[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Beck, Loser

Today's Transcript:

The Chemical Brothers are made up of two blokes called Tom and Ed, and despite their name aren't actually brothers. Famous brothers from the world of music include the Gallagher brothers, Shaun Ryder and his brother Paul, and of course the Jonas Brothers. The word 'Jonas' is nearly an anagram of 'sonar', which is like the marine equivalent of radar, which is the way that whales and dolphins naturally navigate their way across the oceans. 'Ocean's Eleven' is the title of a re-made film starring Brad Pitt and George Clooney, who are two men seldom referred to as being ugly. 'Ugly Betty' is the name of an American telly show which features Scottish actress Ashley Jensen, who was in 'Extras' alongside Ricky Gervais. Despite his name, Ricky Gervais isn't actually French, and is from Reading. The town of Reading is spelt in exactly the same way as the word 'reading', which is the most popular pastime in a library. A library is somewhere that you might describe as being "oh so quiet". 'It's Oh So Quiet' is the name of a quirky hit from the mid-nineties by Icelandic fruitbat Bjork. Bjork is a good example of a one-name international solo artist that you would find alphabetically under the letter 'B', as is Beck, which links to Beck and 'Loser'.

Flaws:

Nothing to report today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1994

Highest UK Chart Position - #15

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Cameo, Word Up

Today's Transcript:

Beck's surname is Hansen, like Hanson the 'MmmBop' brothers, and also Alan Hansen who does 'Match Of The Day' alongside Gary Lineker. Gary Lineker is from Leicester, like Kasabian, who are fronted by Tom Meighan and guitarist Sergio Pizzorno, who's of Italian descent and raised in Leicester, although he was actually born in Newton Abbott in Devon. 'Devon' rhymes with 'heaven', which is where good people go when they die. 'Die' is the singular form of 'dice', while 'Dyce' spelt with a 'Y' is a small town near Aberdeen. Aberdeen is somewhere that you'd find a lot of granite buildings, and also a lot of men who work on oil rigs. Riggs, first name Martin, is the name of the 'Lethal Weapon' character played by actor Mel Gibson, who was born in New York and then moved to Australia when he was just twelve. Twelve is also known as a dozen, although a baker's dozen is when you get thirteen, which is one extra. 1Extra is Radio 1's sister station where Tim Westwood now does the afternoon show between 4pm and 7. Seven is the shirt number that David Beckham used to wear when he played for Manchester United, but these days he's signed to LA Galaxy in America, although just about to go on loan to Milan again. America is where Cameo are from, which links to Cameo and 'Word Up'.

Flaws:

Hansen is not Beck's real surname, it's actually Campbell.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1986

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

The Undertones, Teenage Kicks

Today's Transcript:

Cameo's 'Word Up' has been covered by a few people, including the Scottish band Gun, who are from Glasgow. Glasgow is also where Ally McCoist is from, who used to be a team captain on 'A Question Of Sport', which is hosted by Sue Barker. Sue Barker is mates with Cliff Richard, who's had a massive solo career but also used to be in a band called The Shadows. Shadows are what you don't want if you're trying to light a room so that you can do an interview. 'Interview With The Vampire' is the title of a book which was then made into a film starring Tom Cruise and Bard Pitt. Brad Pitt is the other half of Angelina Jolie, who likes to adopt kids from around the world, a bit like Madonna. Madonna was rumoured to be appearing on the final of 'X Factor' over the weekend, but it never happened, and the big star guest was Sir Paul McCartney. 'X Factor' was won by Tyneside student Joe McElderry, who was mentored by Cheryl Cole. Cheryl Cole is in a band called Girls Aloud, along with Sarah Harding, Kimberley Walsh, Nicola Roberts and Nadine Coyle, who's from Northern Ireland, which is where we're going this week. Northern Ireland is also where The Undertones are from, which links to The Undertones and 'Teenage Kicks'.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1978

Highest UK Chart Position - #31

This is now Dave's oldest link choice of 2009, predating last week's Clash track by a year.

