[Lawrie]

Right as the board is quiet i thought its time to open the Problem pages....


"DRLOZBAKERs rumpty tumpty love clinic" is now open!!!


if you have a love problem or a problem post a message and ill come up with some expert advice!!..no problem is too difficult for me to solve..or too embaressing




ps... DRLOZBAKERs personal fee goes to the "Stop Scott mills comedy fund"

[kendra k]

right then- here i go. my exboyfriend is a bastard, and i like his old friend. what do i do?

[Lawrie]

my advice........dont worry..he is your EX..my advice is to go for his friend..your ex should be (pardon the pun) behind you..its quite ok to go for this bloke..dont worry about it

[Benjoo]

i have a massive knob. i find it hard to get my hand round it when................opening my bedroom door. what is your suggestion

[Gromit]

There had to be somebody who "lowered the tone" - lol! ...Funny tho!



James.

[Jonny Hoare]

i'm a woman and i have no penis- is this a problem

[wannabe_mrs_moyles]

there's a boy i know, and he's fab! problem is he fancies my friend but she already has a boyfriend, but she did admit to fancying the blokey i fancy...but the one i like doesn't fancy me (i don't think) and i made myself look like a right divvy a while ago when i was *ahem* carol singing with him. WHAT DO I DO?!?!

oh, and i just completely failed my history exam, any ideas on how to avoid having my history teacher kill me?

[Stephen.]

Kill him/her first!!! HAPPY TO HELP.

[wannabe_mrs_moyles]

but she's really big and scary! she's really funny though when she's in a good mood but when she sees my exam paper and sees that i've written loads about khrushchev instead of gorbachev she'll kill me! i hate russia i hate russia la la la i hate russia yeaaah ooh i hate rushia i hate russia ... all together now!

[Stephen.]

Don't worry yaself luv, if it helps... I'VE FAILED MY HISTORY EXAM AS WELL - HOORAY

[Jonny Hoare]

it may be of little consolation but
Russian history can be summed up by the struggle for the perception of the works of marx and the strive for the utopian state of communism- which has not or was not achieved.

1917 feb- prov govt- end of tsar nick- rar ra raspautin
1917 nov- bolshevik - with vladimir ilyich ulyanov (lenin) and trotsky (kinda like a russian timmy mallet) and stalin (kinda like a russian max bygraves)

[kendra k]

what about pre-revolution russia? another strong theme throughout russian history is the stuggle for indentity- are they european or not? this has been a issue for centuries and still is so. look at putin licking the eu's shoes...

geschichte ist sehr spass!

and i emailed new boy, no response yet.

[Jonny Hoare]

stolypin- legend could have saved the russian kingdom
died to young