chrismoyles.net
- Fri Jul 09, 2004 2:52 pm
#241966
1. Lee Cabrera feat Alex Cartana - Shake It (Move A Little Closer) 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Maroon 5 - This Love, 3. Usher - Burn, 4. Razorlight - Golden Touch, 5. BUZZ OFF - Happy Mondays - Step On, 6. The Black Eyed Peas - Let's Get It Started 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 8. Eve feat Gwen Stefani - Let Me Blow Ya Mind, 9. McFly - Obviously 8:00 NEWSBEAT 10. Stereophonics - Have A Nice Day, 11. Jamelia - See It In A Boy's Eyes, 12. Avril Lavigne - My Happy Ending, 13. York - O.T.B (On The Beach) 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Lou Reed - Satellite Of Love (Dab Hands Remix), 15. Nelly & Kelly - Dilemma, 16. Pink feat William Orbit - Feel Good Time, 17. Nomad - (I Wanna Give You) Devotion (Tedious Link), 18. Kelis - Trick Me, 19. Busted - Thunderbirds Are Go, 20. The Ordinary Boys - Talk Talk Talk 9:30 NEWSBEAT 21. Outkast - Roses, 22. Bhangra Nights Vs Husan - Bhangra Nights, 23. Blink 182 - I Miss You
Some bad news to begin with then today - Dave was sober. Damn it. He stayed off the booze last night at Chris’s house as he was driving, although in a strange reversal of roles his wife Emma nearly got bladdered, just deciding against it as she has a big day at work today. With just a day to go until The Moyles Mile in Leeds, Chris finally got in a bit of training yesterday afternoon. He did an hour and a quarters worth of work out with his new personal trainer, including some step, some weights, a run, some squat things, some more weights, some press ups, some sit ups and finally some crunches. He said he was aching badly this morning. Rachel despite her not running the mile went swimming last night, although Dave said she was more of a Mark Radcliffe than a Paula Radcliffe. Dave and Chappers will be on the treadmills tomorrow from 1 don’t forget, with Aled supposedly joining Chris to run in Leeds and Dom and Jules as yet unsure of what they’re doing. Dom (who was bathing his boy when Chris rang him yesterday...and that’s not a euphemism) is now thinking he’ll run, although Juliette was toying with the idea of going to watch Port Vale instead in a pre season friendly. Chris said she wasn’t really, she’s just a lazy tart who wasn’t sponsoring him to save up some money for a bottle of Blue Nun. She didn’t disagree. The Greyhead trails about Chris’s dad were also repeated again today, with Dave saying that the Hovis bed reminded him of bicycles, loaves and cobbled streets. Yep, thanks for that Dave. Chris also replayed his Sport Relief celebrity messages at the top of the show, including two new ones recorded by Jon Culshaw as Trevor McDonald and George W Bush. The Bush one was the funniest, with him urging all English people to text their supportification in for Larry Moyles in the kilometre race across the state of Ohio, Leeds. Chris said that he was doing something very special to do with Sport Relief later this morning, and revealed that he’d be re appearing on Jo Whiley’s show after 11 o’clock with a special celebrity guest. He revealed that he’d be on Radio One, but not at Radio One...the plot thickens eh. Chris was all smartly dressed up for the occasion in proper pants and a funky t shirt, and he told people not to switch over to their local radio top ten at ten when Jo came on today, instead urging them to sit back and enjoy Jo’s first hour of music, entertainment and chat. I can honestly say that I’ve got no idea what Chris’s mystery mission is, but if it is any good then I’ll include it in a special review outside of this particular entry. Buzz Off this morning was a classic. That is a word overused by myself but on this occasion I do mean it, as the song Chris chose should go down as one of the greatest records of all time (let alone the last 20 years as Chris said). It was of course Step On by The Happy Mondays, number 5 back 14 and a bit years ago in April 1990. 82% of the audience voted Buzz On, Aled buzzed on 3:13 wanting a shorter edit, Dave was next on 5:03 and Rach last on 5:04. Chris said that listening back to that made him want to kiss Shaun Ryder on the face (ok now I wouldn’t go that far), adding that he should be knighted for that one track alone. I know Chris commented in Shaun’s book and everything but I think even he has to admit that he’s just a mess nowadays (as that BBC3 series proved).