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Girls Aloud, Biology

Today's Transcript:

The Undertones were fronted by Feargal Sharkey, who had a solo hit in the mid-eighties with a track called 'A Good Heart'. A good heart is what you'd be hoping for if you were waiting for a replacement on a cardiac transplant list. A list of a different type is what Father Christmas has to make at this time of year, to make sure he doesn't forget any presents for all the good girls and boys. 'Girls and Boys' was the title of a 1994 hit for Blur. Blur frontman Damon Albarn now does arty stuff and is one of the driving forces behind the cartoon musical band Gorillaz, while bass player Alex James does a bit of broadcasting and a bit of farming. Farming tends to be more common in the country, where there's a bit more space. Space is the final frontier, but was also the name of a late-90s short-lived Scouse group, who collaborated on 'The Ballad of Tom Jones' with Catatonia singer Cerys Matthews, who was in the jungle and fell in love with Marc Bannerman, who played Gianni DiMarco in 'Eastenders' and was the brother of Beppe DiMarco, who was played by actor Michael Greco, who supports Chelsea. Chelsea is who Ashley Cole plays for, and he's the husband of Cheryl Cole, who's in Girls Aloud with our guest today, Sarah Harding, which links to Girls Aloud and 'Biology'.

Flaws:

Seamless once again.

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 2005

Highest UK Chart Position - #4

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

D:Ream, Things Can Only Get Better

Today's Transcript:

Biology is something you do at school, and is considered to be one of the sciences, which means that it might sometimes involve the wearing of safety goggles. Goggles of a different type are also worn by top swimmers like Duncan Goodhew and Sharon Davies. Sharon Davies used to do 'The Big Breakfast', a bit like Denise Van Outen and Richard Bacon. Bacon, in the world of pork products, is similar to gammon in as much as it's cured. Cured is what you'd hope to be one day if you caught a nasty disease or bug. If you add 'aboo' to 'bug' you get 'Bugaboo', which was a top 10 hit ten years ago for Destiny's Child. Destiny's Child were the band that launched the career of Beyonce Knowles, under the management of her dad Matthew Knowles, who despite the same surname is no relation to Nick Knowles from 'DIY SOS', and who you'll probably see in a big coat bringing in the New Year next to a well-known London landmark in a couple of weeks' time. Thyme spelt with a 'H' and a 'Y' is a herb that's nice when combined with chicken. Chicken is a popular meat throughout much of Northern Ireland, which is also where Peter Cunnah is from, and he was the lead singer of D:Ream, which links to D:Ream and 'Things Can Only Get Better'.

Flaws:

Again, nothing to report.

Tedious Facts:

Released - January 1993 (re-released in January 1994 and May 1997)

Highest UK Chart Position - #24 (#1 and #19 on re-release)

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Ash, Orpheus

Today's Transcript:

If you combine the letters 'D' and 'Ream' you get 'dream', which is what you might have when you're asleep. Sleep is what the Continentals do in the afternoon, and what they call a siesta. Siesta forever is something that Lionel Richie's a big fan of. Lionel Richie made a classic video for his hit song 'Hello', which involved a blind lady making a pottery representation of Lionel's own head. 'Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes' is a song sung by children. Children are our future, and if we teach them well they will lead the way. Weigh of a different type is what you have to do with your ingredients when you're cooking. Cooking is something that Gordon Ramsay and Jamie Oliver both do very well. 'Well done' is something you might say to someone who's just finished their exams, but is also the way that my mum likes her steak. If you remove the first letter of 'steak' you're left with 'teak', which is a type of wood, and 'would' you believe it today's link once again takes us to Northern Ireland which is where the band Ash are from, which links to Ash and 'Orpheus'.

Flaws:

A seamless link for the last Tedious of 2009.

Tedious Facts:

Released - May 2004

Highest UK Chart Position - #13

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

The Grid, Swamp Thing

Today's Transcript:

Ash are from Northern Ireland, which is where we did our last show before we broke up for Christmas. Christmas is a time of giving and receiving, and is also a celebration of the birth of baby Jesus. Jesus Christ has the same initials as Jason Connery, whose dad is Sean Connery, who famously played James Bond, and was also the father of Indiana Jones. Indiana Jones shares the same surname as Tom Jones, who has had many hits over the years, including 'The Green Green Grass Of Home' and 'Delilah'. Delilah, in Biblical terms, was the wife or girlfriend of Samson, while Samson, first name Sidney, is currently number two in the UK singles chart with 'Riverside (Let's Go)'. If you said "let's go to the riverside", people might think you were a big fan of Middlesborough Football Club, who for the time being are managed by Gordon Strachan. Gordon Strachan shares the same surname as Michaela Strachan, who after all these years is still working with animals. Animals were placed in the ark in pairs by Noah. The word 'pairs' is an anagram of 'Paris', which is an old city with lots of windy streets, unlike Milton Keynes, which on a map looks like a big grid. When you think of the word 'grid' in the context of great dance records from the 90s, you think of The Grid, which links to The Grid and 'Swamp Thing'.

