- Tue Apr 20, 2004 10:16 pm
#241908
1. N*E*R*D - She Wants To Move 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Franz Ferdinand - Matinée, 3. Beyonce Knowles feat Jay-Z - Crazy In Love, 4. Blink 182 - I Miss You, 5. BUZZ OFF - Stealers Wheel - Stuck In The Middle, 6. Eminem - Lose Yourself 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Narcotic Thrust - I Like It, 8. U2 - Beautiful Day, 9. The 411 feat Ghostface Killah - On My Knees 8:00 NEWSBEAT 10. The Verve - Bitter Sweet Symphony, 11. The Streets - Fit But You Know It, 12. Britney Spears - Toxic, 13. Boogie Pimps - Somebody To Love, 14. The Ordinary Boys - Week In Week Out 8:30 NEWSBEAT 15. Usher feat Ludacris - Yeah, 16. Divine Inspiration - The Way, 17. The Strokes - 12:51, 18. Pink - Last To Know, 19. Take That - Pray (Tedious Link), 20. Keane - Everybody’s Changing, 21. Kelis - Trick Me, 22. D12 - My Band 9:30 NEWSBEAT 23. The Black Eyed Peas feat Justin Timberlake - Where Is The Love, 24. The Rasmus - In The Shadows, 25. Snow Patrol - Chocolate
Chris slept in by an hour today and had no late night drinking session to use as an excuse. In fact he did virtually bugger all yesterday afternoon and evening - staying in at home on his own while the rain continued to pour down outside. However, instead of passing his time by sorting out his huge piles of CD’s, clothes, rubbish and paperwork, Chris decided to spend the majority of it on Sky Interactive Gamestar playing Darts, Golf, Millionaire Music and Virtual Greyhound Racing. He then followed this up with a Weightwatchers microwaveable meal and three hours on Sky Vegas’s Super Keno, before settling down in front of the telly to watch 8 Mile on DVD...rock a loo la. There was no return call or text from Vermin though, so his and Chris’s Bolton - Leeds Xbox rematch will have to wait at least another 24 hours. Chris also managed to catch a bit of Rebecca Loos on Richard and Judy during this hectic afternoon schedule, although rather than the interview itself, he was more interested in the fact that the novelty of “You Say We Pay” is yet to wear off on Richard Madeley. Dave was gutted that he missed the interview, although his chances of seeing it were somewhat disadvantaged by the fact he tuned in at 6 o’clock, just after the programme had finished. While Chris was spending his afternoon playing games on Sky, Dom was at home changing nappies and trying to stop baby Finton crying. He suggested that in the interests of the show it might be a good feature to have Chris babysit Finton for one afternoon, giving him and his wife a bit of a break from the stresses of parenthood. Chris said he’d just take Finton back to his <s>flat</s> 8 bedroom maisonette in Brixton and kick his ass on the Xbox all afternoon long...either that or a trip to the swings in the park. Chris said he didn’t want to risk that though as he wouldn’t know which one was Finton (out of all the other babies there). Dave correctly pointed out that the laws of human development normally mean no 9 month old babies would be out swinging on the swings in the local park. Dom said Chris would be able to recognise Fin though, although Chris disagreed and (caringly) said that Dom’s baby does not resemble him or his wife in anyway whatsoever. Chris said he could prove he’s nothing like Dom, as he doesn’t open cans of beer or fart during the cricket. In fact he said the only similarity they share is the fact they are both bald. Chris said he’d sponsor Dom to pick his baby out of a box of 100, adding shortly afterwards (after fearing he might have peed him off a bit) that he wishes Dom and Nic the best success in the world as loving parents. Now you may remember (if you’re as sad as me) that when Rachel filled in as producer of the afternoon show for Will last year (around this time actually - when Cafe Morgan shut down) she got into a discussion with Chris about the knitting phenomena going on amongst the female staff at Radio 1 - in particular herself and Hannah Brown (Coxy’s ex-producer I think). Today the subject arose again, as Chris found out that Hannah has no time to meet with Rache later today...as she is too busy knitting. Rachel said there was nothing wrong with that, as she thinks “knitting is the new clubbing”. Chris replied by saying that Radio 1 was a shambles - as instead of rock n roll drug taking, beer swigging orgies going on upstairs...there is Jo Whiley filing her nails and a knitting convention going on in the office. Despite being a keen knitter herself (and I didn’t think I’d ever write that on a chrismoyles.net reviews page) Rachel wasn’t at all happy that Hannah had cancelled their meeting this afternoon.