SPORT RELIEF THE FINAL PUSH - SCOTT MILLS LIVE ON THE PHONE:>>>>
*good mornin*
Scott was live on the phone from Mills Mansion after half seven, completing the weeks line up of “celebrity” Sport Relief guests on Breakfast. Scott was up and out of bed and had a fag on the go already, saying that he’ll be needing a few more of those tomorrow afternoon. He plans to run when the TV Cameras are on him on Grandstand, and then walk the rest. Kate Lawler will apparently be joining him to run though, and she’s quite fit (in more ways than one). Dave asked Scott if he considered himself to be Southampton’s biggest celebrity. He said outside of Craig David and Chris Packham from The Really Really Wild Show, undoubtedly. Scott’s preparations for The Mills Mile haven’t been the best, as he hasn’t started training yet and is gigging tonight on his Sex Tour in Reading. He’s on stage about midnight and is relying on a sober driver to wake him up and drive him to Southampton in the morning. This driver won’t be his totally straight comedian flat mate who has now retired (I presume this has been mentioned on his afternoon show or summat), and Chris told Scott to walk into his room live on the air and ask him to consider coming out of retirement for one more gig. He did so and he agreed, which Chris said would make another weeks worth of material for Scott. Scott said it wasn’t some sort of elaborate joke and he doesn’t actually want his flat mate to fail, instead encouraging Comedy Dave to write some gags for him. Dave said he might do, although Chris said he had a cracking knock knock joke to start him off:
Chris - Knock knock
Scott (rather reluctantly) - Who’s there?
Chris - I dunup
Scott (laughs loudly) - I dunupwho
It’s a gooden. Chris wanted to check Scott was all ready for tomorrow. He said he thought so, although he was unsure about one piece of (kind of) important information...
Scott - What time’s the race?
Dave - One
Chris (laughs) - Jesus, one o’clock Scott
(Scott & Chris laugh) Scott - Ok, right
Scott said yep he had his Sport Relief t-shirt and sweat bands ready, although Jo Whiley wants him to run it in lycra. In fact he even dressed up in it for her and had some shots taken for Radio One Online, which you can see here:
Comedy Dave said he found the Dirty Den sucking pose not “apt” but disturbing, and Scott said he also found Jo’s fascination with cupping his breasts quite weird too. Moyles said he’d noticed that Jo herself wasn’t actually running the mile, although it’s understandable with her arthritis kicking in and all that. Scott suggested she do the mile in a zimmer frame and called her the new June Whitfield. He also said that if she didn’t have her zimmer frame, she could always do it in her walking bath...
Dave - or she could do it in one of those sort of shop mobility buggies
(Scott laughs)
SPUNKY SCOTT AND THE ALED INBOX GAME:
There was an in depth discussion on the word “spunk” after the 8:00 news today, as it was used by Eddie Jordan when referring to this Sunday’s British Grand Prix @ Silverstone. Chris said he’d never heard it in that context before, only in Neighbours when they refer to someone who’s really fit. Dave explained that spunk also means to have a bit of ooomph and get up and go about you, which is what was being referred to in this example. Chris said alright, but added that he doesn’t like the word full stop as it has other connotations perhaps not suitable for the Radio One Breakfast Show. If you thought this was going to put him off doing the obvious gags though then you were sadly mistaken. He went back to the link with Scott and said that Mills seems to have a lot of get up and go about him first thing in the morning, even when you think he’s just finished. Dave joined in the fun and said that Scott might even show some of his get up and go to the lucky students at Reading tonight.
Chris - Seriously, you get an eyeful of what he’s got on stage tonight
(Dave & Jules laugh)
Dave - mmm. He’s got a real treat in store for the audience
Chris (laughing) - I’m telling you
As you may expect, Moyles was making a real push on the text message front this morning, managing to get the figure past 115 000 by the end of play, all in aid of Sport Relief of course. To try and push this figure up though, he said that if the figure reached 110 000 by the end of the 8:30 news he’d play The Aled Inbox Game, basically reading out loads of text messages from Aled’s phone. Aled started squirming and Rachel said she’d never seen him look so worried in all his life. As a matter of fact the figure only got up to 107 000, but what the hell it was all for charidee and Chris proceeded with the game anyway. Sneaky Aled managed to delete all of his sent messages before Chris got to his phone, although he did forget to delete his drafts.
