Off-topic chat. May contain offensive language or images.
User avatar
By MK Chris
#65969
When my Dad first got a computer he didn't know how to operate a mouse.
User avatar
By Nablo.
#65971
Did he pick it up and speak into it "Computer, hello computer"
User avatar
By MK Chris
#65974
:D I wouldn't bloody put it past him, he's a dopey bastard sometimes.
User avatar
By Sidders
#65979
Ha ha! That's hilarious when Scotty does that in Star Trek IV. And when he uses the keyboard he seems to be able to work out how to program transparent aluminium with absolutely no training on the software whatsoever!
User avatar
By Nablo.
#65980
He's not a miracle worker for nothing.
User avatar
By Sidders
#68343
How about this one:


From: QWOYIYZUNNYCGPKY
Re: Urgent Assistance Needed

By way of introduction I am Eng. Farouk Al-Bashar, I represent my family as the oldest son of the Al-Bashar family, who are the descendants of Ibrahim Al-Bashar Ali from one of the oil rich areas in Iraq. Over the years my family has acquired huge sums of money from royalties for the exploration of oil in our region but over the past 15 years, Saddam Hussein and his gangs of bandits have taken our oils without payments and we can not complain as those who did are all dead. In the wake of the Gulf War of 1990, our family withdrew most moneys that remain in coded bank accounts that Saddam did not find and we hide it in a secret chamber underground, where it remained safe until after the war. At the end of Gulf war, we moved the funds into a private vault of a security company in Baghdad, where it was until we collected it a few days ago on the fear of the eminent war with America.

We pray they remove Saddam as he is the cause of much hardship here, but our funds are trapped here and there is no avenue to transfer any amount from Iraq without Saddam knowing. The problem now is how do we transfer the funds totalling US$12.5 Million in cash from here.

We are afraid that with the capacity of the bombs America is coming to Baghdad with nowhere would be safe for the money, so we need you to help in securing a private collection agency who would come to Iraq and collect the money and have them moved to the west, where our family is planning to relocate to as life in Iraq is no longer worth living because of Saddam.

I have to travel lots of miles each day to send an email hoping someone out there would assist this family, if you can we will give you the details of an agency that can lift the funds from here as given to me by a US Marine. The private collection agency would then collect the fund from here and deliver it to you for safe keep. Hoping the American campaign would be successful, we would then come over to your country
for a meeting to share the funds and hopefully start a new life with you as a partner.

For your assistance with this project the family is willing to give you 10% of the funds, however if this does not suit you we are open for negotiation.

We eagerly await your response so we can inform you of the next line of action.

Regards.

Eng. Farouk Al- Bashar
For the entire Al-Bashar family
User avatar
By Nablo.
#68345
lol get stuffed.
User avatar
By MK Chris
#68348
Sidla wrote:Farouk Al-Bashar

Can't even spell his surname right, get him to ask his brother Martin, he must have got loadsa money from the Jacko interview...
User avatar
By Sidders
#68352
That's Bashir you fool.
User avatar
By Morals
#68549
They might as well just write:

"I would like to scam you out of lots money by pretending to ask for help to launder money. If you are a dim-witted retard who thinks you can help, please Email me."

(I know the above example (I'm going to dub it "Postcard from Bagdhad") isn't actually money laundering but most 419 scam Emails are pretty much just that).
User avatar
By Sidders
#68672
Morals wrote:(I know the above example (I'm going to dub it "Postcard from Bagdhad") isn't actually money laundering but most 419 scam Emails are pretty much just that).

No, I assume the Iraq example is a parody of the same idea if you hadn't already worked that out.
User avatar
By Morals
#68760
<sarcasm> Really? I hadn't noticed </sarcasm>
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By Sidders
#68931
I really must stop stating the obvious.
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By Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog
#68949
he says... stating the obvious.

Sat and today are up