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If you were asked to judge a Wet TShirt Contest, would you accept?

Yes
18
78%
No
5
22%
User avatar
By Uglybob
#21753
1. Gwyneth Paltrow is allegedly dating Chris Martin of Coldplay. Now usually I find rockstars always have the pick of women but I feel that he went wide of the mark picking her.

2. Now that David Dickinson has decamped to 8pm (yes i know he will be back in the morning), it means having to find other morning programmes to watch. Now I have two choices but after watching Fridays episode my mind is made up.

a/ Through The Keyhole - Tell me, have you ever guessed who the person is before they reveal who it is. 9 times out of 10 im still none the wiser as to who it is after they do. The other day they had some woman called Ruby Hammer, presumably they chose her house cos she had a slightly amusing name. She was big in make up we were told.

but the winner was
b/ THE LOVEBOAT RETURNS - Now I happen to be looking around for crap at around noon because Channel 4 keep repeating Will & Grace, the most unfunniest pile of bilge since Absolutely Fabulous, that I switched and saw this. Right the plot is theres people on the boat and most of them are in love. The plots make Emmerdale look professional. Fridays included some potion that made the persons wish come true. One fella had wished to see everyone naked. He forgot that meant his mum too. Oh how I laughed. But the piece de resistance was the Special Guest Star which was ALF. Fantastic.
Alf is a long lost great who should be brought back.
Image

3. How long can you go - Hear'Say
Hear'Say hurtled down the charts faster than you can say "Dolls House" with their insipid trash. They mimed again on TOTP blaming the energetic dance routine as to why they had to mime. Do dance routines sell songs. Did it make a blind bit of difference to the viewers. No, the record company said that Myleene boobs were overshadowing the other 3 tits who stand at the back and pretend that they are straight.
Theres only one thing than being in Hear'Say - Being Kym Marsh - Jesus where to start. You leave a band cos you cant hack it after 6 months bearing in mind it took more than 6 months to get into it. Then she marries Jack Ryder (Adam Rickitt minus the biceps). who is 6 years her junior, presumably as a babysitter though it would be hard to figure which one is the kid. She looks like she could smother him to death. Then sell your pictures to OK Magazine and to top it all off, get Sky to record it. Wouldnt be surprised if you see in 3 months
SKY BOX OFFICE PRESENTS - SEX WITH JACK & KYM
Thats right the intimate couple will perform any act you wish with the touch of your digital remote control. The red button will make Jack put on the condom while the unique 16 angles with Sky Interactive will feature ass cam on both participants.

4. Titters Tittley, I thought brought his name into shame when he jumped at the chance of judging and drenching the Miss Wet TShirt contest at Telford. As with Moyles, I thought this thing was done away with. So thats what the poll. If you were asked to judge a Wet TShirt Contest, would you do it?
By David
#21754
uglybob wrote:a/ Through The Keyhole - Tell me, have you ever guessed who the person is before they reveal who it is. 9 times out of 10 im still none the wiser as to who it is after they do. The other day they had some woman called Ruby Hammer, presumably they chose her house cos she had a slightly amusing name. She was big in make up we were told.


I barely ever know who the person is too... I am sure the people guessing get told who it is. I am ususally sitting there thinking, (in a mark and lard style) whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo?
User avatar
By a_girl_from_mars
#21757
1. I thought he was supposewd to be going out with Natalie Imbruglia (sp?)?
User avatar
By Morals
#21781
..and now, for the audience and the people at home, but NOT our panel, here's whose house it is!

There's no way they panel don't know, look at the questioning:

Panelist 1 - Is it someone who works with their hands?

Annoying presenter bloke who's name I can't think of - No

Panelist 2 - Is it Jamie Oliver?

Annoying presenter bloke who's name I can't think of - Yes
By The Peter Kay Fan
#21788
uglybob wrote:The other day they had some woman called Ruby Hammer, presumably they chose her house cos she had a slightly amusing name. She was big in make up we were told.


I would presume she is the astranged wife of the famous Scottsman Mr. McHammer.

No-one ever knew McHammer's first name, though he made it quite big in the rap world, posing as an amarican "born n raised" rapper - sporting parachute pants.

Later on in his carreer, the McHammer image was holding him down, so he decided to go for MC Hammer, he kept his old Mc Hammer name registered, so no-one else could pinch it - can't touch this.
By LE_VEY
#21835
I saw that love boat, with alf in it, and there was truely nothing else on tv to watch especially as my digital has decided to pack in, not good!
User avatar
By Gordon_the_Cromag
#21854
HeartBreak high is utopia of morning tv.

natalie imbruglia is going out with the singer from silverchair,she has been with him for bout 2years.
By The Cornishman
#21860
Re:The Keyhole-Of course aire Grossman has to make the clues much easier these days...
"Who would live in a house like this lets take a look at the evidence....a photograph of Ruby Hammer,a letter addressed to Ruby Hammer,and Ruby Hammer walking around with a distinct air of ownership"

© Frank Skinner 1999
By The Peter Kay Fan
#21861
Gordon_the_Cromag wrote:natalie imbruglia is going out with the singer from silverchair,she has been with him for bout 2years.


Daniel Johns :wink:
User avatar
By Jonny Hoare
#21862
I wish Titley would die as my now ex Grilfriend was from Telford and any mention brigns backs tears to hoare's eyes

but heh judging a wet T shirt competiton would be good. i'd be like father jack

"More water"


Still this an illegal Uglybob thread. back off Bob oir else there will be UN Sanctions placed upon you
User avatar
By Sidders
#21889
uglybob wrote:2. Now that David Dickinson has decamped to 8pm (yes i know he will be back in the morning), it means having to find other morning programmes to watch.

Tune into challenge TV for back to back family fortunes, followed by Beadle's about; a lost TV gem.
uglybob wrote:a/ Through The Keyhole - Tell me, have you ever guessed who the person is before they reveal who it is. 9 times out of 10 im still none the wiser as to who it is after they do.

As you say, 90% of the time i've never heard of the person in question, but the other week they had 2 main clues; comedy and birds. Obviously it had to be Bill Oddie!
User avatar
By Jonny Hoare
#21891
I haven't heard of many of the panellists in years....

Ferchrissake- Jonathon Morris, Toyah Wilcox and Lord Linley

why................................................

Bob remove yourslef to the 34th paralell please
User avatar
By Uglybob
#21934
Challenge Tv- I dont have Sky
User avatar
By jc
#22041
The Peter Kay Fan wrote:
Gordon_the_Cromag wrote:natalie imbruglia is going out with the singer from silverchair,she has been with him for bout 2years.


Daniel Johns :wink:


Who has a temporary form of arthritis. - jc
User avatar
By a_girl_from_mars
#22044
I thought they had split up. although it had nothing to do with arthritis.
User avatar
By jc
#22051
No, apparently they're still together, just apart while she's off in another country I guess.

I assume the poll split is mostly male "yes" votes to female "no" votes. - jc
User avatar
By a_girl_from_mars
#22058
I think I voted yes so I must be odd
User avatar
By Mr Dion
#22092
well i voted no so i must be odd also..
User avatar
By kendra k
#22189
i didn't vote because i am too chaste to be anywhere near the question.
User avatar
By Uglybob
#22266
i wouldnt do it, it would decrease any dignity i would have left.