Aled - Oh balls
(Dom laughs)
Dave - Yeah that was one of them
(Aled laughs)
Many of the texts were very charged and dubious, with examples being “I am curious”, “Can you e-mail me an address to send you photos to?” and “Hey baby, I miss our little chats”. The texts read out came from Aled’s mates Spencer, Joel, Kate and Mandy, plus one from Rachel and one from Dom (of all people). The old “Aled’s wife” gag made a return and there was also one from a girl called Elaine...
Chris - OK, Elaine sent a text message saying big thanks for the lovely what?
(Dom laughs)
Aled - Oh bum!
Dave (laughs) - Blimey!!!
Chris (laughing too) - Really? Wow!!
(all laugh)
Chris - Thanks for the lovely bum eh!
The correct answer was flowers, but Aled wanted to get his own back on Chris by telling a story from Portugal that was highly embarrassing for Moyles but not for him, as he was drunk. It involved a big light and Chris putting Aled to bed. Chris tried to turn off Aled’s mic but he went to Dom’s, of which Chris has no control over...
Aled - So you say “say good night now” and look up at the light and blow, and I blew with all my hearts content...
Dave - What??!!
(the whole team laugh furiously and clap as Chris starts Lou Reed)
Aled - No no I didn’t mean it like...
Dave - Were there candles in the room Aled? I mean I’m just trying to rescue you here
(laughter continues from Dom, Jules and Rach)
BB ALED AND CHIX WIN TIX:>>>>
(Becki, favourite to get the boot tonight)
Tonight is eviction night again in Big Brother, with Ahmed up against (relatively) new girl Becki, who is the overwhelming favourite to leave. I don’t think Becki looks as bad as some people say, although Chris obviously disagrees with me. He said he’d give Aled a hundred quid if he called her Gonzo at tonight’s press conference. Other questions suggested included “Have you ever considered getting a nose reduction?”, “Do you think you smell of cheese?” and (my favourite) “What’s it like to be a transsexual?”. The plan at this point is for her to then say that no that’s Nadia, to which Aled will respond with “oh really?”. It’ll be genius should it come off. Chris also wants Jones to ask Becki which she rates more important in her life - make up or paper bags. Aled said he might ask that one, hoping for all his life that it is her who gets evicted. This isn’t cos he hates her though, it’s because evil Ahmed scares him. Comedy Dave also sat through his first full edition of BB this series last night, saying that he found it enlightening and somewhat shocking. He was of course referring to the housemates and their nipple sucking jam antics, saying that he didn’t know that kind of stuff went on on British television. Other BB stuff today included Chris asking where the hell fit Shell’s big ass had come from, and him playing out clips of Marco talking about Aled (recorded earlier this week). Marco blatantly lied by saying he seemed a nice guy (I mean he is but they didn’t get on), and he said that if Aled knocked on his door he’d invite him in for a cuppa. Chris said that if he knocked on Marco’s door he’d knock him out, a sentiment I’d agree with (although violence isn’t necessarily the answer kids...just on this occasion).
(Rubens Barrichello winning the 2003 British Grand Prix @ Silverstone)
Chicks Win Tix (second rate King Of Tickets) was back after a long absence this morning, giving away a pair of tickets to this Sunday’s previously mentioned British Grand Prix at Silverstone. The winner was Debbie, who owns her own hairdressers called Hair FX in Peterborough. She correctly identified Michael Schumacher as the winner of last Sunday’s French Grand Prix, therefore beating miserable and quiet Nicola from South Wales. Debbie asked Chris if he was going to the Grand Prix on Sunday. He said no as he’ll be in Leeds, although he was invited by Jordan.
Debbie - Oh, you should have gone
Chris - Yeah but I don’t really like her
(Debbie laughs)
*ber dum tish*. Oh and for the less intellectually gifted amongst you, yes it was a joke and he had been invited by the Jordan racing team.