Flaws:

Samson and Delilah weren't married, and in fact had just recently met and fallen in love when the famous Bible story involving him cutting his hair took place.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 1994

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Hear'say, Pure And Simple

Today's Transcript:

A grid is what you wouldn't want to drop your keys down, as you'd then have to try to fish them out with a coathanger. A coathanger is also useful for getting your keys out of your car if you've locked them inside. Inside is the opposite of outside, which was the title of a hit for George Michael. George Michael is Greek-Cypriot, and performed on the 'X-Factor' alongside eventual winner Joe McElderry. Joe McElderry is from the same part of the world as his mentor Cheryl Cole. Coal is something that we've been going through a lot of recently with the extreme winter weather. Extreme weather is the area of expertise for our resident weather expert Dominic Byrne, who also reads the news. 'News' rhymes with 'Muse', who are one of the few rock bands who come from Devon. Devon is the only county in England to share a border with Cornwall. Cornwall is where Rick Stein runs a restaurant, specialising in fish. Fish is best in batter and served with fish, salt, vinegar, and, in my opinion, curry sauce. The reason why people like fish and chips is possibly because it's pure and simple, and when you think of those words in the context of pop music from yesteryear you think of Hear'say, which links to Hear'say and 'Pure And Simple'.

Flaws:

'Pure' is defined by the dictionary as "free from anything of a contaminating kind; free from extraneous matter; free from foreign or inappropriate elements; spotless or unsullied; free of or without guilt". Laden with fat and calories, fish and chips hardly fits that description!

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Feeder, Come Back Around

Today's Transcript:

Former Hear'Say member Kym Marsh is in 'Corrie', and also on the cover of this week's Heat magazine. Heat magazine came with us yesterday go-karting with N-Dubz. N-Dubz's Dappy is officially a cheat when it comes to go-karting, and everybody knows that cheats never prosper, and he is a cheater. A cheetah of a different type is a very fast land mammal which can be seen running in places like Africa, which is bad news for you if you're an antelope. An antelope shouldn't be mistaken for an envelope, which is what you write the address on when you're sending a birthday card. Card is a material that's used a lot in children's telly for sticking glitter onto and making pictures involving crepe paper and glue. Glue is made from horses, while horses were the transport of choice for cowboys across most of the Wild West in the olden days of America. America is where Kanye West is from, and it was Kanye West who was called a jerk or something by President Barack Obama, who took over from George W Bush this time last year as the new leader. 'Leader' rhymes with 'Feeder', who are a Welsh rock band fronted by Grant Nicholas, and if Grant from Feeder had fallen out with his next-door neighbour and made it up with him again, he might say "come back around", which links to Feeder and 'Come Back Around'.

Flaws:

Barack Obama actually called Kanye West a jackass, not a jerk, after his outburst at the MTV Awards.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 2002

Highest UK Chart Position - #14

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Arrested Development, People Everyday

Today's Transcript:

Around is the direction that you need to travel in while navigating a roundabout, ad in the UK this needs to be done clockwise, while on the Continent it's anti-clockwise. Wise is a word you'd associate with an owl. The plural of 'owl' is 'owls', which is the nickname of Sheffield Wednesday. Wednesday was yesterday, which means that today must be Thursday, and the day that we're going to the cinema. The word 'cinema' is nearly an anagram of 'Mancini' which is the name of the new manager of Manchester City. Manchester City play their home matches at Eastlands, which shouldn't be mistaken for Gracelands, which is the home of the late great Elvis Presley, who would have just turned 75. If you take the two numbers that make up 75 and add them together you get 12, which is also known as a dozen, and a popular amount in the retail of eggs. Eggs come from chickens, which, by and large, are stupid birds. Birds are the passion of former madam Heidi Fleiss, and in some ways you could say that they always have been. Bean, first name Sean, does a lot of voiceovers and telly stuff, and is seen and heard by millions of people every day, which links to Arrested Development and 'People Everyday'.