Rachel - She’s blown me out!!
Chris - Eh? Oh maybe I’ll make the meeting after all then
Dave (sarcastically) - guh huh
Yesterday you may remember Chris was talking about the dreadful impressions he heard from callers on Vernon’s show over the weekend. They were invited to ring in and do their best celebrity impersonations down the phone (do I smell a cheesy local radio competition here) with the top two going head to head in an on air conversation. Chris played out clips from this conversation - it was Frank Spencer vs Dale Winton. Now the Frank Spencer impression was one of the worst imaginable but at least you had an idea of who he was trying to be. Dale Winton on the other hand...well to be honest it was more like Dot Cotton. Chris thought the clip he played was genius and Rachel agreed that it was so terrible it was funny. Dave said Culshaw would have to keep on his toes with those two about. Chris also heard the new Ordinary Boys record (Week In Week Out) on Vernon’s show over the weekend and said he liked it so much he was going to play it this morning.
Dave - God you’re playing lots of your favourite records this morning
Chris - Oh no to be fair I’m also playing a lot of crap that I really actually don’t like
(starts the record)
Buzz Off this morning was a real classic - the top 8 hit from May 1973, Stuck In The Middle by Stealers Wheel. Rache was first to buzz on 3 mins 07, Dave second on 3:21 and Aled third on 3:50. The listeners didn’t buzz in (90% voted buzz on) so the full 4 minutes and 21 seconds of the song was played. Vernon texted in to say he prefers the Louise version. Only thing I remember about that cover was the video, can’t possibly remember why...hmmm. With the big Monaco - Chelsea match tonight and Claudio Ranieri in the sports news this morning, Chris messed about with his Dombot weather machine to try and recreate Claudio’s name using the wonders of modern technology. He used Dom saying “o” and “ieri” alongside Dombot weather clips of him saying “Cloud” and “Rain”. It sort of worked. During this experimental link Dom could be heard shouting out “Sanyo” in the background - although believe it or not it is actually Sony. Chris had more Dom sound bites - of rubbish, dank and muggy. Dave said if he added “er” after dank, the German word for thank you would be created. I mean c’mon, it really doesn’t get much better than that Sony judges...you don’t get that kind of genius on Wogan’s show do ya?
DOM AND UMA:
(Dom will meet Uma this afternoon around 2)
Today is Dom’s latest Hollywood interview with big footed Kill Bill beauty Uma Thurman. He’s toddling off down to a posh London hotel to meet her this afternoon around 2 o’clock, with the interview now looking like lasting for just 10 minutes, rather than the 20 originally planned. Dom predicted he’ll get the wind up windmill sign from her people after just five mins, although Rachel said he should reply with a windmill sign back in their direction (with Uma accompanying with the gesture if possible). Chris said he isn’t interested in seeing Kill Bill (both 1 and 2) from the clips he’s seen, but everyone who has seen it thinks he’ll love it. I was the same at first but Chris you should go and see this movie. I’m slightly biased as I think Tarantino is a god but nevertheless it’s still a must see movie (ignore the critics slagging it). Chris said he will buy the DVD of Volume 1 and watch it on Wednesday night. Dave wanted to know more about the gore involved before watching it as he said he gets squeamish at just Casualty. Dave talked more about the ear scene in Reservoir Dogs, saying he had to look away. I know Dave still hasn’t seen Pulp Fiction but I suspect he’d be just as squeamish at the scene where Mia (Uma) accidentally OD’s and Vincent (John Travolta) has to revive her. This morning it was time for Dom to prepare questions for Uma with Chris and Dave. He didn’t want to turn her big feet into an issue, so said he’d tried to stay away from that line of questioning. I think I agree with Chris when he says Uma is fit, while still maintaining the ability to look a bit ropey and raggy from time to time. Chris showed some topless shots of her from Zoo magazine to Dom and Dave, which were meant by comments of “Wowee”, “Crumbs” and (of course) “loverly knockers”. Dom thought he would ask Uma if she was interested in giving him and his wife Nic a break, by spending the rest of the afternoon looking after young Fin for them. Other killer questions suggested were favourite *, toothbrush colour, Mr Men character, pie filling, type of pencil, fizzy drink and dinosaur. These plus the usual cheese and Back To The Future questions and the new question of the moment - “Would you like to have a drink with the team in a traditional British boozer?”. One text also suggested that Dom ask Uma if she wants to become the official international ambassador for Reverse-a-Word. No doubt there will be all the best bits from Dom’s big interview with Uma on tomorrow mornings show. Check back here for all the news on it tomorrow night.
