chrismoyles.net
- Tue May 06, 2003 7:06 pm
#241686
Only Will and Aled attended training today. Chris didn't have an excuse for his absence, however Scott has drawn up a new training schedule for him which was supposed to start today. Chris said Scott's going to update the schedule and they'll start it next week. The team are travelling up to Sheffield tonight and Chris appealed for listeners to recommend good pubs that is not too picky and will let them in with trainers. Aled said that tonight's the night that he's going to introduce them to Woo-Woos. Chris commented that van drivers will be careering of the road in Sheffield now they've been informed that they sell Woo-woos there.
I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here update with Tony Blackburn: Anthony was moaning about his bush-tucker trial because he said he didn't have enough time. Ant and Dec nicknamed Anthony the Rebel Without A Clue. The celebrities were expecting John Fashanu to be the first person out, so they were all surprised when it was Sian. Tony thinks Phil Tuffnell will win it, because he's the only one who isn't complaining about the lack of food. The team had an exciting new hilarious feature: 'Where in the World'. Will has to try and guess the location of out famous places such as The Crucible, Meadowhall Shopping Centre, the birthplace of Jarvis and Joe * and the place where 'The Full Monty' was filmed.
If you haven't guessed already then all these places are associated with Sheffield. Chris and Dave read these places out and the 'hilarious' thing about this feature is that Will gets it wrong every time. They ended with Huey Lewis to which Will replied This is a trick question... Sheffield. It was New York.
I thought Chris was joking when he said today we have the girl back on from yesterday for Viaduct. Unfortunately she was back, Fick Fiona, oh dear oh dear, that boyfriend of hers must be easily pleased, probably met her at Dyslexics Anonymous or something. If you thought it couldnt get worse, lets go into transcript mode
Chris - This is the common abbreviation for a public house.
Fi - Boozer.
Chris - This is where students hang out, 10 letters starts with U.
Matt - Pub.
Chris - This is an annual event where longhairs get together on a muddy field in Somerset to see who can avoid soap for the longest?
Fi - Help... Help, U? Help, U what, I dont understand that question can you repeat it please?
Chris - Ok, your question was where students hang out, 10 letters starts with U?
Fi - Is that a Youth Wing, I dunno!
Chris - A Youth Wing!
(Dave and Will start uncontrollably chuckling in the background)
Fi - Well it begins with U, a unit, <shouts> UNION! UNION!
Chris - Ahh 10 letters, Union is it, its ok im not going to have a go at you today because it is a very difficult question (quite obviously taking the piss)...
Fi - University!!!
Dave and Chris - Whoooooooooooaaaaaaa, back of the net
Chris - Yeah, thats a hard one I know, where students hang out, begins with U?
Fi - But they dont hang out there, they work, study, they dont hang out.
Chris - Yeah they are there for 3 years or more and they dont hang out there, they dont live there the first year
Fi - Well they dont actually live in the university, do they?
Chris - They usually live at the University.
Fi - They live in halls of residence...
Dave - which are owned by the university.
Fi - Oh come on.
Chris - Well it wasnt going to be campus, union or flat, so unfortunately we have run out of time for todays game which leaves us in a bit of a quandry because Matt was unsure of the Phil Tufnell one but he got there in the end.
Matt - I got it quicker than she got hers.
Fi - No you didnt!
Matt - Definitely did
Chris - To be fair he did Fiona, however you know she had a very difficult question (I can sense the eyes looking up to the clouds). Whats a Youth Wing by the way Fiona and how do you spell it?
Fi - Yeah I know but I didnt know cos you got the spelling wrong.
Matt- Oh come on.
Chris - Yeah cos Dave you might have spelt Youth with a U.
Fi - Well yesterday you spelt cough wrong, you spelt it cuff.
Dave - No cough.
Fi - Well Aled spelt it to me cuff.
Chris - Aled, did you misspell that for her yesterday? Now Im know who im likely to believe in this situation today I must admit.
Aled - Well I had it out in front of me and I would have read it out as it was written on the page so Id be surprised if I misread it.
Matt - He was very precise with my answers when he gave me mine.
Fi - Well he would have been, wouldnt he have Matt?
Chris - Oh.
Dave - This is great.
Chris - They are like a bloody married couple. Hang on Matt, without interruption from Fiona, explain why you should be champion today to go on to tomorrow?
Matt - The reason why I should be champion is that yesterday she absolutely ballsed it up beyond all compare and she even had the answers and she still ballsed it up. Yesterday I won, no problem, today I won, small problem but not as big as hers and also I deserve to win because you didnt even tell me what I won yesterday.
Chris - Right ok, cos noone won thats why!
Matt - I won.
Chris - Oh right, I suppose you did, ahm Fiona tell us why you should win?
Fi - Umm, plenty of reasons, I have to listen, um umm, excuse me Matt
<Matt sniggering>
Chris - Fiona tell us why you should win?
