[Sidders]

She wouldn't be sneezing on it if you were going from behind.

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

unless she had her head between her legs.

has anyone done the bacon slicer joke yet?

[Mafro]

Nope, feel free...

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

A man goes to the Doctor and says that he has a serious sexual problem.
When asked to give details, the man says that for a very long time he has
been wanting to put his penis in the bacon slicer. The doctor is
astounded, and gives the man some pills and instructs him to take one
every day and to then come back and see him in a week. A week later the
man returns and the Doctor asks him how things went, to which the man
replies that he couldn't resist the urge and finally just had to put his
penis in the bacon slicer. A little worried, the Doctor asks to take a look
at the man's penis, but on inspection he can find nothing wrong with it.
"There's nothing wrong with you, what about the bacon slicer?" asks the
Doctor, to which the man replies "I don't know, she ran away!"

[Walter Sobchak]

A fit secretary where I work sat with us and said "...If you fancy someone just tell them, they can only say no" so i said "I think you're fit and I want to shag you" she said "no".

I hate it when women are right

you should have made it seem like she was coming onto you and said no to her and for her to stop harrassing you. trust me.

Have to remember that one, but to be honest, she's about 24 and stunning, I'm 43 and not!

To be fair that prob wasn't the best chat up line.

Don't worry Betti, if I thought there was any chance I would have said "Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet!" or "Sorry, but you owe me a drink. (Why?) I looked at you and dropped mine"

Courtesy of http://linesthataregood.com/

[Sidders]

Courtesy of http://linesthataregood.com/

That site could transform my life.

[MK Chris]

I think you'd pretty much get the same results you're currently getting to be honest. Maybe a slap or two more.

[Sidders]

I only don't get results because I don't try.

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

ohhhhhhh arrogance from sidla.

thats like humility from Stevo.

[Sidders]

It's true though. Like the girl I fancy at the minute, I am 90% sure she likes me back, I'm just too afraid to ask her out. My only hope is that I accidentally spill the beans while under the influence, trouble is I'm much too controlled when I drink. My other plan is to get off with her on New Years Eve, then at least I have an excuse.

[Walter Sobchak]

~cringe @ new years eve party~

B A D memories there, from My experience you'd be better off just asking her out for a coffee, for starters

[MK Chris]

It's true though. Like the girl I fancy at the minute, I am 90% sure she likes me back, I'm just too afraid to ask her out. My only hope is that I accidentally spill the beans while under the influence, trouble is I'm much too controlled when I drink. My other plan is to get off with her on New Years Eve, then at least I have an excuse.

Jesus it's like being at school again - just f*cking do it.

[kendra k]

topher has it right. if she is into you, it'll be a relief for you to say something. if she's not, at least you'll know.

[Gigglyboots]

Say it. Don't do it under the influence of (too much) alcohol then she should know you are being serious. She might find someone else, then you've lost your chance.

[Mafro]

Get her pinned.

[Sidders]

Not going to happen any time soon.

[MK Chris]

Either do something about it or stop whingeing about it. If you're not prepared to do anything you can never moan that nothing's happening.

[Sidders]

I didn't whinge. It was Gaspode who brought the subject up.

[Adam]

Topher - (random question) - how is the Pop-Campaign - Plastic Bottles or Plastic Surgery going?

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

I didn't whinge. It was Gaspode who brought the subject up.

i never mentioned your pathetic life.

Kendra I have something for you to see...

[Sidders]

You accused me of being arrogant. I was merely defending myself.

Aren't you going to share with us all Gaspode, this is private after all.

[kendra k]

ooohhh.. i wonder what it is.

sidders, don't be jealous.

[Sidders]

I don't mind cos I know you'll forward it all to me anyway.

[Gaspode_The_Wonder_Dog]

who said it was something that could be forwarded?

[MK Chris]

Topher - (random question) - how is the Pop-Campaign - Plastic Bottles or Plastic Surgery going?

3,500 signatures on the web site, probably the same amount (or a bit more) on paper. We're still waiting for the Sun to print it, the reporter who did the story is still convinced they will but the News of the World are on standby as well.