During half time a vicious debate raged in the studio about bikes and personal advertising, eventually turning into a bit of a heated (but funny) slanging match between Chris and Dave. The situation is as follows:- Chris wants to hire a bike so that he can cycle into work in the mornings. He doesn’t want to buy one however as he knows that the novelty will wear off in a month and he’ll then be left with a huge mountain bike in the corner of his flat, sitting there collecting dusk. Both Dave and Jules thought it would be a lot easier for him to buy a bike for 200 quid than hire one for 50 quid a week (which Dom told Chris was the general asking price in London). Jules told him if he was that desperate to buy one, the internal BBC staff website offers special rates on bikes. Chris wanted to know since when the BBC has stood for The British Bicycle Corporation.
Dave - We used to be run by Greg Bike!!!
(Chris and Rachel laugh)
Dave said he could always buy a bike then sell it by sticking an advert in the local newsagents or paper. This sparked off the whole big row as Chris said sticking his address on a newsagents window in Brixton was ludicrous and virtually an advert asking for people to rob his flat. Dave got a bit agitated and Chris could tell. He said just like when Tony Blackburn got a bit worked up all those years back, today would go down in history - the day that Dave lost it live on the air.
ONE BIG WEEKEND IN DERRY - VIP TICKETS:>>>
One Big Weekend in Derry is of course this weekend - and if you don’t know that where the feck have you been. The show will be live from there on both Friday and Monday morning, although today the focus was very much on who will join the team there. Briony from St Ives was today’s contestant on the big OBW VIP competition after 8 o’clock. Dom interrupted the conversation to say he used to go to school in St Ives. Him and Briony then compared what schools they went to. Briony said she was actually from a little village just outside St Ives.
Chris - Right
Briony - It’s a bit inbred...
(Chris laughs)
Dave - We wouldn’t agree with you there
Briony - I’m not though obviously
Chris - Right
Today’s password for friends of the callers is “Hello Radio One, I can’t wait to see *insert name of favourite OBW act*, please give me my tickets now!!” (it just rolls off the tongue doesn’t it). Unsurprisingly James (Briony’s friend) ballsed it up big time, then didn’t even have the guts to admit it was his fault. He put the phone down on Chris as he berated him, so Chris called him a gutless wonder. Briony then turned on Chris a little bit, saying he was a meany cos he wouldn’t give her tickets. Chris said that speaking from a radio presenters point of view, she sounded fit and all that but he just couldn’t let her go cos rules are rules. No winner going through today to Friday’s VIP final draw then. To stand a chance of winning and being in that draw then go to Option 6 on 08700 100 100 or register at Radio 1 ONLINE. Also online is an application form for any workplaces in Derry who listen to the show and want to be in with a chance of winning only the second ever Chris Moyles Approved Workplace award on Monday morning. Qualifiers start after 9am tomorrow - click here to apply for you and your work colleagues (note: only if your workplace is in Derry).