Fi - Well im a gorgeous girl (find that hard to believe but anyways) and Matt lives in a measley village.
Matt - Its a lovely village, its a town actually.
Fi - Its a village.
Matt - No, its a town.
Chris - This is like being on one of them... chatrooms.
Dave - (astounded) This is like Sub Local Radio.
Will and Chris laughing
Dave - Its a village, its a town, its got a steeple WHO CARES!
Chris - Do you know, because you were stuck on the word university and thought that youth wing began with a U.
Matt - Oh no, tell me your not going to let her win.
Chris - Youve got to give it to her, she is fantastic entertainment and God bless her, she doesnt realise it but she is and I have to be brutally honest, callers that are this thick are very hard to find these days
Matt - Yes, but does that warrant winning a game?
Chris - Ill tell you what it does warrant, it warrants the pair of you coming back again tomorrow to battle it out one more time
Dave - Not tommorrow, Thursday, not doing it tommorrow cos were in Sheffield.
Matt - Have I won anything yet?
Chris - Just Radio recognition although Fiona has won lots of money.
Fi - Oh yes.
Chris - No im only joking.
Fi - Ive won a Radio 1 baseball cap.
Chris - Your not gonna get anything love at this rate.
Fi - Excuse me?
Chris (angry fit) Well you havent WON, youve ballsed it up TWICE and youve only been on TWO days. Im giving you the chance to come on again on Thursday!
Fi - And im gonna be there
Chris - Yeah, in body but maybe not in mind, good luck, get brushing up on your IQ. By the way did you watch that Test The Nation the other night
Fi - No it was boring.
Chris - Trouble working the telly...
Kerin won the Justin Timberlake competition. She was highly annoying as she kept squealing, its only a pop star shes meeting, he wont be heard of in 5 years time. The other 4 however got tickets to go and see.
Daves Tedious Link
The Clash Should I Stay Or Should I Go - Clash rhymes with Cash as in Craig Cash who played Dave in the Royle Family - The Royle Family was a creation of Caroline Aherne who was also responsible for Mrs Merton - Mrs Merton shares the surname with Paul Merton who is a team captain on Have I Got News For You - HIGNFY recently featured Martin Clunes as guest host who now looks favourite to land the job full time - Full Time is the opposite of part time as in Part Time Lover which was a hit for Stevie Wonder - Stevie Wonder shouldnt be mistaken for Golden Wonder who make crisps - Crisps come in many different flavours as does yoghurt - Yoghurt rhymes with Froggatt as in Steve Froggratt who used to play for Villa - A Villa is a house in Spain - Beaches in Spain are called Playas and when you think of the word playa and the world of US Urban Rap, you dont get much bigger playas than ladies favourite and love phenomenom LL Cool J - Which links us to LL Cool J and Phenomenom
I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here update with Tony Blackburn: Anthony was moaning about his bush-tucker trial because he said he didn't have enough time. Ant and Dec nicknamed Anthony the Rebel Without A Clue. The celebrities were expecting John Fashanu to be the first person out, so they were all surprised when it was Sian. Tony thinks Phil Tuffnell will win it, because he's the only one who isn't complaining about the lack of food. The team had an exciting new hilarious feature: 'Where in the World'. Will has to try and guess the location of out famous places such as The Crucible, Meadowhall Shopping Centre, the birthplace of Jarvis and Joe * and the place where 'The Full Monty' was filmed.
If you haven't guessed already then all these places are associated with Sheffield. Chris and Dave read these places out and the 'hilarious' thing about this feature is that Will gets it wrong every time. They ended with Huey Lewis to which Will replied This is a trick question... Sheffield. It was New York.
I thought Chris was joking when he said today we have the girl back on from yesterday for Viaduct. Unfortunately she was back, Fick Fiona, oh dear oh dear, that boyfriend of hers must be easily pleased, probably met her at Dyslexics Anonymous or something. If you thought it couldnt get worse, lets go into transcript mode
Chris - This is the common abbreviation for a public house.
Fi - Boozer.
Chris - This is where students hang out, 10 letters starts with U.
Matt - Pub.
Chris - This is an annual event where longhairs get together on a muddy field in Somerset to see who can avoid soap for the longest?
Fi - Help... Help, U? Help, U what, I dont understand that question can you repeat it please?
Chris - Ok, your question was where students hang out, 10 letters starts with U?
Fi - Is that a Youth Wing, I dunno!
Chris - A Youth Wing!
(Dave and Will start uncontrollably chuckling in the background)
Fi - Well it begins with U, a unit, <shouts> UNION! UNION!
Chris - Ahh 10 letters, Union is it, its ok im not going to have a go at you today because it is a very difficult question (quite obviously taking the piss)...
Fi - University!!!
Dave and Chris - Whoooooooooooaaaaaaa, back of the net
Chris - Yeah, thats a hard one I know, where students hang out, begins with U?
Fi - But they dont hang out there, they work, study, they dont hang out.
