chrismoyles.net
- Thu Jul 15, 2004 9:54 am
#241974
TODAY WITH 21 MINUTES MORE MOYLES!!! (Jo Whiley got stuck on a train)
1. Usher feat Ludacris - Yeah 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 3. Evanescence - Bring Me To Life, 4. Shaznay Lewis - Never Felt Like This Before, 5. BUZZ OFF - Go West - We Close Our Eyes, 6. Jet - Are You Gonna Be My Girl 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. J Kwon - Tipsy, 8. Daniel Bedingfield - Gotta Get Thru This, 9. Franz Ferdinand - Michael, 10. Girls Aloud - The Show 8:00 NEWSBEAT 11. Blur - Parklife, 12. Jamelia - See It In A Boy's Eyes, 13. Busted - Thunderbirds Are Go 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Lou Reed - Satellite Of Love (Dab Hands Remix), 15. Alicia Keys - Fallin', 16. Scissor Sisters - Laura, 17. Lionel Richie - All Night Long (All Night - Unknown Remix), 18. The Cure - Friday I'm In Love (Tedious Link), 19. Maroon 5 - This Love, 20. Twista feat Anthony Hamilton - Sunshine, 21. The Streets - Dry Your Eyes, 22. Keane - Everybody's Changing 9:30 NEWSBEAT 23. Kelis - Milkshake, 24. Snow Patrol - Spitting Games, 25. Pink feat William Orbit - Feel Good Time MOYLES IN FOR JO WHILEY:>>>> 26. Estelle - 1980, 27. Faithless - We Come One, 28. Nelly Furtado - Forca, 29. Kanye West feat Syleena Johnson - All Falls Down
Chris said he hadn’t laughed so much in ages. He was of course referring to Dave and Aled’s brief but brilliant TV appearance on Chase-it.tv yesterday, which Dom called the funniest two minutes of television he had ever seen. Him and Chris were on the phone to each other before and after this groundbreaking piece of TV, which didn’t disappoint. Chris had tons of audio from the day, including some special new chase-it.tv jingles for the team and a message from everyones favourite chase-it.tv presenter (well the only one we know) - the one and only Mr Jim *pop a doodle do* Brooman himself. Jim had recorded a special message for Dave and Aled congratulating them on their performance, saying that he was now fearing for his job. He ended by saying “Don’t forget the thrill is in the chase...on chase-it.tv”, to which Chris replied “Oh bless him, he badly needs to get laid”. Chris also had the full audio from Dave and Aled’s appearances on screen, which he played after 7:30 this morning. First though he got them both to run through their day, including details on them in make up, their lunch with the production staff and their early afternoon spent sitting in the swanky, posh presenters lounge. They were both keen to thank everyone at Chase-it for looking after them, and of course for giving around roughly £100 per mug to Sport Relief. Aled thought it was weird that Greyhead Will seemed to know everyone there as he walked around with them though. Dave said it was cos Will thinks he’s Spielberg, and Aled called him a TV “mogul”. Chris said he thought that was a normal person in Harry Potter...
Rachel - No that’s a muggle
Chris - Ah right (laughs)
Dave’s two minute selling of the mugs was the first performance to come under scrutiny, with Chris killing himself at Vitty’s talkback problem. Overall he did well but once in a while he’d just stop mid flow, giving away the fact that someone from the gallery was speaking into his earpiece. The audio was hilarious as Chris played it out in full again, and Dave said granted the there’s an art to talkback that he is yet to master. Chris was disappointed as he genuinely thought Dave was going to stop and reply to the gallery on air. Dom noticed that Dave always glanced left from the autocue when he had a talkback moment. Apart from these hilarious stoppages, the highlights of Dave’s appearance were “I don’t know about you, but when I wake up in the morning I want a cup of tea”, him saying “very very” 4 times in 20 seconds and him also forgetting the channel strapline as the clock ticked down to the chase. Chris loved the way he ended his piece with the following...
Dave - Be part of the chase on Chase-it.tv, let’s chase it!
Aled was next on with his job being to sell the Chris Moyles Show mugrabilia being given away (that’s what Dave was calling it anyway). He was told the maximum time he could be on camera was 4 minutes, and he was all psyched up and ready to go for that length of time. However unfortunately, his performance was cut short after just 5 seconds as all the mugs went in a major #key moment. Chris said Aled’s face was a real picture.