OTHER STUFF ON TODAY’S SHOW:>>>>
It was pretty busy today so there are still a couple of bits and bobs left to run through. There was another brilliant country cover by Hayseed Dixie, this time of Walk This Way by Aerosmith & Run DMC. Chris also discussed this weeks late night editions of Hollyoaks, and the one last night where Lisa Hunter (Gemma Atkinson) got it on with another woman. I actually caught a bit of it when flicking through the channels last night and all I have to say is bloody hell. Chris missed it but set his Sky Plus, and admitted that he’s just been flicking through each episode to find any action. He (as we all know) has a thing for Gemma, and he said she was a piece of ass and had a great rack on her, as it’s as if she’s smuggling basketballs for the NBA (his words not mine). Rach complained that “she’s got a great rack on her” was such a vulgar expression, but Chris said to be fair Rach had a pretty decent rack on her herself (he said she looks better with a bit of colour in her now). Rach recalled the time Moyles drooled all over Gemma in Liverpool, and he said he’d drool all over her any day. Dave called him a sick man and said that he thought women would find that image unsavoury and uncomfortable. Chris said some women would find it erotic, but Dave said that no one could find the image of Chris drooling like some German Shepherd erotic. He also wanted to clarify that he was referring to a dog when he said “German Shepherd” and not just some bloke from Dusseldorf.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
KEV a lorry driver from Shrewsbury 2
JOHNNY from Dewsbury who works at Ikea 0
**For some reason there was also a fair bit of Dom bashing going on during today’s Carpark Catchphrase, mainly concentrated on his lack of hair...
Chris (talking about Ikea) - Have you ever been there slaphead?
(Greyhead laughs) Dom - Sorry, that me again?
(Chris laughs)
Dom - Yes I have thank you fatty
(everyone in the studio laughs and makes collective “oooh” sound)
Chris (deep voice) - Leave it Byrne**
Daves Tedious Link
Kylie Minogue Put Yourself In My Place - Kylie Minogue has a sister called Dannii who used to go out with Jacques Villeneuve - The literal translation of “ville neuve” is new town, a bit like Milton Keynes - Milton Keynes is the home of MK Dons, who used to be Wimbledon - Wimbledon beat Liverpool in the FA Cup Final of 1988, the same year that Phil Collins topped the charts with “A Groovy Kind Of Love”, which was taken from the film Buster - Buster was all about the great train robbery of 1963, which made famous real life crook Ronnie Biggs - Ronnie Biggs used to live in Rio - Rio was the title of a 1982 album by Duran Duran - Duran Duran were formed in Birmingham - Birmingham is the home of Jasper Carrott - Carrots help you see in the dark, along with the light from the moon and the stars - and the stars are used as a navigational tool by African tribes who wander across deserts on camels and stuff in search of somewhere new to live, and are known as “Nomads” - Which links us to Nomad and (I Wanna Give You) Devotion
FLAWS
*Nomads are Arabic, not African
*They also don’t travel in “search of somewhere new to live”, as they just wander aimlessly and don’t settle down
*There isn’t actually any “light from the moon”, as it’s just reflected/refracted light from the Sun
WEEK HIGHLIGHTS:
SHOWS OF THE WEEK: Monday/Thursday
MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: Birthday clips, Eurostar gag, Jo Brand on the phone and Wes mishearing the Furnish line (Monday), Rachel Stevens’ surprisingly good appearance as guest, The Purple Room story and Flat Idol (Tuesday) plus the street hoodlums story, Chris Eubank, Chris’s rants and Joce’s hair (all Wednesday). Also, Dave’s drunken antics and Richard Whiteley (Thursday) and Buzz Off, Mills and The Aled Inbox Game (all today). Plus, don’t forget that you can Listen Again to all the weeks shows by following the links to The BBC Radio Player/Real One from Chris’s Radio One mini-site @ http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chrismoyles.
