chrismoyles.net
- Thu Aug 12, 2004 9:04 pm
#241988
1. Pink - God Is A DJ 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Outkast - Hey Ya, 3. Natasha Bedingfield - These Words, 4. Lostprophets - Last Summer, 5. BUZZ OFF - Duran Duran - The Reflex, 6. Jamelia - Thank You 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme, 8. Robbie Williams - Feel, 9. Beenie Man - King Of The Dancehall, 10. The Darkness - I Believe In A Thing Called Love, 11. The Black Eyed Peas - Let’s Get It Started 8:00 NEWSBEAT 12. Avril Lavigne - My Happy Ending, 13. Electric Six - Danger! High Voltage, 14. Sugababes - Caught In A Moment, 15. Eminem - Without Me 8:30 NEWSBEAT 16. Kylie Minogue - Can’t Get You Out Of My Head, 17. Franz Ferdinand - Michael, 18. Kelis - Trick Me, 19. 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes, 20. Oasis - Some Might Say (Tedious Link), 21. Estelle - 1980, 22. Armand Van Helden - My My My, 23. Twista feat Anthony Hamilton - Sunshine, 24. The Thrills - Whatever Happened To Corey Haim 9:30 NEWSBEAT 25. Foo Fighters - All My Life, 26. The 411 - Dumb, 27. Justin Timberlake - Rock Your Body
Now it’s fair to say that The Chris Moyles Show isn’t regarded as being the most high brow on the dial, but today the team once and for all ridded themselves of their “laddish” label - by discussing breasts, shaven rollocks, a random bird with “the best bappas in Ayia Napa”, more breasts, breast reductions and erm, somewhat specialist sandwiches. Breakfast Radio at it’s best from the BBC. I am obviously taking the piss a bit but today was actually by far and away the best show of the week so far. It started with more backtiming chaos though, as Chris abruptly cut short Leave by Jo Jo after just a minute and a bit. He explained that it’s an old tradition in radio for one show to start at one time and then the next show to take over at the next time. This tradition has been running for generations in fact, that is until JK and Joel arrive - produced by Disco Dave. Now Nemone is usually just a few seconds light, but today dippy Dave came up to Chris and Rach in the corridor to tell them they were also running light. Not however by 15 seconds, but by 2 feckin minutes. Chris told Dave it wasn’t his problem, so in the end JK and Joel stuck on Jo Jo at 6:53.
Comedy Dave - I’ve said this before but you’re a real stickler for timings aren’t you?
Chris - Well you know me, I like to be bang on...(pause)..well apart from when it comes to our news junctions...
Dave - mmm (laughs)
Chris said actually if he just faded them back up, you’d be able to hear JK and Joel critiquing themselves next door in their post show meeting. Cue Chris playing in a clip from The Chuckle Brothers going “oh dear oh dear”. He then said he had one of their new jingles, *plays Chuckle, Chuckle Vision*. Very funny but slightly harsh. Chris also played a “We Love Weekends” trail that seemed to suggest they were called JJK and Joel, if you listened closely. If you missed it don’t worry, it’ll no doubt be repeated every other half hour for the next 18 months. Chris was straight into the show this morning, no messing around. First up - Pink is a bit manly but you would. Secondly - He saw a few of “Team GB” on the news last night and basically thinks they are all munters. He asked Juliette if there is actually any good looking people in our Olympic squad. She wanted to know if he was on about males or females. He said in some cases it’s hard to tell..
Chris - Where are all the top heavy lovelies?
Jules suggested a few names that she thought he might approve of, although she kinda thought wrong. Chris described Beth Tweddle as a horse mixed in with Dr. Spock, Nicole Cook as a fella and Paula Radcliffe as attractive but with an ironing board for a chest. Dave said that Athletics people are more concerned with being aerodynamic than good looking to be fair. I can’t actually think of many fit athletes off the top of my head (fit as in attractive obviously), although I’m sure plenty will be discussed on this page over the forthcoming weeks. Just while we’re on the subject of whether people are fit or not - Chris calling Natasha Bedingfield “a fitter version of Amy Winehouse” is ridiculous. Natasha Bedingfield is actually very attractive, plus the words “fit” and “Amy Winehouse” should never go in the same sentence...ever. Oh damn it.