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
DAVE a sales rep from Chorley in Lancashire 2
SARAH who sells health club memberships in Belfast 1
Daves Tedious Link
The Wonderstuff Size Of A Cow - Cows and all things cow like are referred to as being bovine - The word “bovine” shares the same word beginning as Bovril, which is a hot drink and something that you put on toast - Toast rhymes with Ghost, which was a 1990 film starring Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze, which did much to make pottery sexy - Sexy MF was a 1992 hit for Prince and The New Power Generation - The New Power Generation featured the vocal talents of Rosie Gaines, who scored a big hit in 1997 with Closer Than Close - Close is another word for humid or muggy - Muggy shares many of the same letters as the word “moggy”, which is colloquial slang for a cat - Cat Stevens shares the same surname as Rachel Stevens, who used to be in S Club - Club is a word associated with feet, chocolate biscuits and golf - Golf involves tees - The Tees is a famous river, as is the River Ganges - and the River Ganges is a special place where thousands of people go every year to wash themselves, cleanse themselves and pray - Which links us to Take That and Pray
**Chris ended the show today by playing the glockenspiel to Chocolate by Snow Patrol, and then to the beat of the show’s end theme tune. Dave therefore took the responsibility upon himself to plug Jo Whiley’s show and then ambitiously tried to hit the end vocal, but was miserably short...by about twenty seconds.**
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Chris slept in by an hour today and had no late night drinking session to use as an excuse. In fact he did virtually bugger all yesterday afternoon and evening - staying in at home on his own while the rain continued to pour down outside. However, instead of passing his time by sorting out his huge piles of CD’s, clothes, rubbish and paperwork, Chris decided to spend the majority of it on Sky Interactive Gamestar playing Darts, Golf, Millionaire Music and Virtual Greyhound Racing. He then followed this up with a Weightwatchers microwaveable meal and three hours on Sky Vegas’s Super Keno, before settling down in front of the telly to watch 8 Mile on DVD...rock a loo la. There was no return call or text from Vermin though, so his and Chris’s Bolton - Leeds Xbox rematch will have to wait at least another 24 hours. Chris also managed to catch a bit of Rebecca Loos on Richard and Judy during this hectic afternoon schedule, although rather than the interview itself, he was more interested in the fact that the novelty of “You Say We Pay” is yet to wear off on Richard Madeley. Dave was gutted that he missed the interview, although his chances of seeing it were somewhat disadvantaged by the fact he tuned in at 6 o’clock, just after the programme had finished. While Chris was spending his afternoon playing games on Sky, Dom was at home changing nappies and trying to stop baby Finton crying. He suggested that in the interests of the show it might be a good feature to have Chris babysit Finton for one afternoon, giving him and his wife a bit of a break from the stresses of parenthood. Chris said he’d just take Finton back to his <s>flat</s> 8 bedroom maisonette in Brixton and kick his ass on the Xbox all afternoon long...either that or a trip to the swings in the park. Chris said he didn’t want to risk that though as he wouldn’t know which one was Finton (out of all the other babies there). Dave correctly pointed out that the laws of human development normally mean no 9 month old babies would be out swinging on the swings in the local park. Dom said Chris would be able to recognise Fin though, although Chris disagreed and (caringly) said that Dom’s baby does not resemble him or his wife in anyway whatsoever. Chris said he could prove he’s nothing like Dom, as he doesn’t open cans of beer or fart during the cricket. In fact he said the only similarity they share is the fact they are both bald. Chris said he’d sponsor Dom to pick his baby out of a box of 100, adding shortly afterwards (after fearing he might have peed him off a bit) that he wishes Dom and Nic the best success in the world as loving parents. Now you may remember (if you’re as sad as me) that when Rachel filled in as producer of the afternoon show for Will last year (around this time actually - when Cafe Morgan shut down) she got into a discussion with Chris about the knitting phenomena going on amongst the female staff at Radio 1 - in particular herself and Hannah Brown (Coxy’s ex-producer I think). Today the subject arose again, as Chris found out that Hannah has no time to meet with Rache later today...as she is too busy knitting. Rachel said there was nothing wrong with that, as she thinks “knitting is the new clubbing”. Chris replied by saying that Radio 1 was a shambles - as instead of rock n roll drug taking, beer swigging orgies going on upstairs...there is Jo Whiley filing her nails and a knitting convention going on in the office. Despite being a keen knitter herself (and I didn’t think I’d ever write that on a chrismoyles.net reviews page) Rachel wasn’t at all happy that Hannah had cancelled their meeting this afternoon.
Rachel - She’s blown me out!!