- Don’t forget you can view it all for yourself in Real One Player here (thanks to Radio One Online), and you can read all about their performance on Chase-it.tv in a special review by me down the page.
(Aled, Jim Brooman and Dave yesterday)
THE MOYLES MINI OLYMPICS - DAY 4:>>>>
TODAY’S EVENT - BASKETBALL...or to be more precise, mini pink Barbie Basketball.
(Butch Moyles prepares to play Barbie Basketball, Rachel shoots...and scores!!!)
Today is the final heat then of The Moyles Mini Olympics, which tomorrow will finally give away that two day trip for two to Athens to see the Diving, Athletics, Basketball and Taekwondo at The Olympic Games 2004. The final couple of contestants battling it out to come down to London tomorrow for the big craptathlon (as it’s been called by Dave) were Polly, a secretary administrator from Buxton and Peter parked just off the M25, who works for a pharmaceutical company. Polly said she’d only just started her new job but was hating it already, which is why she was a bit vague on the details...
Chris - What job would you like to do Polly? If you could choose any job in the world, what would you love to do?
Polly - Nothing
Chris - OK great, you start work at Radio One Monday...second floor, management
(all laugh in studio)
- Chris turned to Peter next....
Chris - Do you like your job?
Peter - I love my job, yeah it’s great
Dave - Is your boss listening?
Peter - Er she’s in the passenger seat
(all laugh)
Dave - Is the right answer then
Peter - Only joking
Despite being discouraged not to, Polly chose Chris to represent her in today’s Moyles Mini Olympics event. He was borderline furious, as it meant Aled had to come around the desk and operate all the knobs and buttons. He also knew he was crap too. Peter broke with the tradition this week and selected Rachel as his player, a good choice as it turned out as she beat Moyles 4-2 in a Best Of Five Barbie Basketball shoot out. That means Peter becomes the final contestant through To The Moyles Mini Olympics Studio Final tomorrow morning. The full line up will be Martin, Matthew, Charlie and Peter, presumably with the events beginning after 8:00. Just one more point to mention today in regards to this feature - and that's Rachel almost combusting after the 8:00 news when Chris played a jingle and didn’t read out the number for the competition. Moyles put on his Kiddyminster accent and echo and did a great impression of her. Dom tried to join in too, but he just ended up sounding like John Lennon.
FINTON TURNS ONE AND CHRIS AND DAVE DISCUSS THUNDERBIRDS:
*smell the irony*
(Daddy Dom’s son turns one)
Today is a very special day in the Byrne household as it’s baby Fin’s first birthday!! A big party is planned at the house for him and all his other screaming baby friends, while in the other room Dom, Nic and all the other parents will great drunk on Blue Nun (or at least that’s the plan anyway). None of the radio team have been invited though, and Chris really wants to go now after Dom confirmed that there will be jelly there. Soon after Chris and Dave quite suitably discussed the subject of Thunderbirds, as Chris played the Busted song from the new film and said he watched some trails for it on the Official Thunderbirds Movie Website yesterday. Chris also has Thunderbird 2 as his PC wallpaper and used the website facility to design his own Thunderbird, called “Dave1”. Dave said he was honoured...
Dave - Why did you choose my name though?
Chris - Huh?
Dave - Why did you choose my name?
Chris - Cos it looked crap (hits intro to Busted song again)
Dave - Right
Chris said he couldn’t wait to see the film as he’s always loved Thunderbirds. I did too, when I was a KID though. Dave said he’d never really understood the plot to Thunderbirds, and his obvious lack of knowledge became apparent as Chris ran him through how it worked. He explained that Jeff Tracy was a brilliant engineer who recruited the world’s greatest scientist Brains to set up an International Rescue Headquarters on a deserted island after his wife’s death. With the island called Tracy Island, Dave was wondering if he’d named it after his dead wife as a tribute. Chris said no, but Dave was brilliantly wondering if Jeff’s wife was called “Tracy Tracy”, like Neville Neville (who I’ve met a couple of times actually). Chris said no, and explained that she was dead and he should get over it. When he then stated that Thunderbirds was set in the future though, Dave interrupted and said in that case maybe Tracy wasn’t dead. Chris said no she was and this discussion almost put Dom in stitches.