Talking of Athletics stuff and being fit (I apologise for that tenuous link), Chris started his new fitness regime yesterday - by walking home from work. He complimented this (which beats going out for a run) by doing some weights - which turned his voice into that of Mel B from Bo Selecta. Nice. Today’s Tedious Link was a fantastic record (with surely one of the best ever intros), but Buzz Off wasn’t too bad either. Chris thankfully didn’t go for another Warren G B-Side, but instead for Duran Duran’s April 84 number one hit The Reflex. Chris was on drums and Dom in cowbell heaven as the track faded out without any votes from the team. The listener vote was 64% Buzz On. Rachel just wished people could have seen Dom and Chris as their drum and comedy sound effect antics gave the track an extra dimension. That wasn’t a direct quote btw. Only 40 minutes later people could see Chris making an arse out of himself though - on the webcam. Him and an apple munching Rach had been granted, slightly unprofessional in pulling faces at each other while Dominic was reading the 8 o’clock news, but weren't expecting the webcam to go off and capture them. It did though and Chris said the photo of him made him look like he’d got his zip trapped, although Rach was just pleased it didn’t go off while she was pretending to punch him...
Dave - I was worried actually that it might have been a web shot of me reading The Daily Sport, with the headline “I’ve got the best bappas in Ayia Napa”...
(Chris, Dom and Rach laugh)
Dave - ...which is a top story
After Dave described how 20 year old Holly Stott from Manchester works in the Havana Bar and likes nothing better than “pulling pints for thirsty holiday makers”, he then confirmed her 34DD knockers are now officially “the best bappas in Ayia Napa”. Chris said that’d all be well and good if she didn’t have a face liked a slapped arse. Just to recap then, Dom was busy reading important news stories while Chris and Rach pulled silly faces and Dave looked at breasts in The Daily Sport. Juliette in Athens logged on to the net and took a look at the webcam for herself. You can do so below too. Thanks go to Tam Iverson for e-mailing it across to me straight away, but I’ll also remind you that you can access archived webcam shots from the last show at any time by visiting the chrismoyles.net Webcam Archive (plug plug).
(The webcam shot in question - what the hell is going on with Chris's shirt btw?)
MOYLES MAKES THE DAILY SPORT AND THE TEAM TALK TRIMMING:
Chris told Dom just after the 7:30 news that he had read a very good bulletin but missed out one of the mornings main headlines from the papers. Dom asked which one - The Guardian, The Independent? Nope, The Daily Sport. First for news. The front page sub headline was “Radio One Stars Sex Shave Secret” and 2 records later Chris made Dom read out the article from page 9 on the air. Byrne had deliberately not looked at it for the duration of those 2 songs, and Chris warned him he’d have to read ahead as the vast majority of it was unbroadcastable. Basically the story was all about Chris’s (to be honest not new) revelations yesterday that he likes to shave his downstairs department. Again, high brow BBC at it’s best. The story was full of beautiful terms such as “Gobby DJ”, “tubby jock”, “sidekick Comedy Dave” and “his sidekick quipped”. Dave said he couldn’t ever remember quipping in his life. The best quote of all though was the following:
Dom Reads - “Dave said he was busy erecting a flat pack piece of furniture, to which Chris replied his buddy was camp”
(Rach, Dave and Chris laugh)
The Sport also said Moyles and Vitty were “goading each other” and claimed that Dave “hinted Chris had homosexual tendencies”. The main word in the article that Dom kept editing out was obviously bollocks, but Dave decided to live life on the edge and say “rollocks”. He told Chris that rollocks isn’t actually a rude word though, as he found out on a text the other day that it’s actually the cups/receptacles upon the side of a boat that the oars go in. So actually, you need a pair of rollocks to go to sea. Dave called this a “fact flash” and as usual, infotainment. I like Dom’s new word for it though - enterformation. Rachel didn’t believe Daves rollocks line so did a Google search on it and found out that there is actually a Rollocks Online - The Official Newsletter Of The Torquay Rowing Club. It looks about 3 years out of date to me though.