Flaws:

It may be a slight exaggeration to say that Sean Bean is seen by millions of people everyday...

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1992

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

The Prodigy, Out Of Space

Today's Transcript:

Arrested Development are from America, and feature a rapper who goes by the name of Speech. 'Speech' rhymes with 'beach', which is a good place to go if yyou want to go swimming or get a suntan. If you're going sunbathing you should always put on lots of suncream to give you a high level of protection. 'Protection' was the title of a hit for Massive Attack, who are from Bristol, which weirdly is where we went on Thursday to see the film 'Avatar'. 'Avatar' was a big winner at the Golden Globes last night in Los Angeles, which was hosted by Ricky Gervais, who used to do stuff on Radio 1 years ago with our very own Mary Ann Hobbes. Hobs are what you'd find on the top of your cooker, and these will most likely be gas or electric. Gas and electric bills are going to be a big problem for a lot of people this winter because of the extreme cold weather. 'Weather With You' was a big hit in 1992 for Crowded House, who are from New Zealand. New Zealand is also where Zane Lowe is from, and is somewhere that is famous for its lamb. Another place that is famous for its lamb is Wales, which has a lot of little villages and towns, one of which is called Flint, and Flint, first name Keith, is a member of The Prodigy, which links to The Prodigy and 'Out Of Space'.



Flaws:

Seamless today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 1992

Highest UK Chart Position - #5

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Oasis, Acquiesce

Today's Transcript:

Space is what you need a lot of in the car if you're going on a long journey with children. Children are basically just small people, who grow up to be adults. If you remove the 'A' and 'L' from 'adults' you're left with an anagram of 'stud', which is a place where they breed horses. Horses are really big and live in stables full of hay. "Hey boy, hey girl, superstar DJs, here we go" is a famous line from a massive hit years ago for the Chemical Brothers. Chemical Brothers' Ed used to go out with Lily Allen, who's in the nominations for this year's Brit Awards alongside Lady GaGa, Florence and the Machine and Pixie Lott. Pixie Lott isn't really a pixie, and is actually a full-sized person. If you swap the first letter of 'person' for an 'M' you get 'Merson', as in Paul Merson, who used to play for Arsenal, Middlesborough, Villa and Portsmouth, to name but four. 'Four Weddings And A Funeral' is the title of a classic Richard Curtis film from years ago starring Andie MacDowell and Hugh Grant. Hugh Grant also starred alongside Renee Zellwegger in 'Bridget Jones' Diary' in the year 2001, which was just one year after Oasis topped the chart with 'Go Let It Out', which links to Oasis and 'Acquiesce'.

Flaws:

Seamless once again.

Tedious Facts:

This track has never been released as a single, and is the second time in a year that Dave has Linked to a non-chart choice (excluding the team's own parodies played to celebrate their achievement as longest-running breakfast show), the last time being another Oasis song, 'The Masterplan'.

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Dream Warriors, My Definition of A Boombastic Jazz Style

Today's Transcript:

I still don't know what 'acquiesce' means, but that's okay cos I don't know what 'facetious' means either. 'Either' is a word that is often combined with 'or', but not ore that you find during mining, or oar that you might use to paddle a boat. A boat was the transport of choice for Vikings years ago when they used to embark on their missions of plunder and pillage. 'Pillage' rhymes with 'village', which, according to the saying, is somewhere where you might expect to find an idiot. An idiot from America is what you'd most likely call an 'American idiot', which was the title of a big hit years ago for Green Day. It's actually green day today, bin-wise, where I live, which means that they take all your garden stuff and waste from the green bin. If you reverse the letters in the word 'bin' and then add a 'K' on the front you get 'knib', which is the bit that you write with on a fountain pen. A fountain pen is probably what Shakespeare used to write plays with, and what composers like Gustav Holt used to compose classical music. Gustav Holt is best known for writing The Planets, which is a classic track and is appreciated everywhere round the world from Cardiff to Canada. Canada is where the early 90s hip-hop pioneers Dream Warriors were from, which links to Dream Warriors and 'My Definition of A Boombastic Jazz Style'.