Chris - What’s your favourite Thunderbird Dave?
Dave (pause) - ...Jeff
(all laugh - including Dave)
ROUND UP OF OTHER STUFF ON THE SHOW TODAY:>>>>
With Scott Mills filling in for Chris and the team this following fortnight, Chris wanted to ring him at 9:20 to see if he had anything planned for the show yet. Scott didn’t pick up any of the three calls Moyles made so with time to fill and boredom kicking in, Chris flicked through his celebrity phonebook to try and find other schlabrities to ring up and try and make Dave correctly identify. No one was answering though, even Leigh Francis’s phone went straight to voicemail (aka Avid Merrion). Rachel said it was a good job. With the game frantically dying on it’s arse thanks to the fact that none of Chris’s celebrity pals appeared to be listening, it called for drastic measures. He rang up Aled in the Live Lounge and with Jones putting on a silly voice (Dom said it sounded like a Scouse Will Young), nobody could guess who he was...even me. Chris then rang him back after the 9:30 news for him to reveal himself (but not in that way thankfully). Other stuff on the show today included chat about Rachel’s new £40 haircut, more embarrassing One Life trails featuring Dave saying “firm up your booty” (he stressed it wasn’t his script) and Juliette breaking up the days big sports news to include a story about Leeds United beating Swedish side Boden 2-0 in a pre season friendly. It was met with unsurprising cheers from Chris...
Jules - I thought I’d just squeeze that in there
Chris - mmm (laughs)
(Jules continues her bulletin)
Chris (interrupts) - Not the first time you’ve said that my darlin’
(she laughs and tries to read a story about Tiger Woods)
Music on the show today came courtesy of Jet, Maroon 5, classic Blur and the new one from Franz Ferdinand, plus Sunshine by Twista & Anthony Hamilton (which samples Lovely Day by Bill Withers). This evoked memories of the old Bill Withers Lovely Day game that Chris and Dave used to play on afternoons, with the basic rules being that the person to hold the long note for the longest (if you get me) being declared as the winner. Chris said that they had moved on from such childish things now though and were more sophisticated in their humour *belches* (he didn’t really). In other words, Chris would have played the game had he had the clip to hand. He said he’ll make sure he does for next time. Buzz Off this morning was a bit of an accident but a success. Chris actually played the wrong track from his compilation CD but the team were liking it so much that they persuaded him to keep it on. It was We Close Our Eyes by Go West, a number 5 hit back in February 1985. Rachel was the exception to the “liking it” and she buzzed it off after a minute and 35 claiming it was boring her. The listeners voted it on though with a result of 67% Buzz On and Dave and then Aled finally buzzed in the fade around the 3:35 mark. Dave was particularly buzzing (if you excuse the pun) and said he’d forgotten how great that record was. Chris has promised to play what was his original choice for Buzz Off today at 20 past 7 tomorrow morning on the show.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
(Today a special edition featuring the two thickest blokes on the planet)
LEE some sort of engineer from Elstree in Hertfordshire 2
NICK an Autoglass Windscreen Fitter from Plymouth 1
Daves Tedious Link
Chic Good Times - Good times is the opposite of bad times or indeed “sour times”, which was a hit for Portishead - Portishead the band are named after a small seaside town near Bristol - Bristol is the city that gave us both Massive Attack and Tricky - If you add Dickie to Tricky you get “Tricky Dickie”, who was a former baddie in EastEnders - EastEnders is a soap that made famous Pauline Fowler, who is played by the actress Wendy Richard - Wendy Richard shares the same surname as Little Richard, who is famous for being a pianist - Pianists tend to have long fingers which allow them to reach the keys - Keys first name Richard is a Sky Sports anchor - An anchor of a different type is something used to stop ships drifting, like Driftwood which was a hit for Travis - Travis have a bassist called Dougie Payne - and a pain is something that you might need to alleviate with the help of medicine, which in this case could provide “the cure” - Which links us predictably to The Cure and Friday I'm In Love
WENDY RICHARD OR WENDY RICHARDS?
*It’s the question on the lips of the nation after this morning’s Tedious Link. What is Pauline Fowler’s real name? While the team argued otherwise, Dave was insistent it was “Richard” singular and was proved right after searching the web for info. I must admit I always thought it was “Richards” (not that I really care either way) and Dave was making sure that nobody got the muddled up again. He said he was working with stupid people. Probably a tad harsh but Dave wins nevertheless.