Dave - Hey, when I talk it’s serious
The subject of shaving down below arose again (probably a bad choice of word) just after half time. Chris was keen to stress that he didn’t shave, just tidy - both under his arms and downstairs. Dave said he found it camp and effeminate though, and Dom had to agree. Both said they had never trimmed either area ever,. Chris said he didn’t know why Dom didn’t just cut off the forest under his arms and stick it to his head with pritstick. Hmm, it's not a good look baby. Other bits in this segment included Chris with a brilliant Stuart Hall esque laugh and Jules admitting that she likes a hair free man on the chest. In an attempt to prove that what he does is not unnatural, Chris asked all the blokes who do do it to text the word “Yes” to 81199. 7000 came in in just 5 minutes. 3 also came in to his mobile phone from an actor, a massive pop star and a friend of the show. Cue a big game of Guess Who after the 9:30 news. When the team identified the right persons, Chris just said he didn’t want to play anymore - hence not actually confirming that it was them. The culprits as it were though - Jeremy Edwards, Will Young and the Mr *Buttylicious* himself...Longman.
LONGMAN’S CONTINENTAL MENU AND CHRIS WANTS TO BE A BOOB DONOR:>>>
I probably should explain that Longman is now banned from the show by Rachel following a string of inappropriate video messages & texts - plus a pretty disastrous phone appearance after 8:45 this morning. Chris had just rung to ask what this morning’s specials were, but Longman told him they were trying out a new Austrian menu today - including ladies kebab and finger pie. Needless to say Chris soon aborted the link...
Dave - Should really have pre recorded that phone call huh?
(Dom, Chris and Dave laugh as Chris starts Trick Me by Kelis)
The only reason why Longman was on in the first place was because Chris couldn’t get through to Aled, who was off sick for a second successive day. His phone went straight to voicemail but Dave said no need to worry, they just had to ring one of his other seven. Aled is now 8 Phones Jones btw. Chris didn’t have another number. Him and Sophie went out for a bit of food and a few drinks last night, this as well as watching the first three episodes of 24 Series 2 on DVD - and Hells Kitchen School Reunion with Gordon Ramsay and Jennifer Ellison on ITV1. Rach had told him to watch this as she thought it might be worth discussing on air. It wasn’t, and to make matters worse Rach didn’t even watch it herself in the end. Instead she watched a fascinating documentary on Channel 4 entitled “My Breasts Are Too Big”. Chris said with a title like that he should have had it in his Sky Planner for months, but in the end he only saw the last couple of minutes. I mean the concept of the show isn’t too difficult as the title would suggest - basically three women who’s boobs are too big for them and they want to get breast reductions. They all did, which Dave (who didn’t see it) thought kind of spoilt the programme really. He said “that’s not much of a cliffhanger”. Chris had to explain that it was actually an educational, informative programme and not a soap. Dave said he finds medical programmes a bit gory anyway - incidentally in the campest voice you’ve ever heard. This link (@ prime time 8:15 btw) got Chris thinking. He needs his man boobs reduced, and there are plenty of flat chested women out there who would be grateful for his boob fat (please refrain from eating cornflakes while reading this please - they don’t go well together). Therefore Chris came up with a breast transplant masterplan - to have an on air contest called “Boobie Prize” where flat chested women everywhere battle it out to win his boobs. Perfect public broadcasting if you ask me, although some issues like “would you get visiting rights?” did come up on the text. Chris said he’d have more info on this great contest sometime in the next 5 years. Great, can hardly wait.
Rach - High brow today...
(Next Wednesday on 4 @ 9pm - *Chris may be interested* “Boys With Breasts”)
ONE LIFE EXAM CAMPAIGN AND OTHER STUFF ON THE SHOW TODAY:>>>
A Level and AS Level results come out in England next Thursday (don’t I know it) but Standards and Highers grades are already out in Scotland - hence another big One Life read from Chris and Dave just before five to 9. Tick that box. As ever Chris was brutally honest...
Chris - Personally I don’t really care about your exam results but I’m contractually obliged to help you out with this read
Chris said he felt as though he should make the effort after that last set of RAJARS. Following Chris and Dave’s big sell, they played a One Life trail featuring Andrew in Livingston opening up his Highers results. He was hoping to get 3 A’s, a B and a C but got 5 straight A’s. Off the back of the trail Chris said he felt stupid, 1) because he’d just flogged his heart out to all the thickos for him to get 5 A’s, and 2) Because no one in his school even got 5 A’s.
Dave - They must be getting easier those exams, I never got five A’s!!