Chris - Yeah they are there for 3 years or more and they dont hang out there, they dont live there the first year
Fi - Well they dont actually live in the university, do they?
Chris - They usually live at the University.
Fi - They live in halls of residence...
Dave - which are owned by the university.
Fi - Oh come on.
Chris - Well it wasnt going to be campus, union or flat, so unfortunately we have run out of time for todays game which leaves us in a bit of a quandry because Matt was unsure of the Phil Tufnell one but he got there in the end.
Matt - I got it quicker than she got hers.
Fi - No you didnt!
Matt - Definitely did
Chris - To be fair he did Fiona, however you know she had a very difficult question (I can sense the eyes looking up to the clouds). Whats a Youth Wing by the way Fiona and how do you spell it?
Fi - Yeah I know but I didnt know cos you got the spelling wrong.
Matt- Oh come on.
Chris - Yeah cos Dave you might have spelt Youth with a U.
Fi - Well yesterday you spelt cough wrong, you spelt it cuff.
Dave - No cough.
Fi - Well Aled spelt it to me cuff.
Chris - Aled, did you misspell that for her yesterday? Now Im know who im likely to believe in this situation today I must admit.
Aled - Well I had it out in front of me and I would have read it out as it was written on the page so Id be surprised if I misread it.
Matt - He was very precise with my answers when he gave me mine.
Fi - Well he would have been, wouldnt he have Matt?
Chris - Oh.
Dave - This is great.
Chris - They are like a bloody married couple. Hang on Matt, without interruption from Fiona, explain why you should be champion today to go on to tomorrow?
Matt - The reason why I should be champion is that yesterday she absolutely ballsed it up beyond all compare and she even had the answers and she still ballsed it up. Yesterday I won, no problem, today I won, small problem but not as big as hers and also I deserve to win because you didnt even tell me what I won yesterday.
Chris - Right ok, cos noone won thats why!
Matt - I won.
Chris - Oh right, I suppose you did, ahm Fiona tell us why you should win?
Fi - Umm, plenty of reasons, I have to listen, um umm, excuse me Matt
<Matt sniggering>
Chris - Fiona tell us why you should win?
Fi - Well im a gorgeous girl (find that hard to believe but anyways) and Matt lives in a measley village.
Matt - Its a lovely village, its a town actually.
Fi - Its a village.
Matt - No, its a town.
Chris - This is like being on one of them... chatrooms.
Dave - (astounded) This is like Sub Local Radio.
Will and Chris laughing
Dave - Its a village, its a town, its got a steeple WHO CARES!
Chris - Do you know, because you were stuck on the word university and thought that youth wing began with a U.
Matt - Oh no, tell me your not going to let her win.
Chris - Youve got to give it to her, she is fantastic entertainment and God bless her, she doesnt realise it but she is and I have to be brutally honest, callers that are this thick are very hard to find these days
Matt - Yes, but does that warrant winning a game?
Chris - Ill tell you what it does warrant, it warrants the pair of you coming back again tomorrow to battle it out one more time
Dave - Not tommorrow, Thursday, not doing it tommorrow cos were in Sheffield.
Matt - Have I won anything yet?
Chris - Just Radio recognition although Fiona has won lots of money.
Fi - Oh yes.
Chris - No im only joking.
Fi - Ive won a Radio 1 baseball cap.
Chris - Your not gonna get anything love at this rate.
Fi - Excuse me?
Chris (angry fit) Well you havent WON, youve ballsed it up TWICE and youve only been on TWO days. Im giving you the chance to come on again on Thursday!
Fi - And im gonna be there
Chris - Yeah, in body but maybe not in mind, good luck, get brushing up on your IQ. By the way did you watch that Test The Nation the other night
Fi - No it was boring.
Chris - Trouble working the telly...
Kerin won the Justin Timberlake competition. She was highly annoying as she kept squealing, its only a pop star shes meeting, he wont be heard of in 5 years time. The other 4 however got tickets to go and see.
Daves Tedious Link
The Clash Should I Stay Or Should I Go - Clash rhymes with Cash as in Craig Cash who played Dave in the Royle Family - The Royle Family was a creation of Caroline Aherne who was also responsible for Mrs Merton - Mrs Merton shares the surname with Paul Merton who is a team captain on Have I Got News For You - HIGNFY recently featured Martin Clunes as guest host who now looks favourite to land the job full time - Full Time is the opposite of part time as in Part Time Lover which was a hit for Stevie Wonder - Stevie Wonder shouldnt be mistaken for Golden Wonder who make crisps - Crisps come in many different flavours as does yoghurt - Yoghurt rhymes with Froggatt as in Steve Froggratt who used to play for Villa - A Villa is a house in Spain - Beaches in Spain are called Playas and when you think of the word playa and the world of US Urban Rap, you dont get much bigger playas than ladies favourite and love phenomenom LL Cool J - Which links us to LL Cool J and Phenomenom