CHRIS MOYLES EXTRA - CHRIS FILLS IN FOR JO:
There was nothing irregular about the way the show ended today, Chris and Dom were even joking along as usual in the final link before the pips:
Chris - Thank you Dominic
Dom - Thank you
Chris - You know I could hang out with you all day..
Dom - I could with you too
Chris - ..but I’ve gotta tuck myself back in and get on my way now
(laughter)
The pips played and everyone waited for Jo Whiley’s first song to start, a signal that we can all turn off the radio or go switch over to Ken Bruce or some other over enthusiastic local tinpot DJ who can’t wait to play you the top ten at ten from September 1993. What we didn’t expect though was a brief silence after the pips and then the sound of Chris’s voice again. He revealed that Whiley was stuck on a train somewhere and not at Radio One yet, so he suggested a list of possible options from this point onwards:
- Either play non stop music and pretend Jo was there but had just gone for a dump (nice)
- Just carry on as normal and extend The Chris Moyles Show
- Put on his awful Jo Whiley impression and try and do the show as her
The actual result was a combination of the final two options, although Chris had to stress to Dominic first that this wasn’t a joke and they were really still on the air. The texts came flying in and on the whole they generally seemed to agree with Dave’s suggestion that the team just “guff around” for an undisclosed period of time. Chris was slightly concerned about one text though that read “Go Chris Go” though, as he didn’t know whether it was meant in an American cheerleader stylee or as in Chris, just get lost. At one minute past ten Moyles said this was now overtime for him and Dave who are freelance, and they can now claim shift rate for that. He told the bosses to check the contract and read the small print. He also told all RAJAR diary owners to just extend the tick for “Chris Moyles”...lovely. After a brief musical interlude and a few Jo Whiley jingles, Chris returned and welcomed us along in a soft whisper. His Comedy Sidekick “Indie Dave” joined in too as they thanked fatty on before them and proceeded to discuss the latest tour news on both T-Rex and Wizzard & Roy Wood.
Dave - We have to relate to Jo’s audience and not our own now y’see
Chris - Yeah. I’m going to relate to Jo’s audience...I hate Chris Moyles. He’s a fat sexist pig who surrounds himself with idiot sycophants who laugh at everything he says
(Dom, Dave, Aled and Rachel laugh)
Rach - I hate them
TODAY’S MOYLES EXTRA SHOW MENU>>>>
1045 - The Entertainment News with Moyles and Briggy, including a discussion on Sharon Stone doing Basic Instinct 2. Chris said he had a great gag about her doing the famous scene at her age but didn’t think it’d be suitable for Jo’s audience somehow.
1120 - Last Resort giving away...erm, a power kite lesson. Rock on.
1150 - This week’s Pet Sound from The Prodigy.
1210 - Movie News With James King (Chris said he’d be pretty peed off if he was still on then).
1230 - Dom and Dave’s Acoustic Live Lounge Set - Featuring their tribute to Bobby McFerrin
Dave - Can we do Soup Of The Day as well?
(Chris and Rach laugh)
Chris - I don’t know what that is
Dave - Soup Of The Day, I’ve always wanted to do this feature...
Chris - OK go on
Dave - ...I think of a soup and you have to guess what flavour it is
I’m sure you’ll agree it’s almost genius. Chris played Forca by Nelly Furtado and when he returned on the other side, Jo Whiley had sadly arrived. She thanked them and blamed Virgin Trains for her late arrival as her train into London broke down this morning. Chris said she should have expected that though, as Virgin Trains never go all the way *ber dum tish*. Jo said she’d still keep Soup Of The Day as a feature on her show today though as the text response had literally gone mad for it. Dave said he’d write the flavour down down for her and she could read it out after 11. I presume she didn’t but if she did really and you heard the flavour please e-mail me, as knowing this will really enhance my life *taps fingers on table* (click on MC by the title of the review to e-mail). After a bit of a ruuuubish interview with Jo, Chris told her that she now owed him one for covering 21 minutes of her show for her. She offered to repay the gift in chips, but he was thinking more along the lines of her in a nurses uniform and him as her sick patient who needs his temperature taking. "If you're like me" (see what I did there), then that image alone will just makes you feel sick.