(Chris laughs)
Chris - Yeah but that’s because you’re thick
Dave - Well...um
Chris - Yeah
(hits 3 Of A Kind Baby Cakes vocal)
(http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/onelife)
Other stuff this morning included Chris being told he got a mention in Hollyoaks last night, and Rach revealing that her friend (who’s a photographer in New York) had her studio hijacked the other day for a scene with Brad Pitt and George Clooney in Oceans Twelve. This inevitably got the team back talking about their famous celeb spottings. In Daves case Dr Hilary Jones, and in Chris’s case both Chevy Chase and one of the Chuckle Brothers at his LA hotel. In fact Paul/Barry (dunno which) was sitting at the bar:
Chris - I said “hello JK mate, how are you?”
(Rach and Dom laugh)
ANOTHER FUNNY CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
DARRELL a delivery driver from Llandudno in North Wales 2
*GEORGE an accountant/cheesy tinpot DJ soundalike from Leighton Buzzard 1
*Who amazingly is getting married in two and a half weeks. Chris, Dave and Dom could hardly contain their disbelief..
Daves Tedious Link
MC Hammer U Can't Touch This - “You can’t touch this” is what you might be told by an irate decorator if you went anywhere near his wet paint - Paint It Black was a big hit for The Rolling Stones - Rolling stones are what you might experience during an avalanche, and if heavy enough these stones could pose a very real threat to surrounding buildings and people - People rhymes with steeple, which is something you might find a top a church - Church Of The Poison Mind was a hit for Culture Club - Other bands that contain the word “Culture” in the title include Culture Beat, who had a 1993 hit with Mr Vain - Vain people spend much of their time in front of the mirror - When smashed a mirror is supposed to give you seven years bad luck - Bad luck is the opposite of “Good Luck”, which was the title of a record by the Basement Jaxx - Jacks are used by thieves when removing the wheels from cars before leaving the cars on bricks - Bricks are traditionally used in the construction of houses - Houses are what both Noel and Liam Gallagher live in - and when you think of Noel and Liam Gallagher and perhaps say the first number one single that Oasis had, you think of Some Might Say - Which links us to Oasis and the (awesome) Some Might Say
FLAW
*Avalanches mainly consist of snow and ice and Dave was actually thinking of rockslides/landslides. Chris wouldn’t accept Daves claims that there are “rocks and boulders within the snow”
MINI MOYLES UPDATE:>>> (thanks to Jono as ever)
- Tomorrow Gary Lineker's on the show, plus you can win Premiership tickets
- As you’ve heard Aled is still skiving, they're still not sure what's wrong with him - maybe he picked up something tropical in Wales
- After the success of walking home yesterday, Chris will be getting the cab home today
- A bit of the studio cupboard fell on Rachel's foot today, and she's been moaning about it ever since
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8246">> Thursday August 12th 2004 - What Did You Think Of This Show/Review? Tell Us Here! <</A>
Now it’s fair to say that The Chris Moyles Show isn’t regarded as being the most high brow on the dial, but today the team once and for all ridded themselves of their “laddish” label - by discussing breasts, shaven rollocks, a random bird with “the best bappas in Ayia Napa”, more breasts, breast reductions and erm, somewhat specialist sandwiches. Breakfast Radio at it’s best from the BBC. I am obviously taking the piss a bit but today was actually by far and away the best show of the week so far. It started with more backtiming chaos though, as Chris abruptly cut short Leave by Jo Jo after just a minute and a bit. He explained that it’s an old tradition in radio for one show to start at one time and then the next show to take over at the next time. This tradition has been running for generations in fact, that is until JK and Joel arrive - produced by Disco Dave. Now Nemone is usually just a few seconds light, but today dippy Dave came up to Chris and Rach in the corridor to tell them they were also running light. Not however by 15 seconds, but by 2 feckin minutes. Chris told Dave it wasn’t his problem, so in the end JK and Joel stuck on Jo Jo at 6:53.
Comedy Dave - I’ve said this before but you’re a real stickler for timings aren’t you?
Chris - Well you know me, I like to be bang on...(pause)..well apart from when it comes to our news junctions...