THE MOYLES MINI OLYMPICS
They will begin on Monday and presumably run for just one week, as Chris and the team take a two week break from July 19th - August 2nd, with Mills standing in on Breakfast of course. Dave will still appear half way through that break though for his and Chappers final Saturday show, which should be on July 24th. Back to The Moyles Mini Olympics though, where Chris will be giving away a two day break to Athens for one lucky person and friend to go and see the diving, athletics, basketball and Taekwondo. It is truly a money can’t buy prize, with a nice variation of sports in there too. With the Commonwealth Games being held here in Manchester 2 years ago I got the chance to go and see a load of Olympic sports, and if you ever get the chance to go and see any of them yourself I advise you do, as you’ll have such a great time. The big competition kicks off this Monday, probably after 8 o’clock...
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=148303#148303">> Friday July 9th Show & Show Review - HAVE YOUR SAY!! <</A>
Some bad news to begin with then today - Dave was sober. Damn it. He stayed off the booze last night at Chris’s house as he was driving, although in a strange reversal of roles his wife Emma nearly got bladdered, just deciding against it as she has a big day at work today. With just a day to go until The Moyles Mile in Leeds, Chris finally got in a bit of training yesterday afternoon. He did an hour and a quarters worth of work out with his new personal trainer, including some step, some weights, a run, some squat things, some more weights, some press ups, some sit ups and finally some crunches. He said he was aching badly this morning. Rachel despite her not running the mile went swimming last night, although Dave said she was more of a Mark Radcliffe than a Paula Radcliffe. Dave and Chappers will be on the treadmills tomorrow from 1 don’t forget, with Aled supposedly joining Chris to run in Leeds and Dom and Jules as yet unsure of what they’re doing. Dom (who was bathing his boy when Chris rang him yesterday...and that’s not a euphemism) is now thinking he’ll run, although Juliette was toying with the idea of going to watch Port Vale instead in a pre season friendly. Chris said she wasn’t really, she’s just a lazy tart who wasn’t sponsoring him to save up some money for a bottle of Blue Nun. She didn’t disagree. The Greyhead trails about Chris’s dad were also repeated again today, with Dave saying that the Hovis bed reminded him of bicycles, loaves and cobbled streets. Yep, thanks for that Dave. Chris also replayed his Sport Relief celebrity messages at the top of the show, including two new ones recorded by Jon Culshaw as Trevor McDonald and George W Bush. The Bush one was the funniest, with him urging all English people to text their supportification in for Larry Moyles in the kilometre race across the state of Ohio, Leeds. Chris said that he was doing something very special to do with Sport Relief later this morning, and revealed that he’d be re appearing on Jo Whiley’s show after 11 o’clock with a special celebrity guest. He revealed that he’d be on Radio One, but not at Radio One...the plot thickens eh. Chris was all smartly dressed up for the occasion in proper pants and a funky t shirt, and he told people not to switch over to their local radio top ten at ten when Jo came on today, instead urging them to sit back and enjoy Jo’s first hour of music, entertainment and chat. I can honestly say that I’ve got no idea what Chris’s mystery mission is, but if it is any good then I’ll include it in a special review outside of this particular entry. Buzz Off this morning was a classic. That is a word overused by myself but on this occasion I do mean it, as the song Chris chose should go down as one of the greatest records of all time (let alone the last 20 years as Chris said). It was of course Step On by The Happy Mondays, number 5 back 14 and a bit years ago in April 1990. 82% of the audience voted Buzz On, Aled buzzed on 3:13 wanting a shorter edit, Dave was next on 5:03 and Rach last on 5:04. Chris said that listening back to that made him want to kiss Shaun Ryder on the face (ok now I wouldn’t go that far), adding that he should be knighted for that one track alone. I know Chris commented in Shaun’s book and everything but I think even he has to admit that he’s just a mess nowadays (as that BBC3 series proved).