Chris - Eh? Oh maybe I’ll make the meeting after all then
Dave (sarcastically) - guh huh
Yesterday you may remember Chris was talking about the dreadful impressions he heard from callers on Vernon’s show over the weekend. They were invited to ring in and do their best celebrity impersonations down the phone (do I smell a cheesy local radio competition here) with the top two going head to head in an on air conversation. Chris played out clips from this conversation - it was Frank Spencer vs Dale Winton. Now the Frank Spencer impression was one of the worst imaginable but at least you had an idea of who he was trying to be. Dale Winton on the other hand...well to be honest it was more like Dot Cotton. Chris thought the clip he played was genius and Rachel agreed that it was so terrible it was funny. Dave said Culshaw would have to keep on his toes with those two about. Chris also heard the new Ordinary Boys record (Week In Week Out) on Vernon’s show over the weekend and said he liked it so much he was going to play it this morning.
Dave - God you’re playing lots of your favourite records this morning
Chris - Oh no to be fair I’m also playing a lot of crap that I really actually don’t like
(starts the record)
Buzz Off this morning was a real classic - the top 8 hit from May 1973, Stuck In The Middle by Stealers Wheel. Rache was first to buzz on 3 mins 07, Dave second on 3:21 and Aled third on 3:50. The listeners didn’t buzz in (90% voted buzz on) so the full 4 minutes and 21 seconds of the song was played. Vernon texted in to say he prefers the Louise version. Only thing I remember about that cover was the video, can’t possibly remember why...hmmm. With the big Monaco - Chelsea match tonight and Claudio Ranieri in the sports news this morning, Chris messed about with his Dombot weather machine to try and recreate Claudio’s name using the wonders of modern technology. He used Dom saying “o” and “ieri” alongside Dombot weather clips of him saying “Cloud” and “Rain”. It sort of worked. During this experimental link Dom could be heard shouting out “Sanyo” in the background - although believe it or not it is actually Sony. Chris had more Dom sound bites - of rubbish, dank and muggy. Dave said if he added “er” after dank, the German word for thank you would be created. I mean c’mon, it really doesn’t get much better than that Sony judges...you don’t get that kind of genius on Wogan’s show do ya?
DOM AND UMA:
(Dom will meet Uma this afternoon around 2)
Today is Dom’s latest Hollywood interview with big footed Kill Bill beauty Uma Thurman. He’s toddling off down to a posh London hotel to meet her this afternoon around 2 o’clock, with the interview now looking like lasting for just 10 minutes, rather than the 20 originally planned. Dom predicted he’ll get the wind up windmill sign from her people after just five mins, although Rachel said he should reply with a windmill sign back in their direction (with Uma accompanying with the gesture if possible). Chris said he isn’t interested in seeing Kill Bill (both 1 and 2) from the clips he’s seen, but everyone who has seen it thinks he’ll love it. I was the same at first but Chris you should go and see this movie. I’m slightly biased as I think Tarantino is a god but nevertheless it’s still a must see movie (ignore the critics slagging it). Chris said he will buy the DVD of Volume 1 and watch it on Wednesday night. Dave wanted to know more about the gore involved before watching it as he said he gets squeamish at just Casualty. Dave talked more about the ear scene in Reservoir Dogs, saying he had to look away. I know Dave still hasn’t seen Pulp Fiction but I suspect he’d be just as squeamish at the scene where Mia (Uma) accidentally OD’s and Vincent (John Travolta) has to revive her. This morning it was time for Dom to prepare questions for Uma with Chris and Dave. He didn’t want to turn her big feet into an issue, so said he’d tried to stay away from that line of questioning. I think I agree with Chris when he says Uma is fit, while still maintaining the ability to look a bit ropey and raggy from time to time. Chris showed some topless shots of her from Zoo magazine to Dom and Dave, which were meant by comments of “Wowee”, “Crumbs” and (of course) “loverly knockers”. Dom thought he would ask Uma if she was interested in giving him and his wife Nic a break, by spending the rest of the afternoon looking after young Fin for them. Other killer questions suggested were favourite *, toothbrush colour, Mr Men character, pie filling, type of pencil, fizzy drink and dinosaur. These plus the usual cheese and Back To The Future questions and the new question of the moment - “Would you like to have a drink with the team in a traditional British boozer?”. One text also suggested that Dom ask Uma if she wants to become the official international ambassador for Reverse-a-Word. No doubt there will be all the best bits from Dom’s big interview with Uma on tomorrow mornings show. Check back here for all the news on it tomorrow night.