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8127">> Thursday July 15th 2004 - What Did You Think Of This Show/Review? Tell Us Here! <</A>
1. Usher feat Ludacris - Yeah 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 3. Evanescence - Bring Me To Life, 4. Shaznay Lewis - Never Felt Like This Before, 5. BUZZ OFF - Go West - We Close Our Eyes, 6. Jet - Are You Gonna Be My Girl 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. J Kwon - Tipsy, 8. Daniel Bedingfield - Gotta Get Thru This, 9. Franz Ferdinand - Michael, 10. Girls Aloud - The Show 8:00 NEWSBEAT 11. Blur - Parklife, 12. Jamelia - See It In A Boy's Eyes, 13. Busted - Thunderbirds Are Go 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Lou Reed - Satellite Of Love (Dab Hands Remix), 15. Alicia Keys - Fallin', 16. Scissor Sisters - Laura, 17. Lionel Richie - All Night Long (All Night - Unknown Remix), 18. The Cure - Friday I'm In Love (Tedious Link), 19. Maroon 5 - This Love, 20. Twista feat Anthony Hamilton - Sunshine, 21. The Streets - Dry Your Eyes, 22. Keane - Everybody's Changing 9:30 NEWSBEAT 23. Kelis - Milkshake, 24. Snow Patrol - Spitting Games, 25. Pink feat William Orbit - Feel Good Time MOYLES IN FOR JO WHILEY:>>>> 26. Estelle - 1980, 27. Faithless - We Come One, 28. Nelly Furtado - Forca, 29. Kanye West feat Syleena Johnson - All Falls Down
Chris said he hadn’t laughed so much in ages. He was of course referring to Dave and Aled’s brief but brilliant TV appearance on Chase-it.tv yesterday, which Dom called the funniest two minutes of television he had ever seen. Him and Chris were on the phone to each other before and after this groundbreaking piece of TV, which didn’t disappoint. Chris had tons of audio from the day, including some special new chase-it.tv jingles for the team and a message from everyones favourite chase-it.tv presenter (well the only one we know) - the one and only Mr Jim *pop a doodle do* Brooman himself. Jim had recorded a special message for Dave and Aled congratulating them on their performance, saying that he was now fearing for his job. He ended by saying “Don’t forget the thrill is in the chase...on chase-it.tv”, to which Chris replied “Oh bless him, he badly needs to get laid”. Chris also had the full audio from Dave and Aled’s appearances on screen, which he played after 7:30 this morning. First though he got them both to run through their day, including details on them in make up, their lunch with the production staff and their early afternoon spent sitting in the swanky, posh presenters lounge. They were both keen to thank everyone at Chase-it for looking after them, and of course for giving around roughly £100 per mug to Sport Relief. Aled thought it was weird that Greyhead Will seemed to know everyone there as he walked around with them though. Dave said it was cos Will thinks he’s Spielberg, and Aled called him a TV “mogul”. Chris said he thought that was a normal person in Harry Potter...
Rachel - No that’s a muggle
Chris - Ah right (laughs)
Dave’s two minute selling of the mugs was the first performance to come under scrutiny, with Chris killing himself at Vitty’s talkback problem. Overall he did well but once in a while he’d just stop mid flow, giving away the fact that someone from the gallery was speaking into his earpiece. The audio was hilarious as Chris played it out in full again, and Dave said granted the there’s an art to talkback that he is yet to master. Chris was disappointed as he genuinely thought Dave was going to stop and reply to the gallery on air. Dom noticed that Dave always glanced left from the autocue when he had a talkback moment. Apart from these hilarious stoppages, the highlights of Dave’s appearance were “I don’t know about you, but when I wake up in the morning I want a cup of tea”, him saying “very very” 4 times in 20 seconds and him also forgetting the channel strapline as the clock ticked down to the chase. Chris loved the way he ended his piece with the following...
Dave - Be part of the chase on Chase-it.tv, let’s chase it!
Aled was next on with his job being to sell the Chris Moyles Show mugrabilia being given away (that’s what Dave was calling it anyway). He was told the maximum time he could be on camera was 4 minutes, and he was all psyched up and ready to go for that length of time. However unfortunately, his performance was cut short after just 5 seconds as all the mugs went in a major #key moment. Chris said Aled’s face was a real picture.