SPORT RELIEF THE FINAL PUSH - SCOTT MILLS LIVE ON THE PHONE:>>>>
*good mornin*
Scott was live on the phone from Mills Mansion after half seven, completing the weeks line up of “celebrity” Sport Relief guests on Breakfast. Scott was up and out of bed and had a fag on the go already, saying that he’ll be needing a few more of those tomorrow afternoon. He plans to run when the TV Cameras are on him on Grandstand, and then walk the rest. Kate Lawler will apparently be joining him to run though, and she’s quite fit (in more ways than one). Dave asked Scott if he considered himself to be Southampton’s biggest celebrity. He said outside of Craig David and Chris Packham from The Really Really Wild Show, undoubtedly. Scott’s preparations for The Mills Mile haven’t been the best, as he hasn’t started training yet and is gigging tonight on his Sex Tour in Reading. He’s on stage about midnight and is relying on a sober driver to wake him up and drive him to Southampton in the morning. This driver won’t be his totally straight comedian flat mate who has now retired (I presume this has been mentioned on his afternoon show or summat), and Chris told Scott to walk into his room live on the air and ask him to consider coming out of retirement for one more gig. He did so and he agreed, which Chris said would make another weeks worth of material for Scott. Scott said it wasn’t some sort of elaborate joke and he doesn’t actually want his flat mate to fail, instead encouraging Comedy Dave to write some gags for him. Dave said he might do, although Chris said he had a cracking knock knock joke to start him off:
Chris - Knock knock
Scott (rather reluctantly) - Who’s there?
Chris - I dunup
Scott (laughs loudly) - I dunupwho
It’s a gooden. Chris wanted to check Scott was all ready for tomorrow. He said he thought so, although he was unsure about one piece of (kind of) important information...
Scott - What time’s the race?
Dave - One
Chris (laughs) - Jesus, one o’clock Scott
(Scott & Chris laugh) Scott - Ok, right
Scott said yep he had his Sport Relief t-shirt and sweat bands ready, although Jo Whiley wants him to run it in lycra. In fact he even dressed up in it for her and had some shots taken for Radio One Online, which you can see here:
Comedy Dave said he found the Dirty Den sucking pose not “apt” but disturbing, and Scott said he also found Jo’s fascination with cupping his breasts quite weird too. Moyles said he’d noticed that Jo herself wasn’t actually running the mile, although it’s understandable with her arthritis kicking in and all that. Scott suggested she do the mile in a zimmer frame and called her the new June Whitfield. He also said that if she didn’t have her zimmer frame, she could always do it in her walking bath...
Dave - or she could do it in one of those sort of shop mobility buggies
(Scott laughs)
SPUNKY SCOTT AND THE ALED INBOX GAME:
There was an in depth discussion on the word “spunk” after the 8:00 news today, as it was used by Eddie Jordan when referring to this Sunday’s British Grand Prix @ Silverstone. Chris said he’d never heard it in that context before, only in Neighbours when they refer to someone who’s really fit. Dave explained that spunk also means to have a bit of ooomph and get up and go about you, which is what was being referred to in this example. Chris said alright, but added that he doesn’t like the word full stop as it has other connotations perhaps not suitable for the Radio One Breakfast Show. If you thought this was going to put him off doing the obvious gags though then you were sadly mistaken. He went back to the link with Scott and said that Mills seems to have a lot of get up and go about him first thing in the morning, even when you think he’s just finished. Dave joined in the fun and said that Scott might even show some of his get up and go to the lucky students at Reading tonight.
Chris - Seriously, you get an eyeful of what he’s got on stage tonight
(Dave & Jules laugh)
Dave - mmm. He’s got a real treat in store for the audience
Chris (laughing) - I’m telling you
As you may expect, Moyles was making a real push on the text message front this morning, managing to get the figure past 115 000 by the end of play, all in aid of Sport Relief of course. To try and push this figure up though, he said that if the figure reached 110 000 by the end of the 8:30 news he’d play The Aled Inbox Game, basically reading out loads of text messages from Aled’s phone. Aled started squirming and Rachel said she’d never seen him look so worried in all his life. As a matter of fact the figure only got up to 107 000, but what the hell it was all for charidee and Chris proceeded with the game anyway. Sneaky Aled managed to delete all of his sent messages before Chris got to his phone, although he did forget to delete his drafts.
Aled - Oh balls
(Dom laughs)
Dave - Yeah that was one of them
(Aled laughs)
Many of the texts were very charged and dubious, with examples being “I am curious”, “Can you e-mail me an address to send you photos to?” and “Hey baby, I miss our little chats”. The texts read out came from Aled’s mates Spencer, Joel, Kate and Mandy, plus one from Rachel and one from Dom (of all people). The old “Aled’s wife” gag made a return and there was also one from a girl called Elaine...