Dave - mmm (laughs)
Chris said actually if he just faded them back up, you’d be able to hear JK and Joel critiquing themselves next door in their post show meeting. Cue Chris playing in a clip from The Chuckle Brothers going “oh dear oh dear”. He then said he had one of their new jingles, *plays Chuckle, Chuckle Vision*. Very funny but slightly harsh. Chris also played a “We Love Weekends” trail that seemed to suggest they were called JJK and Joel, if you listened closely. If you missed it don’t worry, it’ll no doubt be repeated every other half hour for the next 18 months. Chris was straight into the show this morning, no messing around. First up - Pink is a bit manly but you would. Secondly - He saw a few of “Team GB” on the news last night and basically thinks they are all munters. He asked Juliette if there is actually any good looking people in our Olympic squad. She wanted to know if he was on about males or females. He said in some cases it’s hard to tell..
Chris - Where are all the top heavy lovelies?
Jules suggested a few names that she thought he might approve of, although she kinda thought wrong. Chris described Beth Tweddle as a horse mixed in with Dr. Spock, Nicole Cook as a fella and Paula Radcliffe as attractive but with an ironing board for a chest. Dave said that Athletics people are more concerned with being aerodynamic than good looking to be fair. I can’t actually think of many fit athletes off the top of my head (fit as in attractive obviously), although I’m sure plenty will be discussed on this page over the forthcoming weeks. Just while we’re on the subject of whether people are fit or not - Chris calling Natasha Bedingfield “a fitter version of Amy Winehouse” is ridiculous. Natasha Bedingfield is actually very attractive, plus the words “fit” and “Amy Winehouse” should never go in the same sentence...ever. Oh damn it.
Talking of Athletics stuff and being fit (I apologise for that tenuous link), Chris started his new fitness regime yesterday - by walking home from work. He complimented this (which beats going out for a run) by doing some weights - which turned his voice into that of Mel B from Bo Selecta. Nice. Today’s Tedious Link was a fantastic record (with surely one of the best ever intros), but Buzz Off wasn’t too bad either. Chris thankfully didn’t go for another Warren G B-Side, but instead for Duran Duran’s April 84 number one hit The Reflex. Chris was on drums and Dom in cowbell heaven as the track faded out without any votes from the team. The listener vote was 64% Buzz On. Rachel just wished people could have seen Dom and Chris as their drum and comedy sound effect antics gave the track an extra dimension. That wasn’t a direct quote btw. Only 40 minutes later people could see Chris making an arse out of himself though - on the webcam. Him and an apple munching Rach had been granted, slightly unprofessional in pulling faces at each other while Dominic was reading the 8 o’clock news, but weren't expecting the webcam to go off and capture them. It did though and Chris said the photo of him made him look like he’d got his zip trapped, although Rach was just pleased it didn’t go off while she was pretending to punch him...
Dave - I was worried actually that it might have been a web shot of me reading The Daily Sport, with the headline “I’ve got the best bappas in Ayia Napa”...
(Chris, Dom and Rach laugh)
Dave - ...which is a top story
After Dave described how 20 year old Holly Stott from Manchester works in the Havana Bar and likes nothing better than “pulling pints for thirsty holiday makers”, he then confirmed her 34DD knockers are now officially “the best bappas in Ayia Napa”. Chris said that’d all be well and good if she didn’t have a face liked a slapped arse. Just to recap then, Dom was busy reading important news stories while Chris and Rach pulled silly faces and Dave looked at breasts in The Daily Sport. Juliette in Athens logged on to the net and took a look at the webcam for herself. You can do so below too. Thanks go to Tam Iverson for e-mailing it across to me straight away, but I’ll also remind you that you can access archived webcam shots from the last show at any time by visiting the chrismoyles.net Webcam Archive (plug plug).
(The webcam shot in question - what the hell is going on with Chris's shirt btw?)
