[Morals]

Featuring timb as Dr What?

Dr What was sitting in his retardis when the onboard computer (codenamed Uglybob due to it's immense capacity for storing (somewhat useless information) crackled into life....

"Dr, it appears that someone in the past has made a factual statement that you haven't disagreed with"

"This can't be", said Dr What, as his robotic dog K-2 unwillingly humped his leg (K-2 had been reprogrammed by Dr What? sometime ago (Dr What had also renamed the robot dog from Gaspode to K-2 after getting drunk one night on a half of shandy)). "I must go back in time and start an argument".

Dr What? fired up the retardis and started to go back in time. No-one has ever made a factual statement I haven't argued with, thought Dr What?, and I'm not about to let that change - after all, I'm a gaylord, and it's my job to argue with all and sundry.

The retardis flew back through time towards the offending statement and the person who had dared to say something wihtour first running it by Dr What?.....

..to be continued......

[Morals]

Part 2.

There was a look of intense concentration on Morals' face as he studied the Kerplunk! game and tried to decide which stick to remove next. Topher, Magenta and Ickle looked on, hoping he would screw up. As Morals started to remove one of the sticks the doors of the room exploded open and Baby bear burst in, causing Morals to make all the balls in the kerplunk! tube drop. "* BABY BEAR" shouted everyone, "what do you want?".

"I need some help with my homework" Baby bear said, "and I know you guys are smart."

"What's the problem?", asked Morals. "I need to know what shape the Earth is", baby bear said. "The Earth, for all intents and purposes", stated Morals, "is round".

As soon as Morals had said these words there was an almighty crash as a pink phone box materialised halfway through the ceiling.

Dr What? clambered out of the retardis and fell the seven feet or so to the floor. "I am Dr What?, and I am..."

"a gaylord?" asked Magenta. "Yes", said Dr What? "Was it the scarf that gave it away?"

"Actually it was the basque, stockings, suspenders and heels" Magenta replied.

"What about my * ceiling?" shouted Morals, "you've * wrecked it!"

"It's a stupid ceiling anyway", said Dr What?, "look, it's smoking"

"That's dust, not smoke you cretin" Topher snarled at Dr What? "Anyway, that?s not important. "What are you doing here?"

(More coming soon)

[Sidders]

Yet another hilarious installment. Keep them coming!

[Ickle Angel]

Yet another hilarious installment. Keep them coming!

Yeah Morals. Yor not on hols now mate

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

im asuming this is supposed to be funny?

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

i have just been informed that this is supposed to be funny and that quite a few people do find it funny. i apologise for any offense caused by my previous comment and feel i have learnt from this thread. well at least i realise why jim davidson still gets work.

[Morals]

"I am here" announced Dr What (somewhat camply), "because Morals dared to tell Baby_Bear that the world was round, which is nonsense. Everyone knows it's not a perfect sphere!"

"Which is why I said for all intents and purposes, you parasite" replied Morals. "Look, I'm busy, I'm playing kerplunk and I want to go down the pub with Ickle, Toph and Magenta in a bit, do we really need to argue over the roundness of the Earth?"

"Yes we do", said Dr What, "you disagreed with me, you're scum, no, you're HITLER!"

Morals was somewhat disturbed by this - there he was, minding his own business and losing miserably at ker-plunk for the sixteenth game in a row when suddenyl this weird looking bloke wearing women's clothes appears from nowehere and starts screaming at him about not being right in saying the world is round.

"I tell you what", said Morals, "how about we ask a bunch of people what they think, and maybe I can collect together some evidence and stuff - will that be good enough to shut you up?"

"No way, I'm right!" shouted Dr What. "I'm right, you're ugly, Topher's a pr*ck, ickle's eyes need checking and magenta... magenta's a boy!"

Reeling from the disruption in the time space continuum caused by the bizarre logic employed by Dr What to jump from reasoned debate to nonsensical argument, Morals staggered backwards, bumping into the table and causing the buckaroo set that was still on the table from earlier that day to buck, showering everyone in little plastic stetsons and ropes.

'Hmm', thought Morals, 'I can see this will be more difficult than I thought. How will I argue my case with a cretin like this?".....

More soon (sorry this part was a bit lame)

[Sidders]

Can I have a cameo role in the next installment?

[Morals]

I'll write you in. No problem.

[MK Chris]

Can I have a cameo role in the next installment?

you can be the one that offers me a drink when we get to the pub...

[Morals]

It's fiction, but not that far detached from reality...

[Sidders]

You're in luck, my student loan came through earlier this week.

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

[quote="Morals](sorry this part was a bit lame)[/quote]

im so glad you added that cos for a while i thought the quality was slipping.