The place where everyone hangs out, chats, gossips, and argues
By The Cornishman
#16606
I did something last night that I have not done for at least a week-I danced in a nightclub.Well,to be more precise I moved my thumbs and feet in spasmic unison.Now,I'm not sure whether my interpretation could be strictly classified 'house' or 'techno',but if you can imagine Stephen Hawking in Supermarionation you will get the general idea.

I was however upstaged by a group of trawler mens wives(average age 40)who,despite thier best efforts,looked like the subjects of Salvadore Dali's lesser known Masterpiece 'Gibbons in Lipstick'-One of whom had perfected what can best be described as a spasm.This involved performing a Jack Douglas/Norman Wisdom stylee backwards thrust of the shoulders and simultaneous hokeycokey of the right leg whenever she flitted back momentarily to conciousness.

No prizes for guessing that she ended up with an extra mouth at the back of her head after a particulary vicious thrust sent her Arse over Tit onto the parquet.Thing is,being the nearest I offered my assistance- only to be told by the fishlady to '* off',and that I was the 'worst dancer she had ever seen'.....
By LE_VEY
#16636
ever heard of a short message??
By The Cornishman
#16658
Of course I have,ever heard of an attention span?Got anymore obvious queries?you cannot contract the human form of mad cow disease by wearing a leather jacket by the way and ice cream does not make a good substitute for shaving cream.Hope this has helped.
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By Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog
#16728
if i could just go somewhere where they didnt play mystic i would be happy. it forces me to drink...... a lot.
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By matt5cott
#16779
Bar + Mates + You = Prop

I believe that scientific method should work well for you, I have been a user of the "Prop the bar" theory for many years, always works a charm for me 8)