MOYLES MAKES THE DAILY SPORT AND THE TEAM TALK TRIMMING:
Chris told Dom just after the 7:30 news that he had read a very good bulletin but missed out one of the mornings main headlines from the papers. Dom asked which one - The Guardian, The Independent? Nope, The Daily Sport. First for news. The front page sub headline was “Radio One Stars Sex Shave Secret” and 2 records later Chris made Dom read out the article from page 9 on the air. Byrne had deliberately not looked at it for the duration of those 2 songs, and Chris warned him he’d have to read ahead as the vast majority of it was unbroadcastable. Basically the story was all about Chris’s (to be honest not new) revelations yesterday that he likes to shave his downstairs department. Again, high brow BBC at it’s best. The story was full of beautiful terms such as “Gobby DJ”, “tubby jock”, “sidekick Comedy Dave” and “his sidekick quipped”. Dave said he couldn’t ever remember quipping in his life. The best quote of all though was the following:
Dom Reads - “Dave said he was busy erecting a flat pack piece of furniture, to which Chris replied his buddy was camp”
(Rach, Dave and Chris laugh)
The Sport also said Moyles and Vitty were “goading each other” and claimed that Dave “hinted Chris had homosexual tendencies”. The main word in the article that Dom kept editing out was obviously bollocks, but Dave decided to live life on the edge and say “rollocks”. He told Chris that rollocks isn’t actually a rude word though, as he found out on a text the other day that it’s actually the cups/receptacles upon the side of a boat that the oars go in. So actually, you need a pair of rollocks to go to sea. Dave called this a “fact flash” and as usual, infotainment. I like Dom’s new word for it though - enterformation. Rachel didn’t believe Daves rollocks line so did a Google search on it and found out that there is actually a Rollocks Online - The Official Newsletter Of The Torquay Rowing Club. It looks about 3 years out of date to me though.
Dave - Hey, when I talk it’s serious
The subject of shaving down below arose again (probably a bad choice of word) just after half time. Chris was keen to stress that he didn’t shave, just tidy - both under his arms and downstairs. Dave said he found it camp and effeminate though, and Dom had to agree. Both said they had never trimmed either area ever,. Chris said he didn’t know why Dom didn’t just cut off the forest under his arms and stick it to his head with pritstick. Hmm, it's not a good look baby. Other bits in this segment included Chris with a brilliant Stuart Hall esque laugh and Jules admitting that she likes a hair free man on the chest. In an attempt to prove that what he does is not unnatural, Chris asked all the blokes who do do it to text the word “Yes” to 81199. 7000 came in in just 5 minutes. 3 also came in to his mobile phone from an actor, a massive pop star and a friend of the show. Cue a big game of Guess Who after the 9:30 news. When the team identified the right persons, Chris just said he didn’t want to play anymore - hence not actually confirming that it was them. The culprits as it were though - Jeremy Edwards, Will Young and the Mr *Buttylicious* himself...Longman.
LONGMAN’S CONTINENTAL MENU AND CHRIS WANTS TO BE A BOOB DONOR:>>>
I probably should explain that Longman is now banned from the show by Rachel following a string of inappropriate video messages & texts - plus a pretty disastrous phone appearance after 8:45 this morning. Chris had just rung to ask what this morning’s specials were, but Longman told him they were trying out a new Austrian menu today - including ladies kebab and finger pie. Needless to say Chris soon aborted the link...
Dave - Should really have pre recorded that phone call huh?
(Dom, Chris and Dave laugh as Chris starts Trick Me by Kelis)
The only reason why Longman was on in the first place was because Chris couldn’t get through to Aled, who was off sick for a second successive day. His phone went straight to voicemail but Dave said no need to worry, they just had to ring one of his other seven. Aled is now 8 Phones Jones btw. Chris didn’t have another number. Him and Sophie went out for a bit of food and a few drinks last night, this as well as watching the first three episodes of 24 Series 2 on DVD - and Hells Kitchen School Reunion with Gordon Ramsay and Jennifer Ellison on ITV1. Rach had told him to watch this as she thought it might be worth discussing on air. It wasn’t, and to make matters worse Rach didn’t even watch it herself in the end. Instead she watched a fascinating documentary on Channel 4 entitled “My Breasts Are Too Big”. Chris said with a title like that he should have had it in his Sky Planner for months, but in the end he only saw the last couple of minutes. I mean the concept of the show isn’t too difficult as the title would suggest - basically three women who’s boobs are too big for them and they want to get breast reductions. They all did, which Dave (who didn’t see it) thought kind of spoilt the programme really. He said “that’s not much of a cliffhanger”. Chris had to explain that it was actually an educational, informative programme and not a soap. Dave said he finds medical programmes a bit gory anyway - incidentally in the campest voice you’ve ever heard. This link (@ prime time 8:15 btw) got Chris thinking. He needs his man boobs reduced, and there are plenty of flat chested women out there who would be grateful for his boob fat (please refrain from eating cornflakes while reading this please - they don’t go well together). Therefore Chris came up with a breast transplant masterplan - to have an on air contest called “Boobie Prize” where flat chested women everywhere battle it out to win his boobs. Perfect public broadcasting if you ask me, although some issues like “would you get visiting rights?” did come up on the text. Chris said he’d have more info on this great contest sometime in the next 5 years. Great, can hardly wait.