Flaws:

The word 'nib' has no 'K' on the front. Additionally, the fountain pen as we know it was not invented in Shakespeare's time; although a design for one was commissioned as long ago as the 10th century, there are no recorded references to the 'quill pen' until 1636, twenty years after he died. Also, The Planets cannot really be referred to as a 'track', as it is a suite consisting of seven movements.

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #13

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

S Club 7, Reach

Today's Transcript:

The Dream Warriors also did 'Wash Your Face In My Sink', which is what I'm sure they'd let you do if you were staying overnight at their house. 'House' is the title of a big American drama series starring Hugh Grant, who used to be a foppish comedy actor in this country before making it big over there, and actually becoming quite cool. Cool is how your fridge should be, and if it isn't cool, it's not working. If you swap the first letter of 'working' for a 'D' you get 'Dorking', which is a small town in Surrey. Surrey is where the Top Gear track is, and where The Stig puts cars through their paces. 'Paces' is an anagram of 'space', which is what you'd be looking for in a car park. A car park is somewhere that you might need to take a ticket, and in that respect is a bit like the theatre. I've got to go to the theatre soon, as part of a Christmas present for the wife. The word 'wife' is only one letter away from 'wi-fi', which is how my computer works when it's wireless. 'Wireless' is what they used to call the radio in the olden days, and because it was wireless you could listen to it anywhere, like in the park or the garden or the beach. 'Beach' rhymes with 'reach', which links to S Club 7 and 'Reach'.

Flaws:

It isn't Hugh Grant in 'House', it's Hugh Laurie. Additionally, early radios were known as a 'wireless' because the broadcasts were transmitted to the set without the use of wires, not because the sets themselves didn't have wires, and so they couldn't normally be carried to the park or beach as Dave describes.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 2000

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Blur, Charmless Man

Today's Transcript:

Reach is something you might struggle with if you're really short and got a job stacking shelves. Shelves at home are something that can be tricky to erect, and are best done by someone who's handy, like Handy Andy. Handy Andy used to be on the telly with Carol Smilie, who's from Scotland, like Lorraine Kelly. 'Kelly' rhymes with 'jelly', which is often served at children's parties along with ice-cream. Ice-cream needs to be kept in the freezer, along with frozen vegetables and ice-cubes. Ice Cube used to be in NWA along with Dr Dre. Dr Dre isn't a real doctor, unlike Dr Hilary Jones, who is a real doctor, but not a very good skater. If you swap the 'K' in 'skater' for an 'L' you get 'Slater', as in Stacey Slater, the 'Eastenders' character who's played by actress Lacey Turner, who won a National Television Award for Continuing Drama. Drama is what I did at GCSE, and managed to get a grade C. Sea of a different type is what separates Wales from Ireland, and in turn Ireland from America. America is where Sigourney Weaver is from, who's worked with gorillas. Someone else who's worked with Gorillaz is Damon Albarn from Blur, which links to Blur and 'Charmless Man'.

Flaws:

As many texters pointed out, it's an ocean rather than a sea that separates Ireland and America.

Tedious Facts:

Released - May 1996

Highest UK Chart Position - #5

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Destiny's Child, Bootylicious

Today's Transcript:

A blur is all you'd see if you accidentally ended up weaing somebody else's glasses. Glasses of a different type are much-needed in pubs in order to be able to serve drinks. If you remove the first letter of 'drinks' you're left with 'rinks', which is the plural of the word for somewhere that might be good for ice-skating. Skating on ice is what you need to master if you're going to be any good in 'Dancing On Ice'. 'Ice Ice Baby' was the title of a number 1 mega-hit years ago for Vanilla Ice, who's now trying to resurrect his career by teaming up with the twin talents John and Edward. John and Edward are both from Dublin, and follow in the musical footsteps of Ronan Keating and Bono. Bono likes to wear sunglasses a lot, even when he's indoors, and in that respect shares something in common with Ivana Trump. Trump is what you don't want to do in church or if you're meeting your in-laws for the first time. Time changes depending on where you are in the world, and this is the main cause of jet-lag. Jet-lag is something that must really affect globetrotting international stars like Bruno Tonioli and Beyonce Knowles. Beyonce Knowles used to be in a band called Destiny's Child, which links to Destiny's Child and 'Bootylicious'.