Chris - OK, Elaine sent a text message saying big thanks for the lovely what?
(Dom laughs)
Aled - Oh bum!
Dave (laughs) - Blimey!!!
Chris (laughing too) - Really? Wow!!
(all laugh)
Chris - Thanks for the lovely bum eh!
The correct answer was flowers, but Aled wanted to get his own back on Chris by telling a story from Portugal that was highly embarrassing for Moyles but not for him, as he was drunk. It involved a big light and Chris putting Aled to bed. Chris tried to turn off Aled’s mic but he went to Dom’s, of which Chris has no control over...
Aled - So you say “say good night now” and look up at the light and blow, and I blew with all my hearts content...
Dave - What??!!
(the whole team laugh furiously and clap as Chris starts Lou Reed)
Aled - No no I didn’t mean it like...
Dave - Were there candles in the room Aled? I mean I’m just trying to rescue you here
(laughter continues from Dom, Jules and Rach)
BB ALED AND CHIX WIN TIX:>>>>
(Becki, favourite to get the boot tonight)
Tonight is eviction night again in Big Brother, with Ahmed up against (relatively) new girl Becki, who is the overwhelming favourite to leave. I don’t think Becki looks as bad as some people say, although Chris obviously disagrees with me. He said he’d give Aled a hundred quid if he called her Gonzo at tonight’s press conference. Other questions suggested included “Have you ever considered getting a nose reduction?”, “Do you think you smell of cheese?” and (my favourite) “What’s it like to be a transsexual?”. The plan at this point is for her to then say that no that’s Nadia, to which Aled will respond with “oh really?”. It’ll be genius should it come off. Chris also wants Jones to ask Becki which she rates more important in her life - make up or paper bags. Aled said he might ask that one, hoping for all his life that it is her who gets evicted. This isn’t cos he hates her though, it’s because evil Ahmed scares him. Comedy Dave also sat through his first full edition of BB this series last night, saying that he found it enlightening and somewhat shocking. He was of course referring to the housemates and their nipple sucking jam antics, saying that he didn’t know that kind of stuff went on on British television. Other BB stuff today included Chris asking where the hell fit Shell’s big ass had come from, and him playing out clips of Marco talking about Aled (recorded earlier this week). Marco blatantly lied by saying he seemed a nice guy (I mean he is but they didn’t get on), and he said that if Aled knocked on his door he’d invite him in for a cuppa. Chris said that if he knocked on Marco’s door he’d knock him out, a sentiment I’d agree with (although violence isn’t necessarily the answer kids...just on this occasion).
(Rubens Barrichello winning the 2003 British Grand Prix @ Silverstone)
Chicks Win Tix (second rate King Of Tickets) was back after a long absence this morning, giving away a pair of tickets to this Sunday’s previously mentioned British Grand Prix at Silverstone. The winner was Debbie, who owns her own hairdressers called Hair FX in Peterborough. She correctly identified Michael Schumacher as the winner of last Sunday’s French Grand Prix, therefore beating miserable and quiet Nicola from South Wales. Debbie asked Chris if he was going to the Grand Prix on Sunday. He said no as he’ll be in Leeds, although he was invited by Jordan.
Debbie - Oh, you should have gone
Chris - Yeah but I don’t really like her
(Debbie laughs)
*ber dum tish*. Oh and for the less intellectually gifted amongst you, yes it was a joke and he had been invited by the Jordan racing team.