- Don’t forget you can view it all for yourself in Real One Player here (thanks to Radio One Online), and you can read all about their performance on Chase-it.tv in a special review by me down the page.
(Aled, Jim Brooman and Dave yesterday)
THE MOYLES MINI OLYMPICS - DAY 4:>>>>
TODAY’S EVENT - BASKETBALL...or to be more precise, mini pink Barbie Basketball.
(Butch Moyles prepares to play Barbie Basketball, Rachel shoots...and scores!!!)
Today is the final heat then of The Moyles Mini Olympics, which tomorrow will finally give away that two day trip for two to Athens to see the Diving, Athletics, Basketball and Taekwondo at The Olympic Games 2004. The final couple of contestants battling it out to come down to London tomorrow for the big craptathlon (as it’s been called by Dave) were Polly, a secretary administrator from Buxton and Peter parked just off the M25, who works for a pharmaceutical company. Polly said she’d only just started her new job but was hating it already, which is why she was a bit vague on the details...
Chris - What job would you like to do Polly? If you could choose any job in the world, what would you love to do?
Polly - Nothing
Chris - OK great, you start work at Radio One Monday...second floor, management
(all laugh in studio)
- Chris turned to Peter next....
Chris - Do you like your job?
Peter - I love my job, yeah it’s great
Dave - Is your boss listening?
Peter - Er she’s in the passenger seat
(all laugh)
Dave - Is the right answer then
Peter - Only joking
Despite being discouraged not to, Polly chose Chris to represent her in today’s Moyles Mini Olympics event. He was borderline furious, as it meant Aled had to come around the desk and operate all the knobs and buttons. He also knew he was crap too. Peter broke with the tradition this week and selected Rachel as his player, a good choice as it turned out as she beat Moyles 4-2 in a Best Of Five Barbie Basketball shoot out. That means Peter becomes the final contestant through To The Moyles Mini Olympics Studio Final tomorrow morning. The full line up will be Martin, Matthew, Charlie and Peter, presumably with the events beginning after 8:00. Just one more point to mention today in regards to this feature - and that's Rachel almost combusting after the 8:00 news when Chris played a jingle and didn’t read out the number for the competition. Moyles put on his Kiddyminster accent and echo and did a great impression of her. Dom tried to join in too, but he just ended up sounding like John Lennon.
FINTON TURNS ONE AND CHRIS AND DAVE DISCUSS THUNDERBIRDS:
*smell the irony*
(Daddy Dom’s son turns one)
Today is a very special day in the Byrne household as it’s baby Fin’s first birthday!! A big party is planned at the house for him and all his other screaming baby friends, while in the other room Dom, Nic and all the other parents will great drunk on Blue Nun (or at least that’s the plan anyway). None of the radio team have been invited though, and Chris really wants to go now after Dom confirmed that there will be jelly there. Soon after Chris and Dave quite suitably discussed the subject of Thunderbirds, as Chris played the Busted song from the new film and said he watched some trails for it on the Official Thunderbirds Movie Website yesterday. Chris also has Thunderbird 2 as his PC wallpaper and used the website facility to design his own Thunderbird, called “Dave1”. Dave said he was honoured...
Dave - Why did you choose my name though?
Chris - Huh?
Dave - Why did you choose my name?
Chris - Cos it looked crap (hits intro to Busted song again)
Dave - Right
Chris said he couldn’t wait to see the film as he’s always loved Thunderbirds. I did too, when I was a KID though. Dave said he’d never really understood the plot to Thunderbirds, and his obvious lack of knowledge became apparent as Chris ran him through how it worked. He explained that Jeff Tracy was a brilliant engineer who recruited the world’s greatest scientist Brains to set up an International Rescue Headquarters on a deserted island after his wife’s death. With the island called Tracy Island, Dave was wondering if he’d named it after his dead wife as a tribute. Chris said no, but Dave was brilliantly wondering if Jeff’s wife was called “Tracy Tracy”, like Neville Neville (who I’ve met a couple of times actually). Chris said no, and explained that she was dead and he should get over it. When he then stated that Thunderbirds was set in the future though, Dave interrupted and said in that case maybe Tracy wasn’t dead. Chris said no she was and this discussion almost put Dom in stitches.
Chris - What’s your favourite Thunderbird Dave?