Flaws:

Seamless link today, although texters complained about Dave's likening Jedward to Bono, and similarly it was an interesting comparison to put Bruno Tonioli on the same level of stardom as Beyonce...

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Len, Steal My Sunshine

Today's Transcript:

Destiny's Child was also the band that launched the career of Kelly Rowland, who had a big hit last year with David Guetta. David Guetta shares the same initials as Danny Glover, who starred in the 'Lethal Weapon' films alongside Mel Gibson, who also starred in 'Braveheart', where he had to pretend to be Scottish and wear a kilt. 'Kilt' rhymes with 'silt', which can clog up a river. River Phoenix is the name of the late actor who starred in various films including 'Stand By Me'. 'Stand By Me' is a song title that links the artists Ben E King, Oasis and Shayne Ward. A ward is somewhere that might be full of patients and beds and stuff in a hospital. Hospital is where you end up if you get really sick. 'Sick' rhymes with 'Dick', as in Dick Turpin, who was the most famous of all the olden days highwaymen. Highwaymen used to hold up their victims by saying "stand and deliver". The liver is an important organ in the body, while 'The Body' is the nickname of Elle MacPherson, who is a supermodel from Australia. If a massive huge cloud blocked out all the nice weather that Australia gets, the locals might say "did you steal my sunshine", which links to Len and 'Steal My Sunshine'.

Flaws:

Watertight today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - December 1999

Highest UK Chart Position - #8

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Black Box, Ride On Time

Today's Transcript:

Len Goodman is a judge on 'Strictly Come Dancing', which is currently on tour around the UK, although not necessarily featuring Len Goodman tonight, which I think is in Nottingham. Nottingham is the city that Robin Hood is most commonly associated with, and he used to steal from the rich and give to the poor. If you swap the first letter of 'poor' for a 'D' you get 'door', which is the normal way that people enter and exit a building, except for those weird buildings that have revolving doors, which are way more dangerous and we don't like them. If you drop the first letter of 'them' you're left with 'hem', which is something you'd find on the bottom of a dress or skirt. Skirt is a type of steak, while steak is very popular on menus in Argentina. Argentina is who we had a war with years ago when they tried to steal the Falkland Islands. Islands are surrounded by water. The word 'water' is only one letter away from the word 'waiter', which is someone that will take your order. Order is crucial in a wedding with regards to the hymns and blessings and readings and stuff. 'Reading' is spelt exactly the same as 'Reading', who've got West Brom in the fifth round of the FA Cup. If you were planning to cycle to the match and didn't want to be late for kick-off, you'd have to make sure that you 'ride on time', which links to Black Box and 'Ride On Time'.

Flaws:

Once again watertight.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1989

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

The Black Crowes, Hard To Handle

Today's Transcript:

A black box is what they put in planes as a flight recorder so that they can piece together what happens if the plane crashes. 'Crash' was a big hit for The Primitives, who are from Coventry. Coventry is also where The Enemy are from and their leder is a nice man called Tom. If you double the name 'Tom' you get 'tom-tom', which is something you might have in your car, but also something you might find on a drumkit. 'Kit' was the name iof the car in 'Knight Rider', which was a series starring David Hasselhoff. David Hasselhoff is friends with our very own Scott Mills, who sometimes hosts the Lottery. 'Lottery' rhymes with 'pottery', which is an ancient art form that involves clay, water and a spinning wheel. The wheel was one of the first things in the world to be invented, and it was as a result of this that they also invented stuff like cars and motorbikes. Motorbikes are statistically quite dangerous, which is why you should always wear a helmet. 'Helmet' rhymes with 'pelmet', which is something you might find near your curtains. Curtains is sadly what happened to Kate Hudson's marriage to Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes, which links to The Black Crowes and 'Hard To Handle'.