Rach - High brow today...
(Next Wednesday on 4 @ 9pm - *Chris may be interested* “Boys With Breasts”)
ONE LIFE EXAM CAMPAIGN AND OTHER STUFF ON THE SHOW TODAY:>>>
A Level and AS Level results come out in England next Thursday (don’t I know it) but Standards and Highers grades are already out in Scotland - hence another big One Life read from Chris and Dave just before five to 9. Tick that box. As ever Chris was brutally honest...
Chris - Personally I don’t really care about your exam results but I’m contractually obliged to help you out with this read
Chris said he felt as though he should make the effort after that last set of RAJARS. Following Chris and Dave’s big sell, they played a One Life trail featuring Andrew in Livingston opening up his Highers results. He was hoping to get 3 A’s, a B and a C but got 5 straight A’s. Off the back of the trail Chris said he felt stupid, 1) because he’d just flogged his heart out to all the thickos for him to get 5 A’s, and 2) Because no one in his school even got 5 A’s.
Dave - They must be getting easier those exams, I never got five A’s!!
(Chris laughs)
Chris - Yeah but that’s because you’re thick
Dave - Well...um
Chris - Yeah
(hits 3 Of A Kind Baby Cakes vocal)
(http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/onelife)
Other stuff this morning included Chris being told he got a mention in Hollyoaks last night, and Rach revealing that her friend (who’s a photographer in New York) had her studio hijacked the other day for a scene with Brad Pitt and George Clooney in Oceans Twelve. This inevitably got the team back talking about their famous celeb spottings. In Daves case Dr Hilary Jones, and in Chris’s case both Chevy Chase and one of the Chuckle Brothers at his LA hotel. In fact Paul/Barry (dunno which) was sitting at the bar:
Chris - I said “hello JK mate, how are you?”
(Rach and Dom laugh)
ANOTHER FUNNY CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
DARRELL a delivery driver from Llandudno in North Wales 2
*GEORGE an accountant/cheesy tinpot DJ soundalike from Leighton Buzzard 1
*Who amazingly is getting married in two and a half weeks. Chris, Dave and Dom could hardly contain their disbelief..
Daves Tedious Link
MC Hammer U Can't Touch This - “You can’t touch this” is what you might be told by an irate decorator if you went anywhere near his wet paint - Paint It Black was a big hit for The Rolling Stones - Rolling stones are what you might experience during an avalanche, and if heavy enough these stones could pose a very real threat to surrounding buildings and people - People rhymes with steeple, which is something you might find a top a church - Church Of The Poison Mind was a hit for Culture Club - Other bands that contain the word “Culture” in the title include Culture Beat, who had a 1993 hit with Mr Vain - Vain people spend much of their time in front of the mirror - When smashed a mirror is supposed to give you seven years bad luck - Bad luck is the opposite of “Good Luck”, which was the title of a record by the Basement Jaxx - Jacks are used by thieves when removing the wheels from cars before leaving the cars on bricks - Bricks are traditionally used in the construction of houses - Houses are what both Noel and Liam Gallagher live in - and when you think of Noel and Liam Gallagher and perhaps say the first number one single that Oasis had, you think of Some Might Say - Which links us to Oasis and the (awesome) Some Might Say
FLAW
*Avalanches mainly consist of snow and ice and Dave was actually thinking of rockslides/landslides. Chris wouldn’t accept Daves claims that there are “rocks and boulders within the snow”
MINI MOYLES UPDATE:>>> (thanks to Jono as ever)
- Tomorrow Gary Lineker's on the show, plus you can win Premiership tickets
- As you’ve heard Aled is still skiving, they're still not sure what's wrong with him - maybe he picked up something tropical in Wales
- After the success of walking home yesterday, Chris will be getting the cab home today
- A bit of the studio cupboard fell on Rachel's foot today, and she's been moaning about it ever since
<A HREF="http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~chris/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8246">> Thursday August 12th 2004 - What Did You Think Of This Show/Review? Tell Us Here! <</A>
