[The Cornishman]

Having an idle hour to enjoy this afternoon I wandered into an amusement arcade.I can not fathom the joy gleaned from those machines which slide eternaly back and forth laden with huge quantities of two pences-but joy there is.Of course we all know that such devices are so heavily rigged in the houses' favour that one hasn't a hope in hell that the invitingly placed 'Gareth Gates' badge or Ninja turtle watch will plop into the win tray,but one has gots to have a go!
I dug into my pockets and retrieved a King's ransom of two pence pieces (haven't been working all summer- not over generous with the gratuities you see). I circled the machine in true SS stylee,hands behind back,examining each 'Station' for chances of a healthy return until I found one that had a veritable Ken Dodd's worth teetering on the rim. I timed my shots carefully but to no avail.
Then I applied my coup de grace- the 'three shot whammy'- stretching every finger tendon to the limit I began simultaneously releasing three 2p's at a time...the kiosk bloke eyed me steelily, he knew I was onto something.After about fifteen minutes and £3 later I hit the jackpot! Sixteen pence in 2p's tumbled like lemmings into the wintray! Come to daddy!I tossed a 2p high into the air,spun on my heels and gave the kioskman a Roger Moore smirk as I made my exit.
Gareth..you're Next....

[Everlast]

Shit man, that deserved and acadamy award

[Jonny Hoare]

i want a gareth badge but not before i nail that bllooody derby day game
come on number 6
come on number 6

[Lawrie]

Cornishman is up for the "Best post of 2002" with that total and utter genius masterpiece



i have to say the best machine are in William Hills "Virtual gambling" machine where you can bet on a dog race and see if your dog wins!

[The Peter Kay Fan]

anyone played on an "itbox"?

think of me, as ive helped someone do a lot of work on the pcs of them, theyre the bollocks, top fun

[Morals]

I think it's time for a new petition - Cornishman for Prime Minister / King / God / Whatever

[Funky Drummer]

hell yeah! I'd vote in that, the man has talent goddamit.

[Mr Dion]

*bows down before u*

[Jonny Hoare]

Not for king of Cornwall- I is that

[Everlast]

No Jonny you are the "ming" of cornwall

[The Cornishman]

Cornishman is up for the "Best post of 2002" with that total and utter genius masterpiece

*beep* man, that deserved and acadamy award

I think it's time for a new petition - Cornishman for Prime Minister / King / God / Whatever

hell yeah! I'd vote in that, the man has talent goddamit.

[Paul]

I was playing on an arcade in some dingy restaurant abroad many years ago, it was the game where you the little space ship in the middle of the screen and have to spin round to blow up planets or sommat like that.

Anywaaaay...... while I was playing on afforementioned arcade machine the back and forth 2p machine paid out about 15 quids worth and no one had even touched the machine !

Well at the time it was judged to be about 15 quid now thinking back it was more likely to be a quids worth.

Paul

[Lawrie]

Comedy god of Chrismoyles.net

i award that to him

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

dr loz do i take it you find the cornishman funny then?

[Sidders]

I just wish he'd write shorter posts, by the time I get to the 3rd line I give up.

[rattis]

dr loz do i take it you find the cornishman funny then?

All cornish men are funny. Its even funny when i go there and other people cant understand them, apart from us locals.