Flaws:

Another seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #39

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

All Saints, Pure Shores

Today's Transcript:

'Hard to handle' is how you might describe a very slippery eel. The plural of 'eel' is 'eels', which was the name of an American band who had a big hit entitled 'Novocaine For The Soul'. Seoul, spelled differently, is the capital of South Korea, who hosted the Olympics in 1988. 1988 was also the year that Rihanna and Leon Jackson were born. 'Bourne Identity' was the name of a book that was made into a film starring Matt Damon, who also starred in the film 'Invictus', which has Morgan Freeman playing Nelson Mandela. Nelson Mandela once had a celebrity 'Ground Force' garden makeover at his home in South Africa by Tommy Walsh, Charlie Dimmock and Alan Titchmarsh. Alan Titchmarsh is one of the hosts of 'Pop Star To Opera Star', alongside Myleene Klass who used to be in Hear'say, which is a band that Javine Hylton never made it into. She was on 'Celebrity Come Dine With Me' the other night, along with Donal MacIntyre, who was on 'Dancing On Ice' last year, which is hosted by Holly Willoughby and Philip Schofield, who also does 'Celebrity Mr and Mrs' with Fern Britton, which this weekend had Mikey from Boyzone on, who's also doing 'Dancing On Ice' this year with Heather Mills, who is obviously best known for being a charity campaigner. Charity begins at home, and home is where Liam Gallagher lives with his missus Nicole Appleton from All Saints, which links to All Saints and 'Pure Shores'.

Flaws:

Technically speaking it is true that Javine Hylton didn't make it into Hear'say, but that's mainly because she didn't audition for them - she is best known for auditioning in, and reaching the final stages of, the series of 'Popstars' that produced Girls Aloud. Also, Heather Mills is somewhat better known these days for her former husband than for her charity work...

Tedious Facts:

Released - February 2000

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

(N_Red)

[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Young Disciples, Apparently Nothin'

Today's Transcript:

Pure Shores featured on the soundtrack to the film 'The Beach', which starred Leonardo DiCaprio and Tilda Swinton. Swinton is an area of Salford, which is the city that gave us Shaun Ryder of the Happy Mondays. Mondays are possibly the most depressing day of the week, unlike Fridays which in my opinion are simply the best. 'Simply The Best' is a karaoke favourite, which is murdered on a nightly basis in pubs around the country. The term 'the country' normally refers to that which isn't urban, where you tend to get more farms and cows and stuff. Cowes is a place on the Isle of Wight, which is popular with boaties. 'Boaties'rhymes with 'goaties', which is a type of goat-like beard, made fashionable by people like Toadfish from 'Neighbours' and our very own Dominic Byrne. Burn is what you do to candles, which are made from wax. Candles are what they used in the olden days to see what they were doing, like, for example, in the manger in Bethlehem for the birth of baby Jesus. Jesus then grew up to be popular and massively well-respected and had lots of young disciples, which links to Young Disciples and 'Apparently Nothin''.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #13

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[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Bomfunk MCs, Freestyler

Today's Transcript:

'Nothing' was the title of the biggest hit from the band A, whose former member Daniel P Carter is now Radio 1's very own in-house Lord of Rock, and also randomly co-wrote the McFly hit 'Star Girl'. 'Star Girl' mentions the planets, while 'The Planets' was also a famous piece of music by the classical composer Gustav Holst. Gustav Holst is a famous European artist who's sadly no longer with us, and in that respect shares something in common with Vincent Van Gogh, who only had one ear. If you add the letters 'S' and 'H' onto the front of 'ear' you get 'shear', which is what you do to a sheep. Sheep are the primary source of wool, which is used around the world to make things like jumpers, scarves and hats. Hats are worn on the head, and are vital for protection in conditions of extreme cold. Coldplay are fronted by Chris Martin, who has a daughter called Apple. Apple was used in a lot of experiments by Sir Isaac Newton when he was discovering gravity. 'Gravity' was a track written by the aforementioned Chris Martin but actually recorded by Embrace. 'Embrace' is another word for a hug, which is what we gave yesterday to Peter Andre, who first had a hit with 'Mysterious Girl' in 1996. If you fast-forward four years from 1996 you get to 2000, when Bomfunk MCs released 'Freestyler', which links to Bomfunk MCs and 'Freestyler''.