OTHER STUFF ON TODAY’S SHOW:>>>>
It was pretty busy today so there are still a couple of bits and bobs left to run through. There was another brilliant country cover by Hayseed Dixie, this time of Walk This Way by Aerosmith & Run DMC. Chris also discussed this weeks late night editions of Hollyoaks, and the one last night where Lisa Hunter (Gemma Atkinson) got it on with another woman. I actually caught a bit of it when flicking through the channels last night and all I have to say is bloody hell. Chris missed it but set his Sky Plus, and admitted that he’s just been flicking through each episode to find any action. He (as we all know) has a thing for Gemma, and he said she was a piece of ass and had a great rack on her, as it’s as if she’s smuggling basketballs for the NBA (his words not mine). Rach complained that “she’s got a great rack on her” was such a vulgar expression, but Chris said to be fair Rach had a pretty decent rack on her herself (he said she looks better with a bit of colour in her now). Rach recalled the time Moyles drooled all over Gemma in Liverpool, and he said he’d drool all over her any day. Dave called him a sick man and said that he thought women would find that image unsavoury and uncomfortable. Chris said some women would find it erotic, but Dave said that no one could find the image of Chris drooling like some German Shepherd erotic. He also wanted to clarify that he was referring to a dog when he said “German Shepherd” and not just some bloke from Dusseldorf.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
KEV a lorry driver from Shrewsbury 2
JOHNNY from Dewsbury who works at Ikea 0
**For some reason there was also a fair bit of Dom bashing going on during today’s Carpark Catchphrase, mainly concentrated on his lack of hair...
Chris (talking about Ikea) - Have you ever been there slaphead?
(Greyhead laughs) Dom - Sorry, that me again?
(Chris laughs)
Dom - Yes I have thank you fatty
(everyone in the studio laughs and makes collective “oooh” sound)
Chris (deep voice) - Leave it Byrne**
Daves Tedious Link
Kylie Minogue Put Yourself In My Place - Kylie Minogue has a sister called Dannii who used to go out with Jacques Villeneuve - The literal translation of “ville neuve” is new town, a bit like Milton Keynes - Milton Keynes is the home of MK Dons, who used to be Wimbledon - Wimbledon beat Liverpool in the FA Cup Final of 1988, the same year that Phil Collins topped the charts with “A Groovy Kind Of Love”, which was taken from the film Buster - Buster was all about the great train robbery of 1963, which made famous real life crook Ronnie Biggs - Ronnie Biggs used to live in Rio - Rio was the title of a 1982 album by Duran Duran - Duran Duran were formed in Birmingham - Birmingham is the home of Jasper Carrott - Carrots help you see in the dark, along with the light from the moon and the stars - and the stars are used as a navigational tool by African tribes who wander across deserts on camels and stuff in search of somewhere new to live, and are known as “Nomads” - Which links us to Nomad and (I Wanna Give You) Devotion
FLAWS
*Nomads are Arabic, not African
*They also don’t travel in “search of somewhere new to live”, as they just wander aimlessly and don’t settle down
*There isn’t actually any “light from the moon”, as it’s just reflected/refracted light from the Sun
WEEK HIGHLIGHTS:
SHOWS OF THE WEEK: Monday/Thursday
MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: Birthday clips, Eurostar gag, Jo Brand on the phone and Wes mishearing the Furnish line (Monday), Rachel Stevens’ surprisingly good appearance as guest, The Purple Room story and Flat Idol (Tuesday) plus the street hoodlums story, Chris Eubank, Chris’s rants and Joce’s hair (all Wednesday). Also, Dave’s drunken antics and Richard Whiteley (Thursday) and Buzz Off, Mills and The Aled Inbox Game (all today). Plus, don’t forget that you can Listen Again to all the weeks shows by following the links to The BBC Radio Player/Real One from Chris’s Radio One mini-site @ http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/chrismoyles.
THE MOYLES MINI OLYMPICS
They will begin on Monday and presumably run for just one week, as Chris and the team take a two week break from July 19th - August 2nd, with Mills standing in on Breakfast of course. Dave will still appear half way through that break though for his and Chappers final Saturday show, which should be on July 24th. Back to The Moyles Mini Olympics though, where Chris will be giving away a two day break to Athens for one lucky person and friend to go and see the diving, athletics, basketball and Taekwondo. It is truly a money can’t buy prize, with a nice variation of sports in there too. With the Commonwealth Games being held here in Manchester 2 years ago I got the chance to go and see a load of Olympic sports, and if you ever get the chance to go and see any of them yourself I advise you do, as you’ll have such a great time. The big competition kicks off this Monday, probably after 8 o’clock...
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=148303#148303">> Friday July 9th Show & Show Review - HAVE YOUR SAY!! <</A>
