[Boboff]

Now this is a bit of a Vordie type thread but hey.

Edith mentioned on air Moyles aught to do a Parody of the above song.

It has been playing on my mind a bit and thought with you clever people we could have a bit of fun helping Dave out with a few lyrics.

I think it would be rather funny as either "if I were a girl" or a real "if I were a boy"
e.g.

If I were a girl I'd go shopping every day, phone my mother even though I had just seen her, take four hours to get ready, insist my arse looked big in it, shopped in 12 shops just to find a pair of jeans that nearly fit and are a size 12.

or if I were a boy I'd scratch my arse and smell my finger, eat snot, scratch my balls, and sniff, be allergic to drinks coasters, use deodorant instead of showering.

etc.

[foot-loose]

... I totally agree with whatever plan is being hatched above.

[Yudster]

........or if I were a boy I'd scratch my arse and smell my finger, eat snot, scratch my balls, and sniff, be allergic to drinks coasters, use deodorant instead of showering.

etc.

Thing is, the actual song, although maybe slightly more polite about it, pretty much says exactly that, so it wouldn't really be a parody. I think they need to do If I Had A Boy.

[Munki Bhoy]

Unless they made it about Pinocchio.

[chrysostom]

Moan on about how girls are dirty sluts and tramps, wheel out every stereotype you can think of.

Then use the excuse that 'oh, girls are immature women - women are real females who can handle men'

That song annoys me.

[Yudster]

I do love the song (which is unusual, Beyonce isn't generally my thing at all) but I agree about the stereotype, its a bit annoying.

[chrysostom]

It's just the unashamed sexism in the lyrics that annoys me.

and she's with Jay-Z - i'm sure life can't be that bad.

At least elude to these things rather than coming out and saying them, i think i'd like the song if the lyrics weren't so awful.

[MK Chris]

I don't like the song full stop, mainly because of the tune, as opposed to the lyrics. Which is odd, because unlike Yudwuk, I usually do quite like Beyonce.

[Johnny Karate]

Not having worked it out, but I'm sure the chord sequence is the same as "Patience" by Take That.

[Boboff]

If I were a girl, I check my breasts for lumps every day.
But not in a pervy way.

doesn't scan but hey, not does the original and I got to say Breasts.*sniggers.

[Zoot]

Not having worked it out, but I'm sure the chord sequence is the same as "Patience" by Take That.

Very similar, but I think they are -
Patience - Em, G, C (Added 9th), D
If I was a boy - Em, C, G, D
So just the C and G the other way round

[Johnny Karate]

Not having worked it out, but I'm sure the chord sequence is the same as "Patience" by Take That.

Very similar, but I think they are -
Patience - Em, G, C (Added 9th), D
If I was a boy - Em, C, G, D
So just the C and G the other way round

aaaahhh, thought it sounded similar, cheers.

[foot-loose]

Very similar, but I think they are -
Patience - Em, G, C (Added 9th), D
If I was a boy - Em, C, G, D
So just the C and G the other way round

aaaahhh, thought it sounded similar, cheers.

And you two are straight?

[Boboff]

You are so not!

[Johnny Karate]

Very similar, but I think they are -
Patience - Em, G, C (Added 9th), D
If I was a boy - Em, C, G, D
So just the C and G the other way round

aaaahhh, thought it sounded similar, cheers.

And you two are straight?

Good point well made... I've never heard of those songs Zoot.... I like The Oasis and Foof fighters

[Yudster]

Good point well made... I've never heard of those songs Zoot.... I like The Oasis and Poof fighters

The case for the vilification rests m'lud.

[Johnny Karate]

I've got an alternate version of gladiators in my head now.