Dave (pause) - ...Jeff
(all laugh - including Dave)
ROUND UP OF OTHER STUFF ON THE SHOW TODAY:>>>>
With Scott Mills filling in for Chris and the team this following fortnight, Chris wanted to ring him at 9:20 to see if he had anything planned for the show yet. Scott didn’t pick up any of the three calls Moyles made so with time to fill and boredom kicking in, Chris flicked through his celebrity phonebook to try and find other schlabrities to ring up and try and make Dave correctly identify. No one was answering though, even Leigh Francis’s phone went straight to voicemail (aka Avid Merrion). Rachel said it was a good job. With the game frantically dying on it’s arse thanks to the fact that none of Chris’s celebrity pals appeared to be listening, it called for drastic measures. He rang up Aled in the Live Lounge and with Jones putting on a silly voice (Dom said it sounded like a Scouse Will Young), nobody could guess who he was...even me. Chris then rang him back after the 9:30 news for him to reveal himself (but not in that way thankfully). Other stuff on the show today included chat about Rachel’s new £40 haircut, more embarrassing One Life trails featuring Dave saying “firm up your booty” (he stressed it wasn’t his script) and Juliette breaking up the days big sports news to include a story about Leeds United beating Swedish side Boden 2-0 in a pre season friendly. It was met with unsurprising cheers from Chris...
Jules - I thought I’d just squeeze that in there
Chris - mmm (laughs)
(Jules continues her bulletin)
Chris (interrupts) - Not the first time you’ve said that my darlin’
(she laughs and tries to read a story about Tiger Woods)
Music on the show today came courtesy of Jet, Maroon 5, classic Blur and the new one from Franz Ferdinand, plus Sunshine by Twista & Anthony Hamilton (which samples Lovely Day by Bill Withers). This evoked memories of the old Bill Withers Lovely Day game that Chris and Dave used to play on afternoons, with the basic rules being that the person to hold the long note for the longest (if you get me) being declared as the winner. Chris said that they had moved on from such childish things now though and were more sophisticated in their humour *belches* (he didn’t really). In other words, Chris would have played the game had he had the clip to hand. He said he’ll make sure he does for next time. Buzz Off this morning was a bit of an accident but a success. Chris actually played the wrong track from his compilation CD but the team were liking it so much that they persuaded him to keep it on. It was We Close Our Eyes by Go West, a number 5 hit back in February 1985. Rachel was the exception to the “liking it” and she buzzed it off after a minute and 35 claiming it was boring her. The listeners voted it on though with a result of 67% Buzz On and Dave and then Aled finally buzzed in the fade around the 3:35 mark. Dave was particularly buzzing (if you excuse the pun) and said he’d forgotten how great that record was. Chris has promised to play what was his original choice for Buzz Off today at 20 past 7 tomorrow morning on the show.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
(Today a special edition featuring the two thickest blokes on the planet)
LEE some sort of engineer from Elstree in Hertfordshire 2
NICK an Autoglass Windscreen Fitter from Plymouth 1
Daves Tedious Link
Chic Good Times - Good times is the opposite of bad times or indeed “sour times”, which was a hit for Portishead - Portishead the band are named after a small seaside town near Bristol - Bristol is the city that gave us both Massive Attack and Tricky - If you add Dickie to Tricky you get “Tricky Dickie”, who was a former baddie in EastEnders - EastEnders is a soap that made famous Pauline Fowler, who is played by the actress Wendy Richard - Wendy Richard shares the same surname as Little Richard, who is famous for being a pianist - Pianists tend to have long fingers which allow them to reach the keys - Keys first name Richard is a Sky Sports anchor - An anchor of a different type is something used to stop ships drifting, like Driftwood which was a hit for Travis - Travis have a bassist called Dougie Payne - and a pain is something that you might need to alleviate with the help of medicine, which in this case could provide “the cure” - Which links us predictably to The Cure and Friday I'm In Love
WENDY RICHARD OR WENDY RICHARDS?
*It’s the question on the lips of the nation after this morning’s Tedious Link. What is Pauline Fowler’s real name? While the team argued otherwise, Dave was insistent it was “Richard” singular and was proved right after searching the web for info. I must admit I always thought it was “Richards” (not that I really care either way) and Dave was making sure that nobody got the muddled up again. He said he was working with stupid people. Probably a tad harsh but Dave wins nevertheless.
