[MK Chris]

I refuse to believe an adult person can be that thick. .

Did you not watch BB3 then?

I refuse to watch Big Brother and have done since they started making it.

I've met a few adults who are amazingly thick.

e.g.
An elderly couple complained to me about their house:
"The white roof thing in the kitchen is wrong"
Me: "I'm sorry, what do you mean?"
"The white thing at the top"
Me: "I'm not with you"
"The bit over your head"
Me:"Do you mean the ceiling?"
"Yes. There's a black bit on it"
Me: "Whereabouts?"
"Where it goes down"
Me:"What, the wall?"
"Yes. There's a black bit."
Me: "Does it look mouldy?"
"No, it's just a black space"
me: "You mean a crack?"
"yes, a black thing on the white thing where it goes down to the yellow thing"
Me: "Right - so it sounds like the wall & ceiling are moving away from eachother, leaving a gap"
"Yes."

With my brain hurting, I called someone out to go and have a look.

There was no crack/gap. It was mouldy condensation.

Numpties.

See - they must have been taking the piss.

[Zoot]

A couple of weeks ago I was given an aerial/birdseye photo .jpg and asked to "spin it round so you can see the other side of the building"

[Nicola_Red]

Oh, I could go on with examples of stupidity all day. Just today: me: "would you like to book into the restaurant before your show?" customer: "what does that mean?" take a guess...
Disturbingly, I find that some of the worst offenders are people who book for children's shows. These people are raising the next generation and they struggle with the most simple concepts. It worries me.

[Yudster]

Topher is such a sweet innocent lad.......people are a lot thicker than Jade, unfortunately.

[Blinko Glick]

I find it quitye amazing that there are so many old thickies out there.
How could they survive in today's world being so thick?
Some people i've met over the years can hardly remember to look both ways before crossing a road.
Wouldn't it be great if natural selection still worked even though we try our best to ignore evolution?

e.g. "Duuuuh, I wanna cross da road"
>SPLAT!!<

One less.

[Yudster]

They survive because today's world is tuned to the lowest common denominator, which is why packets of nuts carry the warning "May Contain Nuts", and bags of bananas carry the instruction "Peel before eating".

[Andy B]

There's no such thing as a system proof idiot. I'm constantly reminded of The Asylum in Hitch Hikers Guide where whenever the guy is tempted to venture into it he looks at a sign above the door which bears the instructions found on a packet of toothpicks.

[Johnny 1989]

Topher is such a sweet innocent lad.......people are a lot thicker than Jade, unfortunately.

yep they are, my example from last week:

I was on a bus on the way home when the driver missed the stop before mine (it had been closed the previous week mind), anyway a hoodie came down stairs, and, with the bus traveling at about 25-30MPH the twat pressed the "Open doors in an Emergency" button & jumped out (in a pencil dive stylee & went tumbling along the high road.

Several of the youngsters were laughing as was a bloke in his 20's who kept calling him a fool after he realised what happened. I thought the driver had hit him at first but when the driver pulled up calmly to shut the doors (of which more morons got of while it momentarily stopped) and drove on I had realised what had happened & did chuckle and think to myself (dozy f***er, there's always one), however when I got off the bus and saw all the cars behind I realised what a big accident he would have caused.

Nice to see the gene pool is all in working order in the UK

[Munki Bhoy]

Topher is such a sweet innocent lad.......people are a lot thicker than Jade, unfortunately.

To quote George Carlin, think about how stupid the average person is, then realise that half of them are stupider than that!

[S4B]

She must have put at least some of that on... I refuse to believe an adult person can be that thick. Maybe one or two of them are believable, but not all of them.

Topher, seriously I met her. She was genuinely like that, it really wasn't put on.

My assistant manager - who is brilliant at her job - comes out with things like that.

Some "Beckyisms" as we like to call them:

"Is Madagascar a real place then?" - on finding a copy of a travel guide to Madagascar.

"If I wrap this in tinfoil will it heat up faster in the microwave?"

"Don't be silly, storks don't exist they're just in fairy tales delivering babies"

"You live in Newcastle? I've always wanted to visit Scotland" (me) "seriously Bex shut up now!" "What? Isn't Newcastle the capital of Scotland?"

"What's the point of birds and do you think they ever lay eggs while they're flying about?"



I have many, many more but those are some of my favourites and trust me she doesn't put any of it on. She's an excellent AM though.

[TIAL]

"Don't be silly, storks don't exist they're just in fairy tales delivering babies"

What's wrong with that one? I thought that was a common theme in children's stories?

I realise now I might have inadvertently made myself look like a tit.

[TIAL]

Oh, I've just realised I missed the point. She didn't think stalks existed. I was focusing on the wrong bit.

I'll go first...

Tit.

[foot-loose]

Stalks?

I'll upgrade you to Tit 2.0

[TIAL]

Haha, can you tell I've been on the sauce?

I don't know if that's an insult or a privilege.

[Munki Bhoy]

She still dead then?

[S4B]

Apparently so Munki! I have been inundated by mad people wanting her new book as well.

Can I just point out the following to everyone who thinks I should be held responsible for these things:

1. She insisted the book be published immediately FOLLOWING her death - this was neither my responsibility or choice
2. I did NOT design the cover so it is not my fault her dates of birth and death are on it, again this was her decision
3. I am not being ghoulish by selling her book 2 days after her death and trying to cash in, this was her decision
4. No Jack gets none of the money it is being held in trust for her boys - Seems that maybe she didn't trust him with money that much either.

[Blinko Glick]

Stalks and Storks do exist. Both.

In fact Storks use Stalks to build nests with in europe.

I've never heard of a Stork Stalking, or Talking, but Stalkers Talk to Storks sometimes, i'm sure and maybe even Stalks.

Talking of Stalking Storks & Stalkers, Walking Hawks also use Stalks to nest with.
But Balk at Stalking, as they only have little legs.

[MK Chris]

No Jack gets none of the money it is being held in trust for her boys - Seems that maybe she didn't trust him with money that much either.

I was talking about this last night.. apparently she's saved those lads about a million in inheritance tax by getting married. Maybe she had good advice, or maybe she was actually putting on a thick facade after all.

[S4B]

I think you're confusing being thick with being uninformed Toph.

She had no common sense and very little education but I don't think she was thick. She managed to make a lot of money by using other people's stupidity to want to see more and hear more about her. It's a bit like Jordan. She comes across as being thick but is actually quite a shrewd business woman. I actually think Jade was the same. I've met them both and they were both pretty similar in that respect, they both know/knew how to get what they wanted by giving other people what they wanted. It's a form of prostitution but most of us do that in business anyway.

[MK Chris]

It's a form of prostitution but most of us do that in business anyway.

I've heard that about you.

[S4B]

Oh shush! I am a good girl now. I gave it all up!

[Zoot]

I've been trying to sum it all up -
I think this whole ordeal said more about the modern culture than anything else, and Jade ltd knew this better than anyone. They dealt with the worst and managed to profit from it - take a bad thing and gain from it. Jade wasn't exploited - she exploited us and made sure her kids had a potentially bright future after her passing.
Still doesn't make it any less grotesque, but she knew what she was doing.

[SAV1OUR]

Russell Brand calls her the 'Primark Princess'. Thought that was clever.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7969658.stm

[Munki Bhoy]

Well, if anyone knows about gaining fame from the lowbrow form of entertainment that is reality TV it's the guy who got his break on Big Brother's Big Mouth...

[SAV1OUR]

He's also from Essex.