[AndyJ]

Has anyone here written a best man speech before? I have to write one for my brother, he is getting married in april so thought I should start working on it quite soon

Any one got any tips?!?

[Vivienne]

Is there not a website where you can get ideas for speeches? I'm sure I heard that somewhere on my local radio. Also, you may want to try "Brides" magazine. I've never read it, or needed to, but I'm sure they must cover all things related to a wedding.

[AndyJ]

There are websites but you have to pay, I am sure I will sign up to one eventually but I was just wondering if anyone has any 'experiance tips' that they could share!

[wurzel]

Has anyone here written a best man speech before? I have to write one for my brother, he is getting married in april so thought I should start working on it quite soon

Any one got any tips?!?

I've never done one, what with only being 19, but here's my advice:

Try not to sound like your too nervous, or the guests will pick striaght up on it.
Tell funny stories about things he's done, but nothing that your parents and/or grandparents dont know, and shouldnt know
Tell how they met, and any strange (good way) things that he did to try and impress her.
Stories about his childhood (would be better if your older)

Hope that helps.

[AndyJ]

yeah thats cool... My uncle owns a printing company so he has offered to print any photos at any size, so I am going to get some pics blown up to 6ft of Embarrassing moments and a projector with other pics on it....

Ive not really done any public speaking before (apart from when i worked on a radio station, but you couldnt see anyone so it was easy!) so its going to be a bit nerve-racking!

[Vivienne]

Try a bottle of vodka as well beforehand, then you won't care what you say!

[wurzel]

yeah thats cool... My uncle owns a printing company so he has offered to print any photos at any size, so I am going to get some pics blown up to 6ft of Embarrassing moments and a projector with other pics on it....

Ive not really done any public speaking before (apart from when i worked on a radio station, but you couldnt see anyone so it was easy!) so its going to be a bit nerve-racking!

Na you will be fine. You will have had a couple of drinks by the time it comes to your speech. So the nerves will hopefully have gone.

[foot-loose]

Id think that being honest in those situations would work - the crowd will laugh at jokes that arn't really that funny cos they will be polite - this would make you feel better.

So if you get up, look at them and say something like "Jeez, there's a lot more of you from up here!" that will get a small laugh, then "right, i've never done this before so bear with me - we could all be aboard a sinking ship..." another small laugh.

Something along those lines would relax you and the audience.

Try and not get stuck on having it all written down on cards in front of you - if you are telling stories that you already know, then you don't need to have them written down, you just tell them. If you have loads of cards, you will get them jumbled up and end up reading them.

If it helps, forget that there is a large crowd there - focus on your brother instead of the whole room.

Also, people will understand that you are not used to it and that you have probably been sweating over it for months - try to take that understanding as a comfort.

Id recommend NOT being drunk - if you make a tit of yourself then you could end up regretting that for quite a while! (That said, id have a couple before hand !)

[Yudster]

Key points.
1 - Speak from the heart. Anything funny you say will be soon forgotten, but genuine feeling is always remembered.
2 - Don't tell jokes - be amusing if you can (and want to), but anecdotal humour only, jokes never work in that scenario
3 - As Footy said, don't be drunk by the time it comes around
4 - Most important of all - keep it short. A minute and a half of genuine honest thoughts and feelings is a billion times better than five minutes of stuttering forced humour and contrived "stories".

Oh also don't forget to thank the bridesmaids and the rest of the wedding party (you'll probably have gifts to hand out) - this will fill time too. Reading out messages and cards isn't necessary though, and can be deadly dull for the rest of the guests.

Good luck!

[Ballbag]

Begin with the line.

"Fornication.......... .. oh, er... sorry..... For an occasion like this I thought I'd say a few words".

Jonny Ball used that at Zoe Balls wedding, and if it's good enough for him.

My speech at my wedding was a poem, but not a soppy one, but a funny one. It was about 5 sheets of A4 long, and took nearly 6 months of on and off writing to complete. But it made 4 people cry, 2 of my mates literally with laughter, and 2 old dears at the soppy bits, one who came up to me afterwards properly blubbing her eyes out. Might be worth a go if you've got time.

If you wanna pull one of the bridesmaids, the nail your speech.

[Ballbag]

I actually used this when I was best mant to my brother.... Mrs B cringed.


"My girlfriend made me promise not to put any rude double entendres our inuendos in my speech... which is a shame, because last night when we were in bed I came up with a good one and stuck it in, but she told me to take it out straight away..... spoil-sport."

[wurzel]

I actually used this when I was best mant to my brother.... Mrs B cringed.


"My girlfriend made me promise not to put any rude double entendres our inuendos in my speech... which is a shame, because last night when we were in bed I came up with a good one and stuck it in, but she told me to take it out straight away..... spoil-sport."

That is absolutely quality!!!

Can i have permission to use that if im a best man and have a girlfriend at the same time?

[Vivienne]

I don't know why people get a "kick" out of the innuendos. At my cousin's wedding years ago, some random was hinting about the "wedding night" (as if that had been the first time for the 2 of them - it rarely is).. the thing was the bride & groom had, at one point, been "at it" across a photocopier. They couldn't have done any worse.

[wurzel]

I don't know why people get a "kick" out of the innuendos. At my cousin's wedding years ago, some random was hinting about the "wedding night" (as if that had been the first time for the 2 of them - it rarely is).. the thing was the bride & groom had, at one point, been "at it" across a photocopier. They couldn't have done any worse.

Yep, someone's got their head on today

[AndyJ]

Thanks all.... good advice there...

I have heard its about 70% on the groom, 20% on the bride and 10% on the wedding party and thank yous etc etc

my Unc is a excellant speech writer so he is going to give me some pointers i think... it should be good though, i have some quiality stuff on my brother to use....

Ballbag - can i use that line? its cracking!!!!

[foot-loose]

We have a silly sense of humour and it's nice to use it.

It's certainly better than having to tell everyone when a joke has been cracked! That would make the speech a total success!!

[Vivienne]

That's funnily enough what I would do!

[Ballbag]

You can all use what you like, but do quote me as a reference.

I've been best man once, and obviously groom once.

But I love doing speeches, I can't wait to do my next one... I got so many ideas.

Just got to wait for the occasion.

[Yudster]

Zoot........?

[Andy B]

I've been a best man twice - for the same guy!

[S4B]

Zoot........?

Zooty couldn't use Balls it would loose Mr Ballbag's sense of mystery unless he wore a paper bag over his face.

Mind you on a serious note "ZOOTY, don't you dare use that twat best friend of yours!"

[MK Chris]

Who are you to tell him who to use and call his best mate a twat?

That's a bit off.

[S4B]

he is a twat!

[KevinoHeat]

done a best mans speech once, didnt write a thing and played it by ear. Didnt go too bad. Just told everyone that i found it difficult to believe that he was getting married(that he'd even find a gf) but that he couldnt find a better woman to marry. And that i wished them the best of luck in the future.

[Andy B]

That's pretty much on the money there..short and sweet, thank the bridesmaids, thank whoever paid for it and make some sort of gag that it's gonna cost even more than they planned for, take this piss out of the groom (Never the bride, ever, no really, never) and toast the happy couple.

And Lalottie - no I didn't use the same speech twice, thankfully I didn't have to give a speech at either of them for reasons far too numerous and complicated to go into.