Flaws:

A couple of historical problems today. Van Gogh did not only have one ear, he just cut off the lower part of his left earlobe; and Newton did not use apples in experiments, there is just an anecdotal story about him observing the effect of gravity when dropping an apple.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 2000

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

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[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Fatboy Slim, The Rockafeller Skank

Today's Transcript:

Freestyler was released in the year 2000, which was the start of a new millennium. 'Millennium' was the title of a Robbie Williams track from two years earlier, which had a video where he was acting like James Bond. James Bond has a licence to kill, and is a Special Agent with the code 007. 'Seven' is the title of a film starring Morgan Freeman, who was on Radio 1 with Fearne last week. Weak of a different type is the opposite of strong, and the way that some people, not me, like their tea. Tea is grown in places like China and India, and traditionally was picked by ladies with baskets on their back. 'Back For Good' is a classic track by Take That, while 'Take That' is the title of a track by Wiley, who used to be mates with Dizzee Rascal. Dizzee Rascal performed on stage at the Royal Albert Hall last year with Shirley Bassey, who's from Tiger Bay in Cardiff. Cardiff is the capital of Wales, who lost to England in the Six Nations on Saturday in the sport of Rugby Union, which is played with an odd-shaped ball. Ball, first name Zoe, is married to Norman Cook, and Norman Cook is otherwise known as Fatboy Slim, which links to Fatboy Slim and 'The Rockafeller Skank'.

Flaws:

Much argument ensued as to whether the new millennium did indeed start in 2000, and technically speaking it started in 2001, although Dave refused to be moved on his assertion.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 1998

Highest UK Chart Position - #6

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[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Touch And Go, Would You...?

Today's Transcript:

Fatboy Slim supports Brighton and Hove Albion, who are nicknamed The Seagulls. Seagulls seem to be getting bigger, and are now sometimes the size of a small dog with wings, and like to steal ice-cream and chips. Chips are made from potatoes, which grow in the ground, a bit like carrots. Carrots are a good source of beta-carotene, which helps you see in the dark. The dark is what some people are scared of, and this is why they might like sleeping with the lights on. 'Sleeping With The Lights On' was a hit for Busted, whose former member Matt Willis is big mates with David Gest. David Gest has odd hair, which I think he sprays on. On is what you don't want the light switch to be when you're changing the bulb. A bulb of a different type is part of a flower, a bit like the stem and the stamen. 'Stamen' rhymes with 'shamen', as in The Shamen, who according to the quiz machine in the pub were formed in Aberdeen in Scotland. Aberdeen is the capital of the North Sea oil industry, where searching for oil is a rough science which you might describe as being a bit touch and go, which links to Touch And Go and 'Would You...?'.

Flaws:

It's a bit of an exaggeration that carrots help you see in the dark, but not untrue as such, so technically seamless.

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 1998

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

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[Nicola_Red]

Today's Tedious Link:

Third Eye Blind, Semi-Charmed Life

Today's Transcript:

Touch and Go was released in 1998, the year that the World Cup was held in France. France is a large country, famous for its fine wines and quality cheese. Cheese can be hard or soft, and 'hard' and 'soft' are two words that can also be applied to contact lenses. Contact lenses are, for many people, an alternative to wearing spectacles. Spectacles should always be recommended by a qualified optician who's an expert in examining your eyes. 'Eyes Wide Shut' was a weird film starring Tom Cruise and his wife at the time Nicole Kidman. Nicole Kidman is from Australia, and in that respect shares something in common with Hugh Jackman and Dannii Minogue. Dannii Minogue is having a baby, like our very own Carrie, whose last day with us is this coming Friday and is likely to involve some tears. If you swap the first letter of 'tears' for a 'B' you get 'bears', which are large dangerous animals that like to eat salmon. Sam and Mark are two presenters who fisrt met each other on 'X-Factor', and I would imagine that both Sam and Mark enjoy their showbiz lifestyle and would describe themselves as leading if not a fully charmed life then certainly a semi-charmed life, which links to Third Eye Blind and 'Semi-Charmed Life'.

Flaws:

Sam and Mark didn't meet on 'X-Factor', it was 'Pop Idol'. Additionally, Nicole Kidman was actually born in Hawaii, although brought up in Australia.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #37

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