CHRIS MOYLES EXTRA - CHRIS FILLS IN FOR JO:
There was nothing irregular about the way the show ended today, Chris and Dom were even joking along as usual in the final link before the pips:
Chris - Thank you Dominic
Dom - Thank you
Chris - You know I could hang out with you all day..
Dom - I could with you too
Chris - ..but I’ve gotta tuck myself back in and get on my way now
(laughter)
The pips played and everyone waited for Jo Whiley’s first song to start, a signal that we can all turn off the radio or go switch over to Ken Bruce or some other over enthusiastic local tinpot DJ who can’t wait to play you the top ten at ten from September 1993. What we didn’t expect though was a brief silence after the pips and then the sound of Chris’s voice again. He revealed that Whiley was stuck on a train somewhere and not at Radio One yet, so he suggested a list of possible options from this point onwards:
- Either play non stop music and pretend Jo was there but had just gone for a dump (nice)
- Just carry on as normal and extend The Chris Moyles Show
- Put on his awful Jo Whiley impression and try and do the show as her
The actual result was a combination of the final two options, although Chris had to stress to Dominic first that this wasn’t a joke and they were really still on the air. The texts came flying in and on the whole they generally seemed to agree with Dave’s suggestion that the team just “guff around” for an undisclosed period of time. Chris was slightly concerned about one text though that read “Go Chris Go” though, as he didn’t know whether it was meant in an American cheerleader stylee or as in Chris, just get lost. At one minute past ten Moyles said this was now overtime for him and Dave who are freelance, and they can now claim shift rate for that. He told the bosses to check the contract and read the small print. He also told all RAJAR diary owners to just extend the tick for “Chris Moyles”...lovely. After a brief musical interlude and a few Jo Whiley jingles, Chris returned and welcomed us along in a soft whisper. His Comedy Sidekick “Indie Dave” joined in too as they thanked fatty on before them and proceeded to discuss the latest tour news on both T-Rex and Wizzard & Roy Wood.
Dave - We have to relate to Jo’s audience and not our own now y’see
Chris - Yeah. I’m going to relate to Jo’s audience...I hate Chris Moyles. He’s a fat sexist pig who surrounds himself with idiot sycophants who laugh at everything he says
(Dom, Dave, Aled and Rachel laugh)
Rach - I hate them
TODAY’S MOYLES EXTRA SHOW MENU>>>>
1045 - The Entertainment News with Moyles and Briggy, including a discussion on Sharon Stone doing Basic Instinct 2. Chris said he had a great gag about her doing the famous scene at her age but didn’t think it’d be suitable for Jo’s audience somehow.
1120 - Last Resort giving away...erm, a power kite lesson. Rock on.
1150 - This week’s Pet Sound from The Prodigy.
1210 - Movie News With James King (Chris said he’d be pretty peed off if he was still on then).
1230 - Dom and Dave’s Acoustic Live Lounge Set - Featuring their tribute to Bobby McFerrin
Dave - Can we do Soup Of The Day as well?
(Chris and Rach laugh)
Chris - I don’t know what that is
Dave - Soup Of The Day, I’ve always wanted to do this feature...
Chris - OK go on
Dave - ...I think of a soup and you have to guess what flavour it is
I’m sure you’ll agree it’s almost genius. Chris played Forca by Nelly Furtado and when he returned on the other side, Jo Whiley had sadly arrived. She thanked them and blamed Virgin Trains for her late arrival as her train into London broke down this morning. Chris said she should have expected that though, as Virgin Trains never go all the way *ber dum tish*. Jo said she’d still keep Soup Of The Day as a feature on her show today though as the text response had literally gone mad for it. Dave said he’d write the flavour down down for her and she could read it out after 11. I presume she didn’t but if she did really and you heard the flavour please e-mail me, as knowing this will really enhance my life *taps fingers on table* (click on MC by the title of the review to e-mail). After a bit of a ruuuubish interview with Jo, Chris told her that she now owed him one for covering 21 minutes of her show for her. She offered to repay the gift in chips, but he was thinking more along the lines of her in a nurses uniform and him as her sick patient who needs his temperature taking. "If you're like me" (see what I did there), then that image alone will just makes you feel sick.
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8127">> Thursday July 15th 2004 - What Did You Think Of This Show/Review? Tell Us Here! <</A>