During half time a vicious debate raged in the studio about bikes and personal advertising, eventually turning into a bit of a heated (but funny) slanging match between Chris and Dave. The situation is as follows:- Chris wants to hire a bike so that he can cycle into work in the mornings. He doesn’t want to buy one however as he knows that the novelty will wear off in a month and he’ll then be left with a huge mountain bike in the corner of his flat, sitting there collecting dusk. Both Dave and Jules thought it would be a lot easier for him to buy a bike for 200 quid than hire one for 50 quid a week (which Dom told Chris was the general asking price in London). Jules told him if he was that desperate to buy one, the internal BBC staff website offers special rates on bikes. Chris wanted to know since when the BBC has stood for The British Bicycle Corporation.
Dave - We used to be run by Greg Bike!!!
(Chris and Rachel laugh)
Dave said he could always buy a bike then sell it by sticking an advert in the local newsagents or paper. This sparked off the whole big row as Chris said sticking his address on a newsagents window in Brixton was ludicrous and virtually an advert asking for people to rob his flat. Dave got a bit agitated and Chris could tell. He said just like when Tony Blackburn got a bit worked up all those years back, today would go down in history - the day that Dave lost it live on the air.
ONE BIG WEEKEND IN DERRY - VIP TICKETS:>>>
One Big Weekend in Derry is of course this weekend - and if you don’t know that where the feck have you been. The show will be live from there on both Friday and Monday morning, although today the focus was very much on who will join the team there. Briony from St Ives was today’s contestant on the big OBW VIP competition after 8 o’clock. Dom interrupted the conversation to say he used to go to school in St Ives. Him and Briony then compared what schools they went to. Briony said she was actually from a little village just outside St Ives.
Chris - Right
Briony - It’s a bit inbred...
(Chris laughs)
Dave - We wouldn’t agree with you there
Briony - I’m not though obviously
Chris - Right
Today’s password for friends of the callers is “Hello Radio One, I can’t wait to see *insert name of favourite OBW act*, please give me my tickets now!!” (it just rolls off the tongue doesn’t it). Unsurprisingly James (Briony’s friend) ballsed it up big time, then didn’t even have the guts to admit it was his fault. He put the phone down on Chris as he berated him, so Chris called him a gutless wonder. Briony then turned on Chris a little bit, saying he was a meany cos he wouldn’t give her tickets. Chris said that speaking from a radio presenters point of view, she sounded fit and all that but he just couldn’t let her go cos rules are rules. No winner going through today to Friday’s VIP final draw then. To stand a chance of winning and being in that draw then go to Option 6 on 08700 100 100 or register at Radio 1 ONLINE. Also online is an application form for any workplaces in Derry who listen to the show and want to be in with a chance of winning only the second ever Chris Moyles Approved Workplace award on Monday morning. Qualifiers start after 9am tomorrow - click here to apply for you and your work colleagues (note: only if your workplace is in Derry).
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
DAVE a sales rep from Chorley in Lancashire 2
SARAH who sells health club memberships in Belfast 1
Daves Tedious Link
The Wonderstuff Size Of A Cow - Cows and all things cow like are referred to as being bovine - The word “bovine” shares the same word beginning as Bovril, which is a hot drink and something that you put on toast - Toast rhymes with Ghost, which was a 1990 film starring Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze, which did much to make pottery sexy - Sexy MF was a 1992 hit for Prince and The New Power Generation - The New Power Generation featured the vocal talents of Rosie Gaines, who scored a big hit in 1997 with Closer Than Close - Close is another word for humid or muggy - Muggy shares many of the same letters as the word “moggy”, which is colloquial slang for a cat - Cat Stevens shares the same surname as Rachel Stevens, who used to be in S Club - Club is a word associated with feet, chocolate biscuits and golf - Golf involves tees - The Tees is a famous river, as is the River Ganges - and the River Ganges is a special place where thousands of people go every year to wash themselves, cleanse themselves and pray - Which links us to Take That and Pray
**Chris ended the show today by playing the glockenspiel to Chocolate by Snow Patrol, and then to the beat of the show’s end theme tune. Dave therefore took the responsibility upon himself to plug Jo Whiley’s show and then ambitiously tried to hit the end vocal, but was miserably short...by about twenty seconds.**
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