[Bonanzoid]

And wash your hands. That's key, Yuds! Especially after a dump.

[rustybike]

Go Yuds!

I think you should tell them that... and video their reactions so we can see you kick ass!

[Yudster]

Go Yuds!

I think you should tell them that... and video their reactions so we can see you kick ass!

That might be difficult. I think people have realised that keeping out of my way is a good idea, and there appears to be a Police cordon around my end of the building. I think it happened after I asked them - ever so politely of course - exactly what it was about going to a directory, finding a telephone number, dialling it and reporting a blocked drain, which precluded any of them useless tools from doing it yesterday and made them think that the only way forward was to wait until I was back in the office to do it for them????????!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rustybike]

there appears to be a Police cordon around my end of the building.

Well that's a start... I think you should install a sensor near your desk so that when someone comes even remotely near - deadly music plays... like the Jaws theme... AND if someone then asks you a stupid question you could install the family fortunes "wrong answer" noise. Now THAT would be cool!

[Andy B]

I think a trapdoor that plunges idiots down several hundred feet into a firey death! No one would make the same mistake twice.

[Yudster]

I think a trapdoor that plunges idiots down several hundred feet into a firey death! No one would make the same mistake twice.

Actually very few do anyway. And those that do are never seen again.........

[SAV1OUR]

And wash your hands. That's key, Yuds! Especially after a dump.

Offices do seem to be nortorious for being at war, and this makes disturbing reading, the keyboard in the picture looks like mine too..

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7377002.stm

[MK Chris]

the keyboard in the picture looks like mine too

Amazing, I'm sure very few people have a black keyboard with white labels on the keys.

Oh, wait.. most of the ones at work do.

[Yudster]

If you take more than a tiny bit of notice of stupid articles like this you're an idiot. If it were true, we'd all be dying from typhoid. Last time I looked that wasn't happening. This kind of scaremongering pseudo-medical journalism is the stuff the Nanny State is made of.

[wurzel]

the keyboard in the picture looks like mine too

Amazing, I'm sure very few people have a black keyboard with white labels on the keys.

Oh, wait.. most of the ones at work do.

Wait a minute, that one IS mine.....

[wurzel]

Now I feel good about my obsessive cleaning of my laptop buttons with disinfectant. I even take all the keys off and clean underneath.

OCD anyone???

[wurzel]

Ahem... OCD anyone?

[Zoot]

Ahem...tit anyone?

I thought you'd never offer....

[wurzel]

Ahem...tit anyone?

Just the one? Or are both available?

[Ezza]

Annoying me, my family planning to move my sisters best friend into our house in september. Sleeping in my bed, taking my place. I'm screwed if I don't get into uni..

[Ezza]

No.. but her step-mum's a bit of a bitch. I feel so much pressure now though, cause if I fail, then what am I gonna do in September?

[Bonanzoid]

Telling my Mum about my uni situation. It was...interesting.

[wurzel]

No.. but her step-mum's a bit of a bitch. I feel so much pressure now though, cause if I fail, then what am I gonna do in September?

IF you dont get into uni then she aint getting your room. Surely it should be simple as that?

[Yudster]

Yep, posession is nine tenths of the law - and you have squatters rights! Hopefully you won't need them though.

[Ezza]

Apparently not. According to my sister, if I don't get into uni, her friend still gets my room and I share with my bro.

[Yudster]

Ok - your sister needs a good slap, but basically - revise girl, revise!!!!!!!!!!!

[wurzel]

Apparently not. According to my sister, if I don't get into uni, her friend still gets my room and I share with my bro.

Why cant your sister share with her mate? Its her mate after all...

[rustybike]

Annoying me today; job agencies...

The amount of d!ckheads you come across in the job hunting world are unbelieveable...

1) They leave a message on your phone about a job that they think is really good and they need... no demand... you to call them back straight away, you do, they're not there at the moment - they've gone to lunch (at 11:00 though? Hmmm...) so you wait until the next morning as they still haven't called you back, you call them back, the stupid tart on the phone called "tiffany" says "oh... she's actually gone on holiday now petal". "Thank you... That's just great... did she just forget about me then??" - "Well she has been quite busy" - "Bet she has".
2) You give them your life story about a millions times about what you're looking for... they take it all down on their systems... they ring you back a couple of days later and tell you about a job that doesn't even come CLOSE to what you asked for and you think "did you not hear words exiting my mouth?" - but it's ok though, even though it's not what I asked for, they make it sound great by saying that the job offers discount gym membership... "oh right... thats great! It's about a grand and a half less than what I need, but * it... i'll get down the gym"

Who the hell are these people??? (Apart from * morons). You ask them to do a simple job, so they ask you a "couple of things" to do that job - and they get it completely and utterly wrong!!!
How hard is it to find me a bloody job???

AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH....

[SAV1OUR]

[/kennethwilliams]

[rustybike]

Thanks...