[magenta]

I feel like shit.

Nothing is going right.

I can't do my Maths homework. Well I probably can, but I just feel so shitty that everytime I look at it I want to cry.

Make me happy!!

[Jonny Hoare]

What's the particular maths problem

[magenta]

I have one assignment on Simultaneous Equations, one on Inequalities, & the last one on angles & radians & stuff (a bit easier).

[StaticFish]

fire off a question

[magenta]

Find the coordinates of the points of intersection for the given curve and line

y=x.sq + 4
y=4x + 1

(x.sq = x squared)

[StaticFish]

should the last one be x= ?

[magenta]

No, they're both y=. Because there's an x term in the other bit, you could make it x= if you really wanted to though.

[Jonny Hoare]

x=1 y=5

[The Cornishman]

You need to make an appointment with this guy.

http://pod-135.dolphin-server.co.uk/~ch ... university

[StaticFish]

give up

[Minnie the Minx]

No because

y=x.sq + 4 gives the curve

y=4x + 1 gives the line

I think you work them out in a table.

eg if your x axis scale is -2 - 2

then you have:

x -2 -1 0 1 2
x.sq (put in values)
+4 +4 +4 +4 +4 +4
y (I think you add up the above values)


Then where the line and the curve cross there the co ordinates.

Hope that helps.

[The Cornishman]

Phone up the Nestle information hotline.Flirt with the poor guy at the other end and conclude your conversation about fruit pastels and rolos by inviting him round to yours for some lettuce sandwhiches.

[The Cornishman]

This'll cheer you up-Fact: If you cut a c'ockroaches head off it can go on living for up to six days.
Feel better now.

[The Cornishman]

Six days without a head-Imagine that.It cannot whistle,it cannot where a hat,and everytime it goes to put a scarf on it just falls back down where its neck once was....but six days.

[StaticFish]

urghhhh

[The Cornishman]

Diary of a headless Ccokroach.

Day1-Showing no adverse effects carrying on as normal,although went to eat a plate of eggs 'n' mash this afternoon found he had nowhere to put it.

Day3-Keeps bumping into things.

Day5-starting to lose the plot now.Keeps walking around in circles proclaiming "head,head-wheres me head"

[magenta]

Thank you maths people. I hate maths, why did I do it?

Mr Cornishman, you have suceeded in making me smile. Briefly.

If I ring up the Samaritans or childline or something, will they do my homework for me?

[The Cornishman]

I made a foxy lady smile.Result! Do I get a shag now?

[Jonny Hoare]

try it

[StaticFish]

sounds like a chris moyles stunt

[magenta]

Yeah if you want. I'm lonely tonight, part of the reason for my misery.

My fella is "too ill" to come & see me. That's not right is it? When is a man ever too ill for a blow job?

[The Cornishman]

Go down to your local 'Starbucks' approach the first handsome man you see ask him if he fancies swapping underpants

[StaticFish]

when he is blow jobbing himself?

ok, maybe not. <eyes move from side to side>

[The Cornishman]

It's a bit dark perhaps thats while you're miserable.I'm no expert,but I suspect it may even get slightly darker,then darker still,and then it will be morning.But even the morning will be fairly dark.Chances are it will be slightly damp aswell,but that's nothing to do with me.And if you don't like it,well tough,move closer to the Equator or something.Weymouth, maybe.

[Sam]

How come g*a*y is censered but not blow job?