as guests on the show
LATER ON
Chris - More new stories about them being very similar. Apparently these presenters had private loos which only they could use but none of the staff members could. their loo was further down the corridor. so what the staff used to do was to do a number 2 in it and not flush the chain on purpose hence when the presenter walked in there, he found a great big Richard the Turd in there.
Will does a guess who he had dinner with on the team. It was Kelly Brook. But the problem being that he hardly spoke to her and it was a huge table of 8. Will had made a Big Gay Al-Esque jingle. He says that she couldnt remember who Chris was. He badmouths her first and then realises that Will probably was an arse and forgives her. Chris has a England World Cup record to play which he describes beforehand as awful. He isnt lying either as it is appalling DJ Otzi Hey Baby with slighly changed lyrics. Chris reminds everyone that this is an Austrian doing an England record. Chris says that it shouldnt be called music. It is out on May 25th. DO NOT BUY THIS CRAP. Dave rates it on a scale of 1-10 of muck as 9. Remember Hitler was Austrian.
* it may not be these people, ok
Chris played clips from yesterdays Steve Wright show after Daves uncle rang him last night to talk about him. Read yesterdays review for the information. They played the whole clip and then went to live Steve Wright just to listen in and lo and behold the same person was on. Chris went to the magic foot doctor this morning and they made a mould of his feet so that they can give him special impliments designed especially for his feet. He has no arch in his foot so he finds running difficult. Chris went out last night to the cinema with Jon Culshaw again. They wanted to see Oceans 11 but it wasnt on at a time that suited. Jon requested A Beautiful Mind but Chris wasnt keen so saw K-Pax with Kevin Spacey and said lets go to that instead. They were in the queue about to get the tickets for K-Pax when Jon whispered he would prefer to see A Beautiful Mind so they went and seen it. Chris said it was dull and should have seen the Arnie film instead. Chris talks about how A Beautiful Mind is based on a true story but he wants to know how much of it is true and how much is based ie made up. Chris talks about the film Castaway and how he thought that was a true story until he saw the DVD extras where the producer said it wasnt. Dave then loses track of thought:
Dave - but you know links on again cos the Carling Black Label advert is based on Castaway
Chris - what
Dave - you know the one with the crab
Chris - no its not
Dave - yes it is because hes on the island
Chris - so
Will - the basic castaway story is on treasure island
Chris - dave, we live on an island you pillock
Dave - but the similatrities are ...
Chris - ok, what are the similarities dave between the Carling advert and the film Castaway?
Dave - ok guy gets washed up on a beach
Chris - yeah but pretty much every island story is like that
Dave - aahh but in the movie Castaway he has a best friend, its Wilson the volleyball, the Carling ad its a crab
Chris - dave he kinda goes a bit mad and makes friends with a football that he draws a face on and calls Wilson, right in the Carling advert he befriends a crab
Dave - granted the bit about the fridge is a bit far fetched
Chris - he gets the crab to get the fridge working so he can get Carling
Dave - but there are clear similarities
Chris - (SHOUTS) That never happens in Castaway, id love to know what goes in your head Dave.
Chris has some insider information about a couple of Tv presenters but doesnt know whether to reveal it. They basically just tell the stories and doesnt name the people although it becomes slightly apparant that its Richard & Judy*. Chris was talking to someone who used to work with these said presenters.
Chris : I know this to be fact because its a very good source
Dave : So its a famous person
Will : I think we should keep the names secret
Chris : I can tell you the story but you are gonna guess who they ARE (FIRST CLUE 2 PPL)
Dave : Is it broadcastable?
Chris : Yeah, ok but if i dont say their names everything will be watertight ok. I was talking to a guy who used to work on a tv show and the person was telling me what it was like to work on the programme. I asked did you enjoy working on it and he said no it was horrible, the people who present the show are horrible, temper tantrums the whole works, drink everything, mood swings, a nightmare. So I says to him you got to tell us some stories and he told stories about them. The show is so screwed up nobody dares talk back to these presenters, nobody dares to give as good as they get. Stories about people getting slapped across the face by the editor. Stories like you need to ask their permission if you wish to speak to them on the talkback and if they dont reply that means you cant talk to them. stories about they have a personal chef hired and paid for by the television company to make meals at their request that they never eat because they are very busy so they either take them home or they take them upstairs because there is a flat above the studio where they are allowed to eat. they have a flat paid for. the reason why is that they dont want to drive through rush hour traffic. Are these good stories, can you figure out who they are?
Will & Dave - Yes, we think its fairly obvious
Chris - im not gonna tell the next story ok heres the story. one of these presenters who there have been many rumours in the past about but very little has been proved. and you know what people are like, they cover things up. apparantly one day on the set of the show, one of these presenters during the link, im gonna take the microphones off, (one of these presenters suddenly out of the blue WET THEMSELVES and had to be excused and said they had too much water to drink and didnt want to go to the toilet through the show but this has happened on numerous occasions, midlink all of a sudden they will pish themselves.
Dave - There used to be a girl that sat next to me who used to that on a regular basis
Chris - and its not allowed to be mentioned but its bizarre
Dave - but its funny also all the crew watching this, they must be wetting themselves too laughing.
Chris - so anyway i didnt say any names but i dont think they wont be coming on as guests on the show
LATER ON
Chris - More new stories about them being very similar. Apparently these presenters had private loos which only they could use but none of the staff members could. their loo was further down the corridor. so what the staff used to do was to do a number 2 in it and not flush the chain on purpose hence when the presenter walked in there, he found a great big Richard the Turd in there.
Will does a guess who he had dinner with on the team. It was Kelly Brook. But the problem being that he hardly spoke to her and it was a huge table of 8. Will had made a Big Gay Al-Esque jingle. He says that she couldnt remember who Chris was. He badmouths her first and then realises that Will probably was an arse and forgives her. Chris has a England World Cup record to play which he describes beforehand as awful. He isnt lying either as it is appalling DJ Otzi Hey Baby with slighly changed lyrics. Chris reminds everyone that this is an Austrian doing an England record. Chris says that it shouldnt be called music. It is out on May 25th. DO NOT BUY THIS CRAP. Dave rates it on a scale of 1-10 of muck as 9. Remember Hitler was Austrian.
* it may not